He looked at her with an intimidation she could not fail to acknowledge. It was apparent to her that he had something he wanted her to know but was hesitant about it. She stayed silent and patiently waited.
Her heart felt like it was beating faster and faster with each passing second. He sat down across from her, a little too close for her comfort, but she was afraid to make a sound, in fear that any peep would silence his attempt to unravel something she felt she always needed to hear, but never validated.
"I-I have been wanting to ask you something. But, I have tried to put the question in the right words. I am aware that I can sometimes seem very obtuse and almost uncaring, but I can assure you that is not the real case." He paused as if searching for his words, his breath shallow. "It's- hard for me to admit my feelings, and I wished it had gone away many times over the years, but no matter what I do or how I turn things around this way and that, I am still so fascinated by you. I find you have bewitched me just as much as you did my own friend. The time you disappeared, I was heartbroken. Yes, I hated seeing my friend in such despair, but also because I feared I would never see you again."
He laughed. "I scolded myself for having any intimate affections towards you; you and your awkwardness. Your uncomfortable self-conscious demeanor about your tall figure. You are timid and awkward. But you are also beautiful, and admittedly I have fantasized about you more than once. I fantasize about you to this day, and have been for years. Your loveliness, your beautiful figure. I have fantasies about how your full lips would feel on mine. The few times our fingers touched, I shuddered at the softness of it. I always wished I could hold your hand, but was always happy to have a brief contact with your warm skin, even if it was just for a moment. I have never wanted anyone so much. You're the one thing in the World I want most but also the only thing I cannot have. I long to have you. I want to feel your small breasts cupped within my hands, your pointy nipples pressing against my palms. It makes me hard just picturing the vision of your cunt, and imagining the smell of its delicious, faint perfume. If I could ever get the chance to involve all my senses in your cunt-to taste, smell, touch and feel it- I would die a happy man.
"You are my fantasy, my drive, and my dilemma. I will never get over you. I tried, I tried everything! I looked at all your flaws, and tried to come to terms with seeing you in a judgmental light, to be repelled or disgusted by you, but all I found myself doing is hating only myself, for lusting after you with so much passion and ardor, it keeps me up at night. I always wonder and hope, my love, if there would be a moment in the future I would have you all to myself, if only for a day. No one to claim you, or say you're theirs. Just one day where I could have you all for myself, with no hint of regret or hesitation. To make love to you over and over, so for once in my wretched life I could experience the embodiment of Heaven, which you represent to me. But that is only in my dreams, where my most personal and intimate fantasy expressions my subconscious knows all too well, play out over and over again, tormenting me. I cannot hide from it. Every other night it haunts me with the vision of you and everything I want from you. Oh, what bliss I would feel to cum inside your pussy over and over, to fill you up, to feel you all around me. I want to fill you up! I long to ravish you, to taste you, and violate you if I could! Oh, I wish I could! Now, even now! If ever I am given the chance, I would savor every part of you, and even then I'm not even sure that would be enough to satisfy my hunger for you."
The silence after that was deafening. She stared at him in shock and amazement. The clocks ticking in the corner seemed a lot louder than normal as they sat in silence, staring at each other, waiting for another word to be outed. She swallowed and managed to say,
"What was your question?"
He seemed amazed that he even forgot to ask the one question. He had been waiting for the right moment to ask. His eyes looked toward one part of the floor to another, and darted right back toward her. "My question was, how do you feel toward me?" He licked his lips.
"And please don't say something to keep yourself from speaking the truth. I am not searching for any sort of hindrance on the necessity to keep things friendly. I merely ask to have my own feelings validated with yours."
She smiled, "But this has come at such a shock-"
"Is it really so surprising to you that I want you so much? All in all, you are a beautiful woman. People have told you your whole life. Are you going to let yourself sit in limbo on your true feelings?"
"You know I can't."
"Because of him?"
"Yes. And neither can you. This is just wrong."
He looked at her and traced his eyes over the contours of her face.
He wanted her more now than he did a few minutes ago. Her resistance was a turn-on. She had such an innocence about her that made him feel he was trying to seduce a virgin. She was sweet and her soft voice going perfectly with her angelic nature. Oh, but how he wished to see her frazzled! Oh, he was being tortured, sitting here directly in front of her, and keeping his whole being from grabbing, and effortlessly ripping off her shirt and unbuckling her bra. He imagined shoving his hand down her short jean shorts and fingering her small, moist pussy. He couldn't. He had to respect her. He had to wait when she was ready. He prayed she would be soon.
He fucked more than one girl since he had known her. But they were nothing to him. He needed the distraction from his obsession with her. More than once, he would cum and scream her name. None of his flings liked that very much and he was scolded every time. But he couldn't help it. He saw her face instead of theirs while he penetrated them. The longing was so unbearable he wasn't sure how much longer he had until he lost his mind. He needed her. He needed her now.
"His friendship is second to how much I want you."
She looked at him suspiciously, "So, you just want to fuck me? Just a roll in the hay?"
"You know I want more than that."
"What makes you think I'll let you fuck me?"
"Because I have seen you staring at me when you thought I wasn't looking. I have seen your jealousy when you saw me with other women. You are transparent to me. I can read you like a book."
She looked down and blushed, "If that were true, what would make this deception toward him worth this lay?"
He looked at her and uttered silently, "He has fucked other women while he was with you."
