Caring for Cara

I

A wave of panic hit her once more, and Cara let out a heaving sob. Her chest felt like it was being squeezed in a vice, and she couldn't breathe. The attack tore through her like a fire, and the tears poured down her cheeks as she hugged herself, rocking back and forth on her bed. Shaking, her hands reached for her pill bottle, and she managed to swallow a Xanax before the next surge knocked the breath out of her again.

Somewhere, outside of her buzzing and pounding head, she heard her phone ring. Looking down, she saw David's name on the caller ID. Cara shook her head and turned off the ringing. She didn't want him to see her like this. She wasn't sure if he could handle this side of her - the debilitating anxiety, the crushing panic. He knew about it, of course, but knowing about it and seeing her in the throes of a panic attack were two different things. How could she explain? How could she tell him that their relationship was a big reason for her panic? That she was terrified of being hurt again? Terrified of once more feeling broken and discarded?

Cara was still hyperventilating when her phone rang again. And again. And again. It was still ringing when the medicine took hold of her and she drifted off into a fitful sleep.

She didn't know how long she had been asleep when, through her haze, she heard her front door opening, and Sophie started barking. She began to stir at the noise when footsteps slowly approached and she felt the bed shift as someone sat down on it. Suddenly, a hand gently came to rest on her shoulder. Startled, she sat up and was baffled to see David sitting next to her.

"Wha—What are you doing here? How did you get in?" Cara was mortified that he was seeing her like this. Her hair was a mess, her eyes felt red and puffy from all of her crying, and her clothes were disheveled.

"You gave me a key, remember? I couldn't reach you all day and I got worried. I just wanted to make sure you're ok," he said softly, raising a hand to her face and tucking her hair behind her ear.

"Oh, yeah, right. Yeah, I'm fine. I must have just dozed off," Cara mumbled.

"Are you sure? You look like you've been crying." He looked at her with concern in his eyes.

"No, I...I'm good." She inadvertently glanced down at the pill bottle still on the bed and his eyes followed her gaze. Cara tried to grab it, but he was faster. He looked down and raised an eyebrow.

"Xanax?"

Cara reached for the bottle again, but he held it away from her.

"What happened, Cara?

"I just...had a panic attack, is all," she managed to say. "It's no big deal."

"Why didn't you call me?"

"I...I just didn't want to bother you. You don't need to deal with that."

David leaned over and hugged her close. "You should have called me. I want to help, if I can."

Cara shrugged. "I'm kind of tired. Can we talk about this another time?"

David looked at her, but Cara couldn't tell what he was thinking. All of a sudden, he stood up. "I'll be right back." She watched him leave the room, and lay back on the bed, curled up in a ball, wishing she was alone. She heard water running in the bathroom, but the sounds faded as she dozed off again.

She was woken by David once again. "Come with me, Cara."

Cara groaned. David leaned over and gathered her in his arms, then picked her up and carried her towards the bathroom. Exhausted, Cara sank into his arms, her head on his chest. When they entered the room, Cara's eyes widened in surprise. She could see that David had filled the bathtub with water and added some of the bubble bath she had under the sink.

"What did you do?" Cara asked, dazed.

David sat her down on the closed toilet and began undressing her.

"Just want to make you feel a little better. A bath will help," David said, quietly, as he folded her clothes and put them on the counter. "Now, get in. It's all yours." He smiled softly.

"Can...can you take a bath with me?" Cara looked down at her hands. He was being so sweet, all of a sudden, she didn't want him to leave.

David smiled wider. "Sure, no problem." He quickly stripped, then stepped into the tub and sat down, his back leaning against one end, and extended his arms for her to join him. She followed, then sat back against him and sighed, deeply, closing her eyes and resting her head on his chest.

"Thank you," she whispered. "This is nice."

She felt David's arms around her body, hugging her close to him, and his lips on her head and cheek. Grabbing a washcloth, he poured a little bit of body wash on it, and proceeded to gently wash her. Starting with her arms, he moved to her breasts, spending extra time running the washcloth over her nipples, causing Cara to sharply inhale at the sensation. Agonizingly slowly, he moved down to her stomach, then pushed Cara to sit up as he softly washed her back. Cara felt tears streaming down her face, the care he was taking with her body overwhelming her. As she drew a ragged breath, David's head snapped down to look at her.

