Chase & Virginity

I was practically holding my breath, excited, anticipating. I couldn't believe what I was doing. A part of me was humming all over with the thrill of the very prospect. The reserved, sensible part of me--the part I usually operated from- however, knew it was a bit reckless and entirely foolish.

I could still stop and turn back, call the whole thing off. There was still time. Yet, beyond all sense and reason, I wasn't. I WANTED to do it. I wanted to meet with him.

Chase.

Just a quick, icy-blue gaze sent my heart aflutter. One flash of his sideways grin, weakened my knees. A bat of his long lashes and the husky timbre of his voice had me swooning. He was irresistible.

Pulling into the large, paved parking lot, I almost immediately spotted Chase's dusty, black SUV.It was a stark contrast to the vivid orange line on the ground beside it. It was in a spot facing a small open-fielded area -sprinkled with tall pine trees-near the gateless entrance I had just pulled through; just like he'd texted me. I rolled into the empty space beside him.

I could hear, and feel, the booming bass of his music; see the towering trees, swaying in the breeze, reflected in his closed windows. Noticing me, he shifted in his seat, reaching to turn down the music and cut the engine.

Parked, I felt a heady rush that made me feel light and slightly faint. Totally exhilarated. And totally wanting to make a run for it. My cheeks felt warm. Was it getting harder to breathe all of a sudden? I was there. Chase was there. We were there. Together. Just us. Alone. Outside of work. For the first time. This was it. There was no turning back now. It was officially happening.

Letting out a big breath, I cut the engine and got out of the car. I couldn't believe I was. It felt surreal, like I had been body-snatched, taken over. This was so unlike me. The thrill of it was utterly intoxicating.

Chase was already out of his car- leaning back lazily against it in a black-hooded sweatshirt and light jeans-when I got out of mine. In that outfit, his bright eyes popped. The loosely-hanging tips of his tousled caramel hair, fluttered gently in the breeze.

To steady my nerves, feeling awkward and exhilarated, I scanned our surroundings. The parking lot, reeking heavily of newly laid tar, overlooked the slightly choppy waters of a small lake. And being a mild sunny afternoon, it was, as was nearly always the case, crowded and alive with activity.

I loved the place, knew it well; been there many times growing up. It was a popular, family-friendly spot for locals; walkers, recreational bicyclists, and patrons from the nearby award-winning ice cream shop, looking to enjoy their favorite frozen treat with a scenic view.

Lots of people. Lots of witnesses. Just in case. That's why I chose it.

My cheeks flamed just thinking about it. I knew he was staring at me, waiting, watching me pay an efforted amount of attention to everything but him. I could feel it. I couldn't be sure of what he was thinking, but under his scrutiny, I felt...Exposed. Vulnerable. The heat in my cheeks spread to my ears.

I turned to look back at him. He was still leaning against his car, his arms loosely crossed in front of his chest, looking totally at ease. Glad one of us was. As if able to read my thoughts, he flashed a charming sideways grin, my weakness, and shoved off his SUV and took a step forward.

"Oh, no. You stay right there," I pointed at him. Although the way I felt with him was like a drug I desperately feined for- and yearned to explore more with him closer, much closer- I didn't entirely trust myself around him.

I was mind-boggled and tongue tied around him. My body was loose and weak with just a look from him. I felt faint at the flash of his signature sideways grin. I was completely entranced and transfixed. Just thinking about him and our previous phone conversations, spread the heat from my cheeks down to the tops of my breasts, down further. I felt slightly breathless. No, I felt safe-r with the prospect of witnesses-at the very least to hold us accountable-and a giant hunk of vehicular metal between us.

Because I was a virgin.

I wasn't entirely sure-though after our many racy conversations I had become increasingly, desperately certain I was-ready for sex. And his apparent experience was absolutely intimidating. Then again, his experience and unabashed libidinous was exactly why I had chosen him in the first place. There was a certain comfort knowing he knew what to do, when I was clueless. But when I was near him, I was an incoherent, enamored mess. And I didn't trust myself not to completely abandon my inhibitions.

So, oh no, he could just stay next to his driver door. And I'd stand by mine. With a car between us, all doors locked but mine, and an easy escape route handy if he tried anything....And I wanted to let him.

