February

I had thought of myself as an exhibitionist for the past few years, and had proven it to myself by sharing some very private and personal photographs of myself with a select group of women who I knew would enjoy them. More recently, I had started taking video of me pleasuring myself; these were seen by a much smaller and appreciative group, and February was always the first member of my audience.

She had told me they were very entertaining, and that she found them much more exciting than the pictures and videos she could find of random strangers on the Internet, because she knew me and appreciated our strong mutual attraction. I was always worried that she would be bored by them - they really do become quite repetitive after a few minutes, as you might imagine, but she found them endlessly enjoyable, and as she left my car after the last two I had shown her (a pair of two-minute episodes in the continuing celebration of my masculinity), she told me was very wet. The smile on her face did not belie her statement.

She had also called me a tease. This is because I have two rules in my photography and my movies: first, my face is never seen - it is an act of trust for others to believe it is me, but I know, so I find it very exciting. The second rule was the one she found frustrating, even annoying: I never finish the act on camera. She felt a little bit cheated to see me take things to the point where she knew I was seconds away if I continued, but then stop, cold, and, as often as not, stop the recording as well since I knew there was nothing more I could show without carrying it too far.

I told her, the first time she mentioned it, that I was happy for her to see that happen, but it would have to be in a private live show just for her; I was not going to do it on camera, ever. I also pointed out that she was in an elite group already. Of all the women I had shared the photographic and cinematic side of myself with, there were only two whom I thought I would be comfortable having watch me in person.

My next words had been, "The offer is there if you ever want to take me up on it. At least think about it, even if you have to say no now."

That had been at least eighteen months ago. I had reminded her once or twice, and then decided it just wasn't a part of the kind of friendship she wanted with me. I could accept that, since I enjoyed her company so much and found it exciting just to be near her and talk with her, so I had not pushed the matter by mentioning it again.

We had met for coffee near her apartment downtown. I had even left work early. In fact, before driving to meet her, I had gone home, showered, and shaved both above and below (just in case!). I was clean from top to bottom, and ready for everything. I had expected that "everything" would be a cup of coffee and hug, and a chaste kiss on the cheek or two, but she seemed to be in a more playful mood than usual. As before, I offered to let her view my most recent opus on my camera. I really appreciated the way she didn't presume I would have anything I might want to show her, but was always pleased when I told her I did. We huddled together in a private corner of the coffee shop, she watching me, rapt, on the small screen, while I watched her face, equally rapt, in person.

Her breathing was shallow and fast; her excitement was almost palpable, and I found it contagious. I was thrilled she was enjoying this so much, both because I was clearly giving her so much pleasure, and because I took so much enjoyment in sharing myself with her this way.

Then, a little to soon for both of our liking, the show was over. It had lasted about three minutes - this it had been all I could manage. I had made it just before leaving to see her, and one reason I didn't want to finish things off, even off-camera, was because I wanted to fully enjoy the feelings she inspired in me.

She turned and looked at me. I could tell her pulse was still a little faster than usual. I leaned in and whispered very gently in her ear.

"It was good for me. Was it good for you?"

It was all I could do to not lick her ear before pulling away, but I knew that kind of presumption would kill the moment, and possibly our friendship.

She turned her head and looked at me.

"Is that the only one you have today?"

Some days, when I have more time to prepare, I bring two or three for her.

"Unfortunately, I've been a little busy lately. Sorry!"

It was true.

"But maybe we could ad lib something..."

I let my voice trail off. It didn't take long for this to sink in.

"Like what?"

She sounded innocent, but I knew she was thinking as fast as I was.

"Why don't we go and talk about this somewhere more private, like your place?"

I think she would normally have said 'no,' but she had been hooked by the video I'd shown her, and was in the right mood to follow through. She knew my respect for her was absolute, and that she would be completely safe alone with me. But she didn't say yes, either. Not just yet. She was still in control of herself, and she wanted me to know it.

"And what, exactly, would we do at my place?"

I smiled. I hoped it was a devilish, sexy smile. I whispered my response.

"I could give you a live show."

She inhaled, deeply.