"What's wrong? Why are you crying?" he asked with concern.

Cara shook her head. "I just don't remember the last time someone did something so nice for me," she said with a sob.

David reached around to put a hand on her chin and turned her face toward him, showering her with light kisses, his mouth wiping off her tears. Again, Cara sighed and leaned back to put her head on his chest. Moving her with him, David sat up and raised one of Cara's legs, washing down and back up, then switching to her other leg. Cara gasped as he shifted his attention to her mound, running his fingers through her bush, and gently dragging the cloth up her lips and over her clit. He chuckled lightly as she squirmed under his touch.

"All clean!" he exclaimed, when he completed his thorough trip over every inch of her body. A small smile flickered over Cara's face at his enthusiasm. "Want to get out?"

Cara nodded. David once again leaned her forward and climbed out, quickly drying himself with a small towel. Pulling her bath sheet off the towel bar, he held it open, and Cara carefully rose to her shaky feet and stepped out of the tub into his arms. Hugging her in the towel, he took the same care in drying her as he did in washing her, making sure to cover all of her body, lingering on the most sensitive areas, eliciting more soft gasps from Cara.

Hanging up her towel, he swept her back up in his arms and carried her into the bedroom, carefully placing her down onto the bed. Crawling up, he lay down behind her, wrapping his arms around her and pulling the covers over them.

Cara huddled back against him, feeling safe and somewhat peaceful for the first time that day. She marveled at the effect he had on her. She felt more at home in his arms than she felt anywhere else.

"Are you ready to talk?" he whispered into her ear.

Cara swallowed hard. "I don't know...This was so sweet of you, but I just...You don't need to deal with my shit."

David turned her around to face him and gave her a soft kiss. "Please don't do this. Don't shut me out. I know I've fucked up and hurt you before, but I love you, and I want to help. I'm not going to be like those other guys, ok? I want to know what's bothering you."

Cara's head swirled with contradictory thoughts. She wanted so badly for him to be the one she could share everything with, the one who wouldn't betray her. But the fear still gripped her. She feared telling him something that would scare him and drive him off, she feared sharing her insecurities and showing him what a mess she actually was.

Looking up, she saw the earnest look in his eyes, a flash of that same emotion she had seen in his eyes the first time they had sex. The warmth he radiated melted her resistance. She took a deep breath and opened the floodgates. She shared everything that was on her mind, all of the panic she felt at the thought of falling in love with someone new and allowing herself to be hurt all over again. And, most of all, the terror of trusting someone and finding that trust broken once again. She wasn't sure she would be able to pick up the pieces after being shattered once more.

David's eyes never left her face as he listened intently. Every time she looked down to avoid the strength of his gaze, ashamed of everything she was saying, he would tilt her chin back up, forcing her to look at him. Every once in a while, he would brush the tears off of her cheeks. Cara didn't know how long she talked, unburdening herself of all of her fears.

"Please, don't do that to me. Please," she begged through her sobs. "If you think it might happen, please just leave right now. I can't handle that again." She pushed away from him and curled back up in a ball, the panic starting to rip through her again. She started to turn away again, but he wouldn't let her. He put his hand back up to her cheek.

"Just listen to me. I don't think there's anything I could say to take away all of your fears. I can only keep earning your trust. I'm not perfect, and I'm going to make mistakes. But I promise, I love you, and I could never live with myself if I hurt you like they did. And next time you're feeling like this, I want you to pick up the phone and call me, ok? Because, no matter what, I'm not going anywhere."

Cara nodded.

"Promise me."

"Are you sure?" Cara whispered, her voice hoarse from crying.

"Promise me."

"I promise," Cara said softly. She leaned forward and pressed her lips against David's, pulling him in for a gentle but deep kiss. "Thank you."

David ran his hand up and down her arm, lightly stroking her, while she calmed down again, wiping off her tears. When her tears were dry and her breathing returned to normal, he sat up. "I'm going to go and let you get some sleep. But I'll call you tomorrow to check on you, ok?"

He moved to get off the bed. Cara grabbed his arm, keeping him next to her.

"Wait. Please don't go. You've been so amazing to me tonight."