"Okay,". He put his hands up in acquiescence and flashed a wolfish grin, as if he knew my thoughts. He seemed pleased; to be enjoying the fact that he obviously flustered me. Or maybe he enjoyed the challenge, the game; the cat and mouse. He leaned back against his car, casually, but I knew by his smile and the wicked glint in his eye, that this wasn't over. It said: He'd stay there....For now.

My skin felt heated. The wondering was making my skin feel flush, my heart race. Would he stay put like I asked, surprise me with his gentlemanly restraint? Or, would his lust consume him and propel him forward, to break the rules and move closer? Would he be shockingly gallant, fighting his deeply primal urges for the sake of my virtue, and keep space between us? Or would the fervid desire be so unbearably intense, that he could do nothing but break the distance and try to make a pass? It was absolutely tantalizing.

"So, what do you want to talk about? You, way over there," He asked. Good question. Biting my lip with the effort, I considered for a moment, and shrugged sheepishly. I was inept at small talk on an average day. Add overwhelming arousal and nerves jumbling all my thoughts together, and I didn't stand a chance. Before I could offer a topic, though, I was distracted, and saved, by a child's screech from somewhere nearby.

Looking in the direction of the sound, I saw a toddler in a small grove of trees in the near distance, running clumsily from his chaperone-playfully chasing him with arms outstretched like a monster-, squealing in delight. I smiled, tucking a wispy windblown ringlet of golden hair from out of my eyes. Then I turned back to Chase. And had to do a double-take.

He was no longer leaning against his driver's side door. He had moved. Closer. Much closer. He was standing at my passenger's side door. At my notice, he leered at me and his bright blue eyes flashed roguishly under a tousled mess of blond hair.

With just that one look and the wind-wafted scent of his delicious cologne, I felt tingles in places foreign to me; deep, unexplored places. A flushed, cheek-hurting, giddy smile turned up my lips reflexively. I felt momentarily stunned. My legs felt loose and wobbly.

I pressed a hand against the car door for support, hoping he didn't notice. I was utterly disarmed by his presence. And I realized, with absolute certainty, in that moment, that keeping him at a distance had undoubtedly more to do with keeping myself in check than him.

My body reacted to his scent automatically, void of all thought and reason. It thrummed with a new wave of heat that spread from my cheeks, downward. My palms were starting to feel damp despite the mild weather. I was feeling completely unlike myself. But despite all that, I hadn't completely lost my sanity. And I quickly regained some composure.

I raised a brow at him, reproving, flirtatious. Smiling, I shook my head. He thought he was so smooth. I snickered. Pointedly, I shifted closer to my door handle, adding just a fraction more space between us. My keys-having never left my hand-jangled quietly with the movement. He heard them.

"You're still holding your keys?" He asked, a brow raised beneath a wavy mess of hair that fluttered gently in the breeze again. It had been an unconscious action, just habit, but with another cheek-hurting smile, I nodded, replying,

"And all doors are locked except for mine. You could be a serial killer, ya know?" I pointed out, jesting.

"Not today," He jested back-or at least I was hoping he was-cocking his head with a grin. And I swear the arctic-blue in his eyes blazed brighter for a moment. It probably said terrible things about me that I was actually enjoying this. And what did I even say back to him? But I didn't have to think of something witty. Because a group of rowdy cyclists passing by us, presumably back to their vehicles, stole my attention.

In fact, I realized as I looked around, that it appeared many people were, like the cyclists, packing up and heading back to their vehicles. I lifted my chin toward the sky. Despite it not seeming that long, the clear blue sky from our arrival, was now mixed with moody, fiery shades on the horizon; sunset was starting, already. The park's curfew. The lake parking lot would be gated shut soon, for the night. Where had the time gone?

"The lake is closing," I told him. "We have to go soon".

"We could stay," He tried.

"Yeah, if you wanna be stuck here all night," I told him, sweeping away a breeze-blown hair from my face. He gave me a playful look. It said he'd have no problem with that, that we'd find plenty of...Fun things to do. I continued,

"And some of us have to be at work in the morning". I tried to ignore the heat I felt at the erotic possibilities of us, stuck alone together for the night. My cheeks were gonna hurt the next day. I just knew it. I couldn't remember the last time I smiled-or tried to hold in a smile-so much. Then a thought hit me, "Or murder me in the woods!," I gasped theatrically. He smirked.

"We could go somewhere else," He offered.