"You know you want to see it in person."

I paused, but had to press my case.

"You'll be able to see me, hear me, even smell me."

She knew the scent I was talking about. I had been looking in her eyes the whole time. Her eyes are lovely: mysterious, knowing, and wise. I could tell she was wavering.

"You'll also be giving me one of the biggest thrills of my life."

"Really?" This surprised her. I could tell she wanted to believe me, but her innate cynicism needed something more.

"Think about it. You know it's no secret that I'm think you're a very exciting woman and I am extremely attracted to you. That's the only reason you've ever seen any of the pictures and videos I've shown you."

"I'm not sure."

It was a fair answer, but it wasn't a 'no', even if it wasn't a yes either. I leaned over to whisper to her.

"Let me tell you a secret I haven't told you. Since the last time we met, three months ago now, I've imagined you're watching me every time I do it. Sometimes you're telling me to slow down, sometimes to speed up, and sometimes you just watch quietly. And believe me, Miss, I masturbate an awful lot."

She straightened her back. I could tell from her body language she'd made a decision.

"Alright, let's go."

I didn't dare to even seem to hesitate, but I didn't want to seem overeager either. I knew she wanted me to be cool. I stood up as she did, and walked beside her to the door. I opened the door for her, the perfect gentleman, and walked beside her through the now-building rush hour crowds. She lived quite close. It took about five minutes, which seemed like both an eternity and the blink of an eye. She opened the door to her building, and let me through the lobby, into the elevator, and up to her apartment. Then we were inside.

I took off my shoes - force of habit, mostly, but I also knew I would be taking them off soon anyway.

She spoke first.

"Here we are."

"Indeed we are. Are you ready?"

I didn't wait for an answer. I knew I was ready. In fact, I was hard as a rock, and could tell I was already quite wet.

"Where do you want me? Sofa? Bed? Standing? Lying? Sitting? It's all good to me. What would you like to see most? What is my starting position?"

"Let me think a bit while you take off your clothes."

"Sure," I said. Then, a thought. "Do you have any toys?"

She pursed her lips in thought.

"You know I do. I just need to figure out what I'm going to give you."

She walked over to a drawer by her bed.

"Close your eyes - I want this to be a surprise."

I shut my eyes tight. I liked this kind of surprise!"

I heard a rattle as she pulled something out of the drawer, and then the sound of the drawer closing.

"I'll just clean this off for you. You don't know where it's been."

I laughed out loud.

"You know that I would be more than happy to lick it clean for you, before and after use."

"You know that if you were here to do that, it would have seen a much less active life."

The sound of her walking to the bathroom. Water running, the very recognizable sound of something being washed.

"Keep your eyes shut!"

The water had stopped running, and I heard nothing at all now. After a brief interval, I started counted thousands silently to myself while I waited. I had gotten to twenty-five before I heard her walking towards me.

"You may open your eyes. Then, strip for me. But... make it sexy."

Now that was a challenge. I had never before taken my clothes off to entertain someone, but I was thrilled by the chance of doing it for her. And I had promised her a show! I turned towards her, to see what toy she had brought me, but she was holding it behind her back.

"It's still a surprise."

I winked at her, and put my hands my waist. With a quick motion on each side, I pulled my shirt out from my pants. I began to sway my hips a little, from side to side, then front to back. I would normally feel very awkward doing this, especially without music, but with my audience of one, it seemed completely natural. As my body swayed, I began pulling my shirt up my body. I went slowly, teasingly, showing a bit of my left side, then a bit of my right, then a bit of both, then another inch or so. I turned a little this way and that, so she could see me from the side and the back as I tried to stretch things out. I began to really enjoy moving my body, and revealing it to her bit-by-bit, but after about 90 seconds or so, I had exposed my breasts to her and my upward progress was thwarted by my arms. She was watching me like I've never been watched before, as if she didn't want to miss even a breath of mine. It was almost an overwhelming amount of attention, really, but I also knew it would get much more intense once I really got started!

