Cupids Lead Arrow Ch 04 Revivification

(North Carolina - two years later)

It was a Friday when Lucinda and I arrived back in Washington DC at a very early hour in the morning. In spite of our tiredness from the overnight flight, I could see that she shared the same sense of elation after being away from home for two years. We were driven into the Headquarters of the Peace Corps for a debrief. Somehow Lucinda was processed very quickly, so we were soon sharing an emotional farewell in the foyer before she had to leave for a flight to Los Angeles.

My debrief seemed to be more extensive. It may have been because I was not replaced as I'd undertaken a unique role. Strangely I probably gained more benefit from the debriefing officer, Cheryl Dunston, than she obtained from me. As all my communications with the Corps had been through the Peace Corps office in Dar es Salaam, I hadn't been completely conversant with how things happened. My debrief was the first time I'd heard that a training project I'd started had been given a name; 'Arusha Advance'.

It was a partnership program to establish a more formal competency based training process for nurses at the hospital. When I asked the Corps for specialist medical equipment not readily available through the local Tanzanian system, I was provided with most of what I requested. This included autoclaves, defibrillators, patient monitors, ECG machines and even a portable x-ray machine. I'd assumed this had been provided by a central Peace Corps fund. Now I discovered it had been through community donations direct to this project.

I'd previously seen Cheryl's name on some paperwork; however she now explained: "Dar es Salaam insists everything must be processed through them; however I've been their contact for the financing. Your first request came to me just when a couple of ladies representing a community group indicated they were keen to make donations. They were the ones that insisted it be for Tanzania. Not only have they provided financial donations, but they also started the monthly comfort packs for all volunteers in Tanzania. The feedback on the comfort packs has been so positive, the Corps is considering expanding it to other countries. Of course, part of the attraction is that the 'Arusha Advance Ladies', as we call them, do all the packing and even ship them direct to Dar es Salaam. They've also provided most of the medical equipment you requested for your hospital although this has all been processed through the Corps in DC."

I was astounded and was keen to hear more. Cheryl continued: "The Arusha Advance Ladies come mainly from Virgina and North Carolina. My working contact has been with Mrs Drummond. She requested I find a returned volunteer to speak at their function on Monday. I've arranged for Antonia Cantu to speak as she lives nearby, however you'd be the perfect candidate if you could make it. You live in North Carolina, don't you?"

"Yes, I was going to my parent's home in Hickory. Where is this talk to be held?"

"A country club in Raleigh. It commences at 10.30 am."

"Well I can hardly say no considering how much I've benefited from their generosity. I haven't anything prepared but I should be able to cobble together a few stories."

The Corps had organized a rental car for my trip to Hickory so I could see my parents that night. I had much to tell them and catch up on, however they contained their questioning so I could have an early night. However, the next day I remained at the kitchen table either eating or talking about my experience.

During the discussions Mom pulled down a shoe box from the kitchen hutch in which she had stored my letters. "I kept all these letters as one day you'll find you've written a very interesting story. I've often reread them to friends and visitors."

"Actually it would be helpful to read the first few so I can recall all my initial impressions. As I told you I've been asked to give a talk on Monday."

"Oh, you've made some great insights. In fact, the lady working for the Peace Corps was really interested. She visited twice and spent a couple of hours with your dad and me on each occasion."

"What? You had someone visit from the Peace Corps?"

"No ... what did she say Peter? She was working for them ... she wasn't a volunteer like you, but she was trying to help with fundraising and other things."

I was now thoroughly intrigued, so I asked: "Did she read the letters?"

"No, but I must have read extracts from recent letters."

Maybe this was how some items appeared in the comfort packs. "Did you mention my need for dental floss?"

Chuckling Mom said: "Yes. It's amazing how we take for granted the availability of little things."

"Do you recall this lady's name?"

"Now let me think. Was it Judith ... or ... Peter, help me."

Dad just shook his head but said: "She was a very pleasant young woman."

"He is just saying she was very attractive," Mom translated.

