Love is complicated. It is messy and full of battle scars. Only a few couples make it nowadays and to be honest, that is terrifying. Although I loved Drew, I couldn't help but wonder what was missing. I know it sounds cliché but something was definitely missing. Things weren't as exciting as they used to be. Everything feels as though it has somehow changed and that our feelings for one another have changed. Never in my life did I imagine that I would ever become a cheater. I had been hurt in the past and so I thought that that would somehow keep me from doing the same thing.
My heart felt as though it was at some sort of weird standstill in my relationship with Drew. One drunken night of pouring out my heart and soul to a sexy stranger messed up everything. The girl I thought I was, is apparently not who I am. This sexy stranger had crept into my life and my heart before I even knew he was there. He talked to me, listened, and became a shoulder to cry on when things were falling apart in my relationship. Parker gave me advice and soon enough was my sole confidant. It seemed as though there were three people in my relationship (Parker, Drew and I). Given the fact that Drew never talked to me when things went sour, I was always alone. Drew talked to everyone but me: himself, his friends, his family and even God. With the way things were going he was in a relationship with himself and Parker and I were bystanders.
Feeling shut out and alone, Parker comforted me. Parker couldn't stand the way that I was being treated. I talked to him about every detail of my relationship. He knew how I felt towards Drew and what my dreams for our future were. I told him about our sex-life, which had taken a nose dive that was only going downhill from then. Another drunken night ensued... Parker then began to tell about me all about his long-term, two year, dry spell. When I drink, I get flirtatious and that's exactly what happened. With every drink, I thought less and less about Drew. Deep down I knew it was wrong, but I was too drunk and lonely to care.
Everything that Drew didn't do for me, Parker wanted to do for me. He talked about how he would take care of me and how he would give me the romance that I deserved. Parker was the kind of guy who actually liked cuddling, taking long walks on the beach, cooking dinner together and watching movies. His philosophy was that he didn't care what we were doing as long as we were together. Drew has never said something that romantic, nor did he enjoy the closeness or intimacy that came with relationships.
Out of curiosity, I asked about the typical evening spent with a lady for him. Initially, he started as a gentleman, reminding himself about my relationship. Parker told me that he would like to do something sweet like a picnic out on the beach at candlelight. His house was close by so he and his date would be able to have a nice walk along the coast. Then once they would get back to his place, wine and a movie. There would be no pressure to sleep together or anything. "It would be the lady's choice." he says. Now if he got the green light, that would be a different story. Liquid courage persuaded me to ask for the alternate story, asking him not to spare a single detail. It would seem as though he took that as his own green light. Suddenly, I was the girl in the story, but I had no objections. He started:
"I'm not going to lie or pretend that I haven't notice your looks. In fact, I have noticed a lot of things about you, things that I find extremely sexy. If given the chance, I wouldn't be able to help myself. I would want to pull you in and kiss your soft and beautiful lips. My hands would find the small of back, pulling you into me. My right hand would eventually find your cheek and my left would find the nape of your neck. Both of our tongues would explore each others' mouths feverishly. Being a gentleman, I would ask, 'Would you like to go any further?' Once I get your approval, I would break away from your lips and trail soft kisses down to your neck, moving from one side to the other.
