It was getting to be a routine. She would finish reading, turn out the light and go straight to sleep. No conversation, in case we broach the forbidden subject which used to have us arguing almost every night. How long had it been? Two or three months. It felt like twelve. And never an explanation. She lay there with her back to me as I stared at the ceiling. Lying in the dark, in my own house, with my own wife, my erection straining against the bed sheets, unsatisfied again.
Jerking off just wasn't the same, although it had its benefits. I could imagine anything I wanted. This was my release, my salvation. Lorie never featured in my daydreams. Her coldness, distance and unfortunate ineptitude in bed couldn't be part of my private thoughts. Instead, I conjured up amazing, fantastic, sexy women. Over the weeks and months, they became characters with their own desires - for me, of course - staggering libidos, riotously inventive sexual imaginations, and endless stamina. They could go for as long as I needed them.
My dreams started in the last few hours at work. I would never masturbate there - a fantasy with one of my girls followed by the dull reality of my desk and computer just wouldn't do. I would build up the fantasy over a couple of hours, alone in my white-walled cubicle at headquarters, half my brain on the stock market and the other half constructing elaborate plots, characters, encounters... Then, when I got home, I would adapt the plot to suit my mood and, when Lorie fell asleep, slowly bring myself to an orgasm while the whole private movie played out in my head.
It worked, after a fashion. It got me off. But it was a lonely way to come, made more lonely by the presence of an attractive girl in bed next to me. But was she was always "tired" - I knew that to be a lie. Perhaps she was fucking someone else. Whatever, man. This marriage is going nowhere and as soon I can, I'll leave and fuck my way through the young beauties in the office. But for now, I'm limited to my left hand and my over-active imagination.
Tonight's dream has been building up since about 3pm. It's one of my best, an adaptation of a recurring theme. I love this one, and especially love playing around with it. There's so much latitude. I should write for the screen, or pen an erotic book. I'm a genius, in my own mind.
You see, I like the idea of being obliged by some powerful force to perform sexual acts with huge numbers of girls, one after the other. I've imagined it a thousand ways, and made the girls available in any number of highly original fashions, but tonight's is my favourite so far. Is Lorie asleep? Her breathing's slow and regular. Its been about 20 minutes since she turned the light off. Guess so. My Time now.
Part 2