In one quick move, I managed to pull the shirt off and over my head. I was officially semi-naked. I threw my shirt at her in a triumphant motion, but didn't want to break the spell by saying anything. She caught it with her free hand, and held it to her face while she watched me. She breathed from it, taking in my scent. I knew the show must go on - I did not want to disappoint her! I unhitched my belt, and whipped it out of my shorts. I let it fall on her carpet. It barely made a sound.

I felt nervous, and, suddenly, a little bit shy. It crossed my mind that this might be a mistake, but I felt more excited than I had in a very long time. Adrenaline was pumping through my body. I was practically panting in anticipation.

I turned away from her for a strategic moment and wiggled my butt at her. While I was facing away, I undid the button which fastened the waist of my pants together. It opened easily enough, but it required a slightly jerky motion to do this, and I was glad I had hidden it from her. I turned back, with hands on either side of my zipper. I thrust my hips at her a few times; I was fairly confident that she could see my hardness bulging towards her as I did it, but could also tell that she did not mind one bit.

As far as I can tell, there are exactly two ways to undo a zipper when you are doing a striptease - quickly, and slowly. I opted for the former - we're only talking about four inches anyway, so doing it slowly felt like an unnecessary delay. I flashed my underpants at her - I am sure she was somewhat disappointed to see another layer there, but it wouldn't be long now before she would see the real me.

Since she had already had ample time to look at my legs today, I decided to drop my pants fairly quickly. I didn't want to get too fancy here - tripping over myself while undressing would ruin the mood and also be more than a little bit humiliating. I slid them down, relatively slowly, to reveal my underpants. Whenever I see her, I wear designer underpants - just in case. When I was hard, as now, they were a little too small for me. Over the last few years, she had seen enough pictures to know what I had to offer, but I was pretty sure that seeing my barely fitting into my clothes less than five feet from where she stood would be more interesting and exciting than anything I could show her on a tiny screen.

I thrust my crotch towards her a couple of times more, and then let my pants fall to the ground. I stepped out of them, and decided it was time to remove my socks, too. The image of me standing before her naked only to my ankles did not appeal to me. I bent over to quickly pull them off, too, and then stood to face her in my too-tight undies.

I winked at her again, and asked, "Ready?"

"I've been ready since we walked in the door."

That was probably true. There was no way to finish undressing slowly - I was already showing too much, and it seemed cruel to pretend to do a slow reveal when we both knew she would see it all before I had pulled them down two inches. I took a deep breath, and pushed them down all at once. I kept hold of them, stepping out of them when they were about at my ankles, and threw them at her as well. She caught them as easily as she had my shirt, but she kept her eyes on me. There I was, standing happy and gloriously proud of myself. I blew her a kiss.

"Now, the question of where."

She pointed to a sofa sitting in a patch of floor bathed by the sun streaming through the window.

"Over there."

I walked over, trying to act cool and casual. This was a big thing for me, momentous and exciting, but I also wanted to make it as good as possible for her. I lowered myself into a sitting position on the floor. The sun felt warm on my skin. It was lovely.

We were facing each other as she walked towards me. Once she arrived within arms reach of me, she stopped. It was time to show me what she had been concealing. She brought her hand out from behind her back. She was holding a very realistic, and fairly large, dildo. I reached out my hand and took it from her. I knew exactly what to do with it.

I held it near the base, using both hands. The tip was about four inches from my mouth. I leaned towards it, and gently licked it. It was slick; my tongue slid over it more quickly than I expected it to. I sniffed it. I smelled, divinely, of her nectar. She had put the time my eyes had been shut to very good use.

"Very nice. You're as delicious as I had always imagined you must be!"

She smiled at the compliment, and I went back to her toy. I had a mission now, and a very enjoyable one at that: to lick it completely clean, and make sure none of her very personal offering to me went to waste.

I held it at the base, with both hands, at face level, as if there was a man standing directly in front of where I sat. She would, I was sure, find my performance more enjoyable if I treated it like it was the real thing, not an abstract piece of plastic which could be positioned as desired.