"Like where?" I was only comfortable being with him in a public place since this was our first in-person meeting. And besides the lake, residences, and run-down automotive shops-and the award-winning ice cream place that would be closing soon as well-there wasn't much in the immediate vicinity. Surrounding the lake was mostly long, winding back town roads that stretched on for several miles; quiet and pitch dark at night. He deliberated for a moment, considering our options.

"I passed by a Dunkins on the way here," He offered. I had forgotten about it. I hadn't been in the area for a while, since I'd moved, and I had driven a different route to the lake. But he was right. From the other direction, there was a Dunkin Donuts, just after the small traffic circle.

I contemplated for a moment. Because it was a small city, it would be open late and there would always be people-if not only the employees-there. And we had slim options. He added, insisting,

"My treat". I had to admit that our visit had seemed short, over too fast. And I wasn't ready to part just yet.

"Okay, I like a French Vanilla, decaf iced coffee extra extra. I'll see you there". And with that, I pulled open my car door, got in, and rolled out of the parking lot, leaving him to chase after. There was a vehicle with a circular seal on its door, side-lined by the gate on the way out; a park official waiting to lock the gate at closing.

In the Dunkin Donuts parking lot, Chase pulled into the empty spot beside my parked car just a moment after I cut the engine. He got out. He had a leather wallet in one hand.

"Okay, I'll be right back. One French Vanilla, decaf iced coffee extra extra, coming right up". My jaw fell, leaving my mouth open in a wide O. He gave me a triumphant, self-satisfied smirk. I wanted to make the order a challenge-though to me it was second-nature-and I'd highly doubted that he'd remember it as soon as I'd finished saying it.

But he had. And I was very impressed. And with that, he sauntered across the parking lot and through the glass restaurant door-with the signature orange D handle- disappearing through it, and leaving me standing impressed speechless by our cars.

There weren't many other patrons, so it didn't take him long to return. A couple of minutes tops, and Chase was pushing out of the restaurant door and heading back my way, two iced drinks and two papered straws in hand. He stopped suddenly a few feet away. I watched him curiously, wondering what he was doing; why he had stopped.

"So, can I hand you your drink?" He asked with a crooked grin. "Or do I have to leave it on your trunk and back away slowly with my hands in the air where you can see them?" He teased, holding his hands up in the air-drinks still in them-theatrically. Trying, and failing to stifle a smirk, I rolled my eyes and reached for my drink; an invitation to come closer. Though as he approached, I started to feel nervous and second-guess my decision.

He handed me my drink and one of the unopened straws. I peeled it open, slid it through the clear, plastic cover, and took a big swig. It was perfectly made. Yum.

"Thank you," I looked up through my lashes and flashed an appreciative smile. It was harder to breathe, again,now that he was so close. There was an invisible, irresistible force around him, bewitching and ensnaring me. I was helpless against it. And the closer he got, the stronger its compulsion.

His delicious cologne seduced my senses afloat the light breeze. Add that strong, square jawline, stubble, and piercing icy blue eyes, it was utterly unfair. I blinked a couple of times, trying, and failing to grasp some coherent thought. I was swooning. And by the smug look he had, I knew it was written all over my face. This was embarrassing. What was wrong with me?

"How is it?" He inched a fraction closer, leaning in toward me. By his tone, I wasn't entirely sure he was really talking about the coffee. His face felt so close. My breath hitched. My heart practically stopped. The heat along my skin was somehow burning hotter. I stumbled a step back.

"I..It..It's," No. Coherent. Thoughts. What was his question? Dear God I was in trouble. This is exactly why I'd made him stay a car's width apart. He inched even closer. I wanted so badly to reach up and trace his jawline, to tease the tips of his tousled mop of hair. I shivered.

"Are you cold?" He asked, setting his drink on the roof of my car. He unzipped his black hoodie. The movement teased up his t-shirt underneath, revealing the hard, defined indentation of his hip line. Leaning even closer-I could practically touch the skin of his collarbone with my lips, parted in surprise-he draped it over my shoulders.

He stood, hovering over me. I tipped my chin up to look up at him. His eyes suddenly burned with intensity, hunger. I stood frozen, captivated, nearly breathless, by his stare. Time and gravity seemed to no longer exist. Just he alone held me to the spot at that moment; his own personal magnetic pull. I felt energized and faint simultaneously. What was happening to me? I never felt like this around anyone before. Ever. Never felt like this before. Period.

