She brought me back to 1998. She was my queen. She was my guide to self-feminization. Over the past 10 years I went from a self-described panty-lover with some homosexual experimentation, mostly me on my knees giving oral to closeted homosexuals and/or sissies.
Now I am full-on secret sissy. I have a job, kids, and a real life as a man. I don't pursue relationships, with men or women, I am devoted to the sissy life. I masturbate, and that suffices my sex drive and embodies my sex life. She hasn't been part of my life for over 5 years, not in reality, but in my mind everything I do I imagine she is looking on, witnessing, and participating in my sissification. When I masturbate, her voice is in my ear, her eyes are looking at me, and her gentle touch encourages me.
Last week, she sent me an airline ticket to Portland, where she'd discovered a time portal back to 1998. In 1998 I was 27 and just out of a relationship. It was a traumatic loss when J left me. J was of the mind that everyone secretly imagined, if not fantasized, about being their gender opposite. J was the first woman with whom I'd shared my affinity for women's lingerie. She fostered this trait and we explored what it would be like if I were the woman and she the man.
I got on the flight to Portland not knowing that she'd be taking me back to 1998, I never would have gotten on the flight if she'd told me that's where/when we were going.
After going through the portal we drove down to my apartment in Long Beach. I say my apartment, but it was my apartment when I was 27. I'm 54 now, and showing up at my younger self's apartment on a sunny Saturday morning felt a little like knocking on the door of a complete stranger.
She, A I'll call her, had already acquainted herself with my younger self. She knew all about my life and my past and she knew that I'd been struggling to recover from my newly-found single status. Working long hours, going home and dressing up in panties, and then falling asleep after masturbating. She met him at the local pub I used to frequent. She knew precisely how to seduce me/him (my younger self). The second time she met him at the pub, they'd gone to his apartment.
He (I, my younger self) revealed everything to her with minimal effort on her part. She only had to show interest, and he gave himself to her. I understood this because when A and I met in my timeline, I was 44 and gave myself to her without reserve. Within a year of meeting her I was depilating my body, painting my nails, doing makeup, I'd bought a wig, heels, and making short videos of myself for her. I even sucked cock for her.
So, I knew how powerful she was and knew that she would wield her powers on my younger, much more vulnerable self with efficiency and precision. He (me, my younger self) had sucked her futa cock on that first night they'd gone to his apartment.
When A crosses through the time portal she is transformed into a futa with a long and gorgeous cut cock with a full smooth scrotum that is fully functional in all manner of ways.
I was a natural submissive, even at 27, when I considered myself all man. Even with all the experimentation I'd done with J, I never would have considered sucking a real cock, that didn't come until I was in my late 30s. But A's womanly body, her beautiful ass, her shapely legs, her full breasts, and her cold eyes accompanied by her glorious cock and balls were no match for my masculine veneer.
When they arrived at my apartment that first night, she told him to get into his favorite outfit and wait for her in his/my bed. She went to his bathroom, found his Leg Show magazine collection and the two editions wherein he'd published two stories, and readied herself. She wore a long sheer night gown, a pair of Vanity Fair sheer nylon/polyester full-bottom, white panties, and a pair of Saint Laurent satin black heels. The shape of her body and the way her gown draped over her curvy body hid her panty bulge but only long enough for me/my younger self to take her in.
I/he was lying in my/his bed, covered by a big goose down comforter that hid my satin pink chemise, open-bottom satin girdle, pink Vanity Fair panties, and Wolford thigh-high stockings. When she entered his room, she stood and watched him. She didn't speak. She used her fingers to sway her long, double-slitted gown before her, and she watched him until the silence was too much for him to bear. When he tried to speak, she simply shook her head slowly back and forth until he stopped.
She shifted her gown slowly back and forth in front of her, allowing slight glimpses of her panties. She was a statue of silk, satin, and power. He took all of her in from her burgundy painted nails, her satin black heels, her full matching burgundy lipstick, and her eyes. He tried, fruitlessly, to avoid her panties, but it soon became the sole focus of his attention. She lifted her gown until she exposed herself to him, and she stood before him, her now bulging Vanity Fairs and tanned, shapely legs were framed by the hanging, silky gown that fell along her backside. It was then that he realized what he was looking at. Her panty bulge was exquisitely sexy and altogether feminine. Spontaneously, he threw off his covers and crawled on his knees over his bed and lay on his stomach before her.
A had told me this and all of their other exploits on the drive down the California coast. She also prepared me for my introduction to my younger self. She groomed me into a maternal, mature femme. Going through the time portal had affected my body as well. My hips widened, my cock and balls grew, and I blossomed a pair of D's with stiff pink nipples. My face was rounded, and my hair on my body disappeared. My hair on my head grew long with soft, lazy curls, and my eyebrows reshaped to fit my feminine features. I was a big, mature tranny shemale that A ensured conveyed confidence and power, rather than drag queen and trashy. My cock had grown significantly and I could suck it in the sitting position. A forced me to suckle on myself the whole time we drove down the coast. She enjoyed watching me casually suckling myself in the passenger seat, giving all passing vehicles and their occupants a show.