This is the first of three chapters detailing the sexual awakening of Ann. Through the story, we see where Ann's upbringing caused her conflict. A chance encounter highlighted her need to change.
This is about a good marriage beset by poor communication and how it shook itself almost apart before finding themselves together.
There is no adultery, no swapping.
As Ann pulled into her street, her mind dwelled on what she planned to do. The last few weeks with her husband David had been fraught and she knew she was responsible for that. Instead of confiding in him as she knew she should have and as he had always told her to when there was a problem, she hadn't. Her main character flaw was when a problem was so deeply personal, she would retreat into herself to try and find the reasons and solutions. This had meant she hadn't been open with him and she knew he resented the way she had been avoiding him.
She was home early so she could prepare herself. She had resolved to dress in a way she had never done for him with some very sexy lingerie underneath. David had often asked her to do something like this and she hoped this would both tease and excite him. It scared her to death. Tonight, she meant to explain everything about the last four weeks to him and what she had discovered which would hopefully improve their future.
He was her one love and she needed to show him that.
She was jolted from her introspection when she saw David's car in the driveway. He always put it in the garage! Why was it there? He hadn't mentioned finishing early today. As she took this in, her subconscious reminded her the last few days had been even more strained for some reason. She had caught him looking suspiciously at her quite a few times. He would look away quickly, but not before she caught flashes of anger in his eyes. She knew she should have asked him what was wrong, but she was so wrapped up in her own thoughts.
She grabbed her briefcase and handbag and headed into the house. She stopped just a few steps into the hallway. David was there but heading out. Her arrival obviously surprised David. His facial expression showed he was very unhappy. His eyes held hers and she could see the fury within, directed at her. He had a case in his hand.
"David, what is going on? Are you going on a trip? You haven't mentioned anything like that to me," Ann asked doubtfully.
Her mind was reeling. Had that sewer rat Brian Mulholland really gone ahead and told David they were having an affair? That was the only reason she could think of for the look in David's eyes. The case, he was leaving her!
Ann's heart rate and blood pressure were going through the roof. She was bloody angry. At David for believing that arsehole but even more at herself for not speaking with David sooner!
When she spoke, the anger was evident in her tone. Her eyes blazing as she held his stare.
"David, I have loved you and only you since we first met over eighteen years ago. I have never thought to question your love for me or your trust in me until now. The fact that you have packed and are leaving indicates that you believe what that lowlife Brian Mulholland has said about the two of us.
"That fact alone hurts deeply," she said very sadly, with the hurt being very evident.
"I have never and could never even think about having an affair because I love you, only you.
"I'm home early because I was planning this evening to show you how much I love you by dressing in a way you have asked me to for years. For you to enjoy as I explained what has been going on, what has caused the recent rift between us. What I have learned and how I intend to make our future better. I still want to do that. All I'm asking for is your time to listen to me and I'll provide you proof that I'm not having an affair.
"I know I am responsible for your feelings of distrust because that low life said something which resonated in me. You know how I get when something is so deeply personal. The more personal the more I look inside myself when I should instead have come to you. I know I should have done that. I told myself repeatedly to do that, but I couldn't; I was so ashamed. For that omission I'm truly sorry.
"If you leave without allowing me to show you that I haven't had an affair, I don't know if we can rebuild what we will break. I'll still love you, but it would be very difficult to live with you knowing that you didn't trust me enough even to listen to me.
"The only time we have lied to each other since we first met was when we were planning surprises for the other, little white lies.
"Please stay, sit down and let me explain everything."
She concluded quietly and sadly, " If afterwards you still wish to leave, I won't stop you."
David heard her tone, her anger but what really scared him was when she said if he left, they could not rebuild what they had. He had been angry since he had been told about her affair. She was denying any such affair. He had always been sure she never would have one like he would never have one so why did he believe this story.
His mind was split. One part wished to leave, get the split over and done with but the other, still in love with Ann wanted to hear her. She had never done anything to cause him to have a moment of distrust until now so why not listen. What did he have to lose? A few minutes of his time. What should he do? Stay or go?