"Did she say she was from the Arusha Advance Ladies?"

"She may have, but I don't recall the name."

This conversation left me speculating as to how she had found my parents address and who she was. This was one issue I intended to follow up on Monday.

On Sunday evening, I prepared some images into a sequence on my laptop with explanations and accompanying stories for my presentation. As my body hadn't adjusted back to the east coast time zone, I naturally woke early on Monday morning. It was still a three hour drive to Raleigh, but I'd left early in case of traffic. As I drove, I conducted a final rehearsal.

The country club was a larger complex than I expected. There were pools, tennis courts, several buildings, plus the mandatory golf course. At the reception I discovered there were several event venues, but the noticeboard still reflected the weekend weddings and functions. The duty receptionist eventually determined that the event was in the Oak Room but suggested I wait in the bar as I was an hour early.

I was sitting quietly in a chair when behind me I heard: "Hello Matt. I didn't expect to see you here."

I turned and immediately stood up as soon as I realized it was Connie. We both instinctively shared a hug and kissed cheeks. "You're looking good. In spite of being a Columbia girl, you must have found a good job to be here."

"Yes, an excellent job." Then with curiosity written on her face she said: "I have to ask, what are you doing here? I thought it would be at least two more months before you returned."

Wondering why she may have been keeping tabs on me, I cautiously replied: "As I didn't undertake any in country training, I came home after two years with a colleague I'd been working with. "Actually, I'm at this club waiting for a Mrs Drummond."

As Connie almost pirouetted, she said: "Well it looks like you've found her."

"What ... you're married ... congratulations. When did this happen?"

"Six months ago, and Tom is handsome and everything I've dreamed of ... but I'll fill you in with all the important details such as the wedding dress, the bridesmaid's dresses and the page boy's outfit later."

It was good to see that Connie was so chirpy, however I started feeling uneasy as to what this meant. Before I could ask questions, she continued: "Am I right in assuming you're here instead of Antonia Cantu?"

"Yes, I arrived back on Friday, so maybe the message hasn't reached you yet."

"That's no problem. The ladies won't be disappointed to hear from the A-list celebrity rather than someone from the chorus line."

"Connie ... I'm totally in the dark on everything concerning the Arusha Advance Ladies. Who are they? How did you get involved?"

"Have you spoken to Janet?"

"No ... is she involved?"

"Well, you're bound to find out anyway now. You might say she set this up. She is the patron. She made me the convener."

"Why? I'm confused."

"Why do you think? When I just shook my head, she continued: "She still loves you ... and regrets what happened. I think she wants to make up for her ... she just needed to help you."

"How do you know that?"

"We've been friends too long for me not to know what she thinks. She has a letter in her handbag that she reads whenever she gets depressed. She thinks I don't know. After she broke up, you wrote to her, didn't you? When you see her, ask to see the letter. It must be quite dogeared by now."

I had digested Connie's claim that Janet still loved me, however I suddenly was struck with a realization: "Will she be here today?"

"Of course. She is the patron."

With that confirmation, I became distracted by various conflicting thoughts. I sat down and tried to process what this meant, what I felt. I was not prepared for us to meet. What would I say?

Soothingly Connie focused me back to the present: "You can't stay here Matt. I'll take you to the Oak Room so you can set up. Did you bring anything to show us?"

"Um ... no, well no objects. I have a memory stick with some photos that I thought I could use as talking points."

"That will be perfect," Connie stated with forced enthusiasm. She then leant down to grab my hand to ensure I responded to her direction: "Come with me."

There was a small control room adjacent to the podium in the Oak Room. Connie turned on the computer and set it up so I could load the images from my flash drive. We then changed seats so she could prepare them so that I could use a small fob to change the images during my talk.

"If it's okay, I'll just scroll through each frame again as a refresher."

"That's fine. I'll be back to activate the images for the projector and then I'll be introducing you."

Connie was away for about 20 minutes, greeting people as they arrived. When she returned, I'd regained my equilibrium and was determined that I wouldn't be distracted by Janet's presence.