I tilted it upwards, and ran my tongue up the shaft from where I clasped it at the base to the very end. I swirled my tongue around the end when I reached it, then gently wrapped my lips around it and moved my head forward so the top inch or so was in my mouth. I pulled it out my mouth as slowly as I could, and leaned forward to give it another bottom-to-top lick. The room was completely silent, aside from the soft noises made by my mouth and tongue. I licked again, and again, and again. If I was receiving this treatment instead of a toy, I would have been almost out of my mind with lust by now. After my next pass, I licked my lips to moisten them, and moved my head forward to take it as far into my mouth as I could. I only managed about two inches or so that first time, but that was enough. I slowly moved my head back and forth, so my lips travelled up and down the head of the shaft. It became a game with me, to see how far into my mouth I could take it. I went slowly and steadily, never forgetting to savour the what remained of her wonderful taste and scent. Finally, I accepted that I would not be able to get the entire thing in my mouth without much more practice, and, again slowly, pulled back until my lips were only circling the very realistic head. I kept my lips over it, but tilted it to my right, turning my head in the same direction. Keeping my lips on as much of it as I could, I slid my head along it until I reached my hands and the base. I swept back and forth over several times, until I could taste nothing more of her, and then a few times after that. I sighed, happy and very excited, as I told her, "Okay, it's clean now!" I handed it back to her, and she put it down on a nearby table.

"And now, if you're ready, it's time for the main event of this afternoon's show."

I turned sideways on the sofa, facing left. I pointed my right knee upward and let my left leg dangle over the side; this gave me balance as I leaned my body back. She would be able to see everything this way. My body was at an angle of about forty-five degrees from the vertical. It was actually quite comfortable, although it may not have looked so at first.

I took a deep breath and relaxed. I started by interlacing my fingers, palms towards her, and stretching my arms out. Then, it was time to get to work. I was very conscious of my vulnerability; I had never given anyone the opportunity to watch me at such an intimate activity, but had to trust that she would find it exciting enough to be worth watching.

I looked towards her, smiled, and licked my lips. I was, at least, confident of my hardness and my ability to pull this off. I reached down with my right, and dominant, hand, and caressed myself. I enjoyed the sensation especially today, since I had just shaved.

I was uncircumcised, and in spite of my earlier acrobatics while disrobing, I was still completely covered. It was time for my last unveiling. I made a sort of fist around my shaft and pulled the skin all the way back. I held it there for a few seconds, then pulled it back up again. I went very slowly at first; I wanted her to be able see all she wanted without rushing anything, and, of course, to prolong my own enjoyment.

Soon, and very unexpectedly, I almost forgot I had an audience. I stopped looking at her, shut my eyes, and rolled my head back. I sped up my pace, slightly, and ran my tongue over my lips. I imagined I was licking her. It was a nice thought, but I made sure that my mounting excitement did not make me speed up. As I settled into the rhythm, I started to arc my chest outward with each stroke. It was involuntary, but I hoped it helped keep her interest. My breathing became a little louder too.

I reached down with my left hand and cupped the base of my manhood. I squeezed, hard enough to hurt, but not enough to distract me. It felt good.

I decided it was time to change my technique. I relaxed my fingers a bit at the bottom of my stroke, so that they were no longer holding my skin as they moved, and let my hand travel back up my shaft, flesh against sensitive flesh. I was very wet, and my hand travelled smoothly back and forth. Without the insulating additional layer of skin, this provided much stronger sensations. I continued to go slowly, but I was far too distracted by my own pleasure to be disciplined or deliberate.

I decided it was time to go a step further. Holding myself with my left hand, I slid my right hand up to the head and rubbed it, gently, with my palm. My entire body shook with the intensity of this new motion. I knew I wouldn't do this for long: I didn't want to rub off all of my wetness, nor to reach release quite yet. I was close, and coming closer every second, but it was time to pull back.

I returned to my earlier grip, so my foreskin moved with my hand. I took a few long, slow strokes and then switched gears. My hand moved up and down very quickly - probably two or three times a second. I decided it was time to warn her, so she could move to a better vantage point if it suited her. And I didn't want her to miss it; this was the only reason I was here, really. I would have happily let her see everything else on video, although I knew it wouldn't have been quite as interesting or exciting for either of us.