David finally nodded and went into the dining room where he sat down.
"Ann, you've correctly surmised what I have been told but it wasn't by him, it was by a person I had no reason to doubt. I would have dismissed this as I have never until this moment had any cause to doubt you. However, the last few weeks have been difficult, as though you were someplace else. With him, I'm now told.
"You say you can disprove all that. I want you too as I don't want to live with the pain I'm feeling now. I love you but I cannot stay if you have been unfaithful to me."
Ann saw the sadness within him and heard the pain in his voice.
"David, can you give me a few minutes to take off my coat and prepare my evidence? I was going to have it all ready to show you when you came home later."
David nodded. He was still in shock at what was going on. The reality of her having an affair was destroying him. He had never thought her capable of cheating on him. The fact his friend had struggled to tell him had hurt him so much. His friend was so sorry for him, he would never have believed it but? He hoped she would prove his friend wrong. But how close did she come to having one if she was with this person? He was trying to evaluate all that he had been told and what she said but he couldn't truly focus on it. He didn't want to lose Ann, but he couldn't live with her if she had even contemplated an affair.
His composure wasn't helped when Ann reappeared. Her recorder in hand and a business look on her face. His jaw dropped. Ann was topless. She had never done that before. He was shocked to say the least. Her all natural "38D's" awesomely pert breasts openly displayed to him. As he grasped that vision he realised anyone who walked down the street and looked in their window would see her.
He felt a stirring. He had always wanted her to do something like this, but she was too modest to do so.
Her face showed her concern about his reaction and perhaps even a bit of excitement. She was breathing quickly and trying to concentrate on what she had to do rather than deal with her embarrassment sitting there, topless. Her voice showed her conflict.
"David, I said earlier I had intended to explain, dressed to please you. This is not quite what I had in mind, but I think it shows you how seriously I am taking this opportunity to tell you the truth. I hoped this would grab your attention. I know you have always wanted me to do this. I'm way out of my comfort zone."
She took a few big breaths to control herself as she wanted to flee. Those didn't help David as her breasts bounced beautifully. Ann knew she had to get on with it or she would run.
"Now, this will be in two parts. If there is anything you don't understand or need explained, just interrupt me.
"The first part is about Brian Mulholland and my interactions with him. The second part is about what he said which reverberated with me. That part is the one I am truly sorry I did not speak to you about as it does concern us both, but I needed to examine myself very carefully. I know you have always told me to confide in you with my problems, but this was so personal, I feared your response."
David's eyes lit up with alarm, why should she fear his response? What was she thinking about, having an affair?
Ann saw his response and read his thoughts, "I said I had never had any thoughts about having an affair, so my fear wasn't about you reacting if I said I wanted one. I'll explain later. But for clarity, no affair, ever. You are the only man I have wanted since I met you and the only one, I want for the rest of my life!
"Brian Mulholland was at school with me. He was a year or two ahead. He paid interest in me when I began to develop my breasts. He tried to ask me out, but my senses told me he was trouble and only wanted to fuck me. He's glossy on the outside but inside he's a complete arsehole.
"I refused him, but he kept on at me, his eyes never leaving my breasts. One day in the cafeteria he tried again but wouldn't take no for an answer. He grabbed me but I slapped his face so hard it echoed around the room.
"He went for me but fortunately my brother's pal, Mark was there. He was already six foot seven and hauled Brian back. Brian's anger was evident. Mark told him to walk away as if he didn't, he would break every bone in his puny body. Brian was already off the ground in Mark's hands. Before he released him Mark told him if he bothered me again, Mark would find him.
"Brian left reluctantly swearing under his breath.
"I never heard from him again until just over four weeks ago. I was in the park having my lunch when he spotted me. I became aware of him as he towered over me. As you know, I always have my recorder with me in case I come up with an idea about what we are working on as I can be distracted so quickly. I switched it on. My subconscious must have known he was trouble as I didn't realise I had done that till I was back in my office.
"Basically, he asked how I was as he leered at my breasts. I told him I wanted nothing to do with him and he should walk away."