After making some clicks on the computer, Connie said: "Just press the right button on the fob to advance your images. If you need to go back, press the left. Are you now set?"

Just at that moment, through the window from my flank position, I watched Janet walk to the podium. Immediately all my feelings of attraction for her were revived, but I needed to know how she had reacted when she heard I was here. Impatiently I turned to Connie to ask: "What did she say when you told her I was the speaker?"

Connie certainly acted sheepishly as she replied: "I didn't have a chance to tell her. She was busy speaking to other guests, so I only had time to say everything was ready."

As I considered the consequences of Connie's failure, I listened as Janet welcomed everyone.

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to our monthly meeting of the Arusha Advance Ladies. As you know, our name was not of our choosing. It was bestowed upon us by the Peace Corps. Regrettably their bureaucratic response to our suggested change has been met with reluctance as the name has been registered into their database. Of course I'm conscious that without the support of some of our husbands we'd never have been so successful. Consequently, in appreciation of their noble efforts, I hope they will accept the complementary title of being known as Honorary Ladies at our meetings."

This certainly didn't sound like a college girl. She was poised and looked very businesslike in her tailored mid blue suit that somehow emphasized her figure and femininity. Her hair was neatly tied back in a complex French braid that had been prepared with great care. I was instantly mesmerized by her voice. Janet was an eloquent public speaker drawing everyone into her theme with her lighthearted humor. She continued efficiently with interesting developments and details including changes in the committee.

Finally her concluding remarks were: "I've previously told you of the positive feedback we've received from the Peace Corps volunteers in Tanzania. Connie tells me that last week the Corps asked if we were prepared to expand our efforts to other countries. Of course Connie will be handing that issue for consideration to the new convener, Elizabeth Harris."

Until that moment, I hadn't realized that Connie had stepped into the main room and stood adjacent to the podium as Janet announce: "Before I hand over to Connie Drummond, on your behalf I'd like to thank her for her tireless work in establishing the Arusha Advance Ladies and being the best assistant and friend I could have ever asked for."

After some applause, she said: "As her last official duty I'd now ask Connie to introduce our guest speaker today."

Before Connie stepped up to the podium, she waved back at me to come out of the side room. As I did, I caught the first glance from the now seated Janet and her resultant shock as she recognized me.

"Today we're fortunate to have with us Dr Matthew Allister, the instigator and principal player in the project called Arusha Advance. He only arrived back in country on Friday after two years in Tanzania. He obviously couldn't wait to come here to Raleigh to bring us up to date with the project. Please extend a warm welcome to Dr Allister."

I moved to the center of the podium and studiously avoided looking at Janet as I cast my eyes about the audience. There were at least 50 women plus three men in the audience. I'd originally envisaged that they'd be old, retired biddies who had been looking for something to keep themselves occupied. What surprised me was they were so much younger than I'd anticipated. Women in their 20s, 30s and 40s. Immediately I realized I would need to keep on my toes with this group. So I commenced:

"Thank you for this opportunity to talk to you today. You'd might expect me to say that as I've been the beneficiary of your fund-raising efforts and generosity while on assignment in Tanzania. Before I tell you about my work and a little about the community and the environment I've been working in, I have a confession to make.

Until my return on Friday, I was unaware that this organization existed. I'm still not sure how that could possibly have occurred. I suspect my isolation where I relied almost exclusively on a Tanzanian form of snail mail and the bureaucracy of the Peace Corps are some of the reasons. While I was not aware of this organization, I'm now acutely aware that my ambitious project couldn't have been so successful without your support.

Before you castigate me for my lack of curiosity, I'd assumed that the medical equipment you provided had been funded from the Corps' own finances. I guess I never considered questioning the source when it was so readily made available. Let me explain it another way. When did you last question where your water came from? When it's readily available to you, we tend to take it for granted. In Tanzania, there were so many basic things I couldn't take for granted, including water, that I was often distracted by those basic things.