Chase leaned down, pausing an inch or two away, to gauge my reaction. When I didn't object, he pressed his lips to mine, parting them. My lips locked together with his. I nearly dropped my drink. I had forgotten I was even holding it. His lips were soft and he smelled. So. Damn. Good. My heat spread through me, making me feel feverish.

He pulled back for a moment, gauging again. I stared back at him feeling my eyes wide, my lips left parted in surprise. My chest heaved.. I felt flush, faint. My whole body felt loose, causing me to stumble back a step, unsteady on my feet. He raised a teasing eyebrow, looking proud of himself, and leaned his face down to mine again.

This time he didn't gauge, he didn't wait for an invitation. He turned his body, guiding me backwards, until my back was against my car door. His front-hard and rippled- was pressed right up against mine. And though we had clothes on, I had never felt more naked and wanting in my life.

He palmed the car on either side of my head-the knobs of his muscular shoulders stretched the taut fabric of his t-shirt- barring me in. There was no way I could stumble or fall now. Not with him holding me in place.

His kiss was hard this time; more demanding, more hungry, more passionate. I got lost in the moment, the pulsing waves of new sensations rushing through me. I felt feverish, exhilarated. I responded, timidly-I was inexperienced and nervous-, but passionately. I cupped his cheek with one hand and fisted his hair with my other.

One of his hands, warm and smooth, traced along my jawline, trailing down to my collarbone. The skin slightly buzzed where he'd touched. His fingers were a pleasantly warm contrast to the cooling evening air. I let out an involuntary moan. And tensed, suddenly dying of embarrassment. He pulled away, just a fraction. His eyes blazed with desire. He liked that I moaned, I realized. Relieved. Feeling a sense of power. His response fueled me, only made me feel wanting, desperate for more.

As if reading my thoughts, he leaned in for another kiss. He shifted in his spot and the movement caused the waist of his jeans to graze the accidentally exposed flesh of my stomach. My breath caught. Something new was happening. A liquid heat deep down between my legs.

Chase had one hand still cupping my face. The other was roaming, tracing, down my collar bone, down my shirt, over my breasts-I shivered, moaned quietly-, stopping when he reached the hem of my shirt. His fingers brushed the bare flesh of my stomach. And traveled upward. Slowly. Painfully slowly, teasing. Goosebumps. My breath was coming in ragged, wanting, nervous heaves. His touch felt incredible.I didn't stop him. I didn't want to.

He didn't stop.

He continued letting his hand wander further up. My shirt fabric tugged gently against my skin as he did, creating more pleasurable thrums of sensation along my aroused flesh. His hand palmed my breast. Suddenly, I broke the kiss. He looked at me questioningly, wondering if he'd gone too far. I gave him a sheepish grin. It wasn't that I didn't enjoy it. Clearly I was enjoying it. I was overwhelmed, startled by how overcome with the bombardment of sensation I was experiencing. The feelings and sensations were more potent and intense than anything I had ever felt before.

Before I could explain, a faint buzzing noise from my pant's pocket caught my attention. Hyper-aroused, I jumped in surprise. It was my phone. I slid my hand in my pocket, feeling him watch me. He made no advances as I did. A friend had texted me. I resolved to respond to her later, then noticed the time. It was getting late.

A look around us confirmed it. I hadn't even noticed, so absorbed in him and our activities, that the sun had set and the amber streetlights were on, dimly lighting up the dark, basically empty parking lot. We were the only two outside. And only one or two workers could be seen puttering around inside the restaurant, clearly oblivious to us and our passionate tryst. Thank God.

"It's getting late," My voice sounded breathless, a tad hoarse, almost unfamiliar. He didn't move. I looked up at him. "I should go", I insisted. And I meant it. That was enough excitement for one night. Everything in me was overdrive. And I didn't think I could take it anymore.

One more quiet moment, and he reletend, palming my cheeks in his hands and stealing one last quick peck on the lips. When he pulled away, pulling my car door open as he did,-his large shoulders bulging as he did-I noticed his chest heaving. He had been breathing just as hard as I was. I felt triumph knowing I caused it.

He motioned with his free arm, inviting me to climb in my seat. I did, feeling light and clumsy. None of my limbs were working properly. Was I safe to drive?