Pulling David back down to her, she kissed him, her tongue pushing through his lips. Her hands moved down to his ass. David lifted them off and moved away.

"You don't have to do this just because I did something nice. You don't owe me anything."

"I'm aware of that. But I want to."

Cara firmly replaced her hands on him, squeezing his ass and grinding against him with her hips.

"You've had a rough day. You should get some rest," he managed through his moans.

Cara smiled. She could tell his resistance was quickly breaking down. She moved one of her hands to the back of his head, pushing him toward her for another kiss. This time, his tongue met hers, and they moved together, dancing between their mouths. Lying back down, she rolled onto her back, taking him with her. She spread her legs to make room for him and sighed as he settled on top of her. Supporting himself on one forearm, he lifted his other hand to sweep some hair from her face, and she closed her eyes and moaned quietly as he ran his hand down her face, her neck, and to her breast. She felt overcome with a sense of tranquility as he continued to touch her so gently, sprinkling kisses all over her face and down her neck. The warmth of his touch burned through her, settling in her core, and she felt the familiar rush of wetness. The feeling of safety she had experienced earlier in his arms returned, and she knew there was nowhere else she would rather be right then.

All of a sudden, she felt desperate to have him inside of her. She wanted to pull him in completely, to melt into him. Reaching down between them, she wrapped her hand around his cock, already throbbing and erect, and eliciting a gasp from him.

"Make love to me. Right now. Please..." she whispered in his ear, surprised at the need and strain in her voice. The emotions that had coursed through her throughout the day had taken their toll, and her body was crying out for a release.

Her words made David moan, and he swiftly moved his cock to her slit, and he entered her an inch, then stopped. Before Cara could beg him to continue, he began moving again, sliding inside of her with torturous slowness. Cara groaned at the feeling of delightful fullness when he was finally buried to the hilt, and she rested her feet high up on his back, lifting her hips up to him.

David began circling his hips, moving his dick just slightly inside of her and grinding his pubic bone against her clit. He must have sensed her need, because he didn't let up until Cara stiffened under him and let out a strangled whimper as the delicious climax swept through her, taking her panic and fears with it. When she came down, she noticed David had stopped his movements.

"You ok?" he asked.

Cara looked up at him and smiled, her eyelids still heavy with lust. "I'm wonderful. Don't stop."

David leaned down to give her a passionate kiss and started to move in her again, taking his time. Their mouths stayed pressed against each other as they made languorous love, and it seemed to Cara that, as they moved together in perfect harmony, they melded together into one. The room was silent except for the moans that escaped from their lips through the kiss, neither of them willing to break the connection. She had no idea how long they stayed like that, gently rocking as a single being. She had never felt more complete than she did at that moment. When she could feel another orgasm starting to build, she finally pulled her lips from his.

"I...love...you..." she managed to gasp out before the wave crashed over her again. Through the haze, she could hear a loud moan as David came, and the feeling of his cock throbbing in her caused her to be hit with another rush of exquisite pleasure. When she finally opened her eyes, David was looking at her with a smile on his face.

"I love you, too," he said.

Cara laughed softly. "That was wonderful."

David rested his head on her chest, and Cara ran her hands up and down his back and through his hair. She relished the feeling of him on top of her, and sighed with contentment.

"Can you stay?" Cara asked.

"Mm-hmm," he answered.

"Stay forever..."

David smiled. "I'd love to."

II

Cara could see the lust burning in his eyes as soon as she opened the door to her apartment. Stepping inside and roughly pushing her against the wall, Sophie barking at his feet, he kissed her, his tongue forcefully probing her mouth. He lifted her arms above her head and began kissing and biting her neck, hard, making Cara moan with pleasure, her pussy feeling the familiar tingle.

"You're mine tonight," he growled in her ear and Cara felt her knees getting weak as he led her inside. Making his way into her bedroom, he threw her on the bed, keeping her ass up and facing him. Throwing her skirt up onto her back, he used one finger to rip off her already sopping wet panties, while he used his other hand to unzip his fly and release his throbbing hard dick. He gave her no warning before he rammed himself inside of her, burying his cock to the hilt. She screamed as a delicious pain burst through her. She had no time for the feeling to subside, however, because David was ramming his cock into her with all the force he could muster, grunting like an animal.