I can say that every month when a comfort pack arrived, I looked to the sky to bless the astuteness and kindness of whoever was responsible. Every item was treasured and contributed to the maintenance of my sanity. While I was reluctant to give up any of the food items, they did prove to be a powerful diplomatic tool for convincing community leaders to provide support when they were otherwise reluctant."

I then started showing the images as I spoke in detail of the project's achievements and a little about my lifestyle. When I finished, I was inundated with questions. I hoped this showed their enthusiasm rather than the inadequacy of my presentation.

It was then that I consciously searched out Janet. She was looking drawn. Her eyes were puffy and the tissue in her hand was evidence that she was vainly trying to control her emotions. I had to look away if I was to retain my own composure.

The questions were mostly insightful and had me thinking in order to provide the details they were seeking from my response. This at least stopped me dwelling on Janet in the front row.

Finally, Connie stepped in and said: "Ladies, I have been totally captivated by Dr Allister's talk, however we've gone well over time. I know Marjorie has been patiently waiting with a burning issue, so I'll have to make hers the last question."

Marjorie stood for her question: "Why did you join the Peace Corps, and after your obvious success, would you want to do another assignment?"

"Wow, I am still suffering jet lag and barely certain where I am. To be honest, I haven't given any consideration about doing another assignment. Over the last couple of days I've been seduced by the decadence of warm showers, air-conditioning, fresh food in a refrigerator and catching up on news in English. Let's just say, with your help, I've developed an accredited nurses training program that will have profound long term benefits for people in that part of Tanzania. It has given me a deep sense of satisfaction that I have made a difference. I hope this isn't the only time I have this feeling of achievement. I'm about to start a new endeavor as a family physician in Cary. I only hope that it will give me this same sense of fulfillment. However, if I fail as a family physician, who knows, perhaps I'll look for another Peace Corps challenge."

With that I made it clear that I'd finished, by thanking everyone again. I just hoped that they weren't conscious that I'd deliberately avoided part of the question. Fortunately Connie's expression of appreciation made it clear that there would be no follow up.

It was then that Janet stood and walked to the rear and left the room. I could see from Connie's reaction that this was expected. With a deep breath, Connie stepped into the breach and conducted the final farewell and reminding them of the coffee in the Trophy Room and the timing for the next meeting.

I stood to the side as the ladies passed me by. Quite a few stopped and thanked me for my informative talk. As the last one passed, I gave Connie a questioning look.

She shrugged her shoulders and said: "It was good I didn't give her a warning, or she'd have left straight away. At least she gave the opening address."

I pondered what I should do, then Connie beckoned with: "Will you join us in the Trophy Room. Afterwards Janet had planned to have lunch with our guest, but if she's gone, I'll ask a couple of other ladies to join us."

I didn't need to explain, but on the spur of the moment I strode off to the rear exit where I'd last seen Janet. "I'll be back," I called, assuming she'd understand the rest.

I was soon scanning the corridors, poking into open rooms on my way to the reception. Reasoning that if she was leaving, I might just see her in the parking lot, I headed outside. Stumped, I decided to walk about the outside of the complex before giving up.

Then I saw her standing on a verandah staring off into the distance. As I approached, she heard my feet on the gravel path and was startled. Her face also told me she had been crying. I stopped about six paces away wondering what to say. In fact we both just stood still for a minute.

I didn't want to cause a scene and I didn't want to hurt her, however her actions with the Arusha Advance Ladies confirmed what I always suspected; she still had feelings for me.

Tentatively I asked: "Have you been well, Janet?"

"Yes ... thank you."

I was about to ask about her work and the outcome with her father's will when she commenced. Initially her speech was stilted as if making a formal statement but as her emotions took control, she poured out a continuous flow of words.

"I'm so very sorry for the hurt I have caused you. My actions were totally unfair. I acted abominably and deserve your contempt. My behavior was disgraceful and warrants your strongest condemnation. I acted hastily and if I had my time again, I'd do things differently. I didn't mean to be so callous and blunt ... I was just ... overwhelmed by ... everything."