"Diane, you need to get laid," my long time friend Joan is telling me. "You can't keep moping around just because you caught that bastard cheating on you. He was fucking half the women in town before he met you and will continue, it's just his nature. He makes a pass at every female he meets. He even made a pass at me."
"But the sex was so good," I tell her. "Why would he need anyone else?"
"It has nothing to do with you. I'm sure you're right, the sex was good. Maybe great. That doesn't matter to guys like him. They can't be faithful. It's probably an ego thing, he always needs to conquer someone new. Instead of being sad, you should be glad you found out so early."
"Well, I'm sure you're right. And maybe I'm missing the sex more than him."
"That's why I'm telling you, you need to get laid. Need to discover that you can have great sex with someone else. Like the old saying goes, when you fall off the horse you should get right back on. Sitting around crying about it is a waste of time, you need to get back in the sack with a guy. Tonight after nine, there's a DJ at the Hyatt, it's almost like a meat market, so many girls and guys looking to get hooked up. We should go there and get you with a good looking guy."
"You're probably right. But I just came to see you for the day, I'm in jeans, I don't have anything to wear to a place like that. Maybe some other time."
I've got something you can wear. In fact, I have the perfect thing for you to wear, a little red dress, c'mon, lets see how you look."
I follow her into the bedroom, She goes to the closet. "Joan, the reason I knew the sex with Charlie was so great is that most of my experience has been not great, sometimes just awful. The chances are, if I do manage to meet a guy at the hotel, the result could be awful instead of great. In fact, it most likely will be. I shouldn't do this."
"Diane, what's the difference between great and not great sex? It's having the guy pay attention to you, care about you instead of just sticking his cock in you and getting off. It's having a guy that will eat your pussy, isn't it?"
"Uh, I've never really thought of it as blunt as that. . . . but, yeah, you're probably right."
"So if a guy seems like he's going to whisk you off for sex, just ask him if he eats pussy before you go with him."
"I couldn't do that. How could I ask a stranger something like that?"
"Diane, you're the school teacher with the vocabulary. Just find a nicer way to ask the same thing. Now, here's the perfect dress for you."
She's showing me a red dress. "The little red dress that you mentioned is really little isn't it?" I say to her.
"Well, that's the idea. You have to display the merchandise. Try it on."
She convinces me to at least try it and I do. I'm looking in the mirror. "Joan, this is so skimpy. My ass is almost showing and my boobs are almost popping out of the top. I look like a hooker. I can't go out in this."
"Yes you can, that's the whole idea. You want to look sexy and you sure do."
"But someone is probably going to ask me how much I charge."
"Well, give them a number. Just say $500. The money isn't important, what's important is that you get laid."
I have to laugh. "Joan, you're nuts. I tell them $500 and ask them if they eat pussy, is that the idea?"
"Well, it isn't going to happen that way, but basically yeah."
. . . . . . . .
"George you need to get laid," my good friend and business partner Ken is saying to me. "You can't just keep moping around because you caught her cheating on you. It isn't healthy and it isn't good for business. We depend on you and lately you're spending half your time off in lala land somewhere."
"But the sex was so good," I tell him. "Why would she need someone else?"
"George, she went back to an old boy friend. Be glad it happened so soon before you got seriously committed because if she missed him that much, sooner or later it would have happened anyway. It doesn't matter how good the sex was."
"Yeah, you're probably right. And maybe I'm missing the sex more than I am her."
"That's why I'm telling you, you need to get laid. Discover that you can have great sex with someone else. There's an old saying that if you fall off the horse, you need to get right back on and ride it again. You need to get laid. Downstairs in another couple hours they have a DJ and the place gets crowded, it's like a meat market, full of guys and girls trying to hook up. We've got this suite that we used for the meeting all night anyway, you might as well find someone and bring her up here."
"You mean meet a girl that I find attractive and get her up here for sex all in just a short time? I don't think I can do that."
"Then get a hooker. The identity of the female doesn't matter, it's getting you laid that matters. It's a hotel, there probably are hookers there, too."
"I don't know. I've had some lousy sex in my time, that's why I knew it was so good with her. Finding a hooker just means more lousy sex."
"What's the difference between lousy and great sex? It's having the girl do everything you want her to do, her letting you do everything you want and acting like she wants it. Hookers will do that, at least the good ones. If you want her to suck you, she will. So that's probably the best bet, find a top notch hooker. Hey, we have this cash we were going to use tomorrow to get those things but I can get more from the bank. So here, here's a thousand dollars cash, that should get you the best hooker in the place. Now, let's go down and eat dinner. We had a great meeting, are going to make a lot of money and we should celebrate. Then we get you that classy hooker." . . . . . . . .
"I'm standing here all alone, Joan is off dancing with what looks like a great guy. I'm in this horrible dress. I can't bend over or my ass pops out and if it doesn't my boobs will fall out. People must think I'm a hooker" Diane is thinking, looking around nervously in the middle of a very large crowd.
"O.k., lets find you the right girl, George," Ken is saying, breaking the way as we push our way through the mob. "There she is," he almost yells, excitedly. "I knew there'd be a hooker here somewhere. Look over toward the windows, the girl in the red dress."
"She's really built, pretty nice looking, why do you think she's a hooker?" George asks.
"The dress. The reason you think she's built is because she's practically falling out of that dress. Her body is for sale and she's advertising it. Besides, look at the way she's looking around nervously," Ken goes on. "She's afraid management will recognize her and toss her out. These hotels don't like to get a reputation for having hookers. Look, just walk up to her and ask her to go to your room with you, ask her how much she charges. You'll find out, she'll go with you."
"Well, she's nice enough looking, I'm interested anyway but I'm not sure about just blurting out that kind of offer, but here goes, we'll see what happens," and George starts across the room to the girl in the red dress.
Diane notices George staring at her as he works his way across the room. "Well, he's nice enough looking. That sport coat looks very good, sort of expensive. Get ready, Diane, act nice to him, see how far you can get." Diane is thinking.