The sounds he was making were driving Cara wild, and her pussy was on fire. All of a sudden, she felt his hands in her hair, roughly pulling her head back, and a slap on her ass. She was shocked that David was being so rough. She'd never told him how much she liked that.

"Oh, fuck yes!" she yelled, prompting him to bring his hand down on her ass again. She felt her knees might buckle under her from the intensity, but she summoned her strength and pushed back against his brutal thrusting.

"You like me fucking you like that, huh?" he demanded. "You like being my fucking slut?"

Cara couldn't believe what had come over him. She had never seen him like this. And it was fucking hot.

"Shit, yes, keep fucking me!" she begged.

"Say please, or I'll stop."

"Fuck, please! Please! Don't stop!"

Her moans turned into screams as she felt every nerve in her body tingling with pain and pleasure. So, when David reached around her and began rubbing and fingering her clit, it immediately sent her over the top. With a shriek, she felt her whole body shaking with the electricity of her orgasm, her writhing making it difficult for David to keep up his pace. He had an iron grip on her, however, and continued thrusting, until with a final growl in Cara's ear, his dick exploded inside of her, coating her pussy walls with his cum. He collapsed on top of her, as Cara's orgasm began to fade, and he gasped as her pussy continued to clamp down on his now sensitive dick.

When he caught his breath, he pulled out and sat next to her on the bed. "Was that ok? I didn't hurt you or offend you, did I?"

"When, when you called me your slut?" she asked, with a wry smile.

He looked down sheepishly. "Well, that, and how rough I was being."

"David, you're so good to me. You make me feel like the most amazing woman in the world. I know how you feel about me, so no, I don't mind being your slut in the bedroom. This was absolutely incredible. It makes me so turned on that you wanted me that much."

He sighed with relief. "I just needed you so bad, I couldn't stop myself. I couldn't even think straight. I'm not sure I really knew what I was doing until after. I was so worried you'd be upset."

"Let me show you how I feel," she said, her eyes sparkling with excitement. "But first..." she reached up and removed her shirt and bra, then her skirt. Reaching over, she undressed him, as well. Then, now naked, she positioned herself lying down on the bed, her head hanging over the edge.

"I want you to fuck my mouth. Use me like your fucking slut."

His jaw dropped as she said that.

"Come here, let me help you with that," she purred, wrapping her hand around his cock and pulling him toward her. His dick began rapidly inflating as she started moving her hand up and down on it, then positioned him in front of her face and started flicking his swelling head with her tongue.

David gasped and bucked his hips. Slowly, Cara drew him into her mouth, suppressing her gag reflex, to allow all of him in, until he was buried to his hilt.

"Fuck, this is so hot, Cara," David groaned, as he slowly began to move his cock in and out.

Putting on a show for him, Cara moved one hand down to her breast, pulling on and flicking at her nipple, her other hand to her clit, where she began to pleasure herself. Her moans reverberated through David's dick as it sat in her mouth.

David's eyes widened as he saw what she was doing, his breaths coming faster and faster. Hearing his arousal, Cara moved the hand that was on her tit to his balls, massaging them as he stroked in and out of her mouth.

"Oh, shit! This is fucking amazing," David croaked. In response, Cara moved her fingers off of her clit and slid two into herself, fucking herself with them, her moans growing louder. With that, David clearly couldn't control himself anymore. As Cara bucked her hips against her fingers, he began furiously face-fucking her, his hips slamming into her with every stroke.

Cara found the feeling of him in her mouth and her fingers in her pussy to be incredibly erotic and the abandon with which David was thrusting while he watched and listened to her made her feel fantastically sexy. It was a surprisingly short time until she felt the heat spreading through her and her entire body began to tremble. As the orgasm burned through her, her screams were muffled by David's cock.

Watching Cara come with his dick in her mouth must have been more than David could bear. He let out a guttural moan as his cock tensed and pumped hot cum down Cara's throat. Spent, he collapsed on top of her, while she continued softly sucking on him, cleaning him off. He groaned as she assaulted his now-deflated dick. When she was done, she gently rolled him off of her, so she could sit up. Dizziness hit her as the collected blood flooded out of her head, and she lay down next to him, both of them breathing heavily.