All I Want for X-Mas Is My G Whiz

I received my very favorite Christmas present of all time that wonderful winter evening last December. It was a few days before the big event and I had just returned home from university for the holidays. Unfortunately, because of studying for examinations, I had not yet had much time for shopping.

My mother suggested I travel to the gigantic mall located in a large city a hundred miles away. Mother told me she got all her shopping done in one day at the place. I took her suggestion and headed for that mall early the next morning, despite the weatherman’s dire prediction of blizzard-like conditions.

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow. I didn’t care. My father suggested I take his brand new Lincoln Navigator with four-wheel drive and plenty of room for presents. Nobody but father had driven the two week new black beauty yet.

The Christmas spirit really began to affect me as I traipsed through the huge mall, selecting appropriate gifts for all my family and friends. I especially enjoyed playing in the toy stores. That sure brought back some fond childhood memories. I picked out a Chicken Dance Elmo for my favorite cousin’s little daughter. When Elmo squawked “Elmo wants to be a chicken! Elmo wants to be a duck!” I burst out laughing and all the other adults stared at me.

Returning home from the mall, I decided to take a short cut over back country roads my father had told me about. It had turned dark and snowed so hard I could only see a few feet in front of me. A deer suddenly jumped out on the road and I panicked and slammed on the brakes. Big mistake. I slid off the road, over an embankment and into a small ravine.

The Lincoln landed on its roof with the front pointed slightly upwards, which turned out to be a blessing. The air bag had deployed which prevented me from being injured but I could barely move. I couldn’t free myself and I couldn’t get to my cell phone in my purse on the passenger seat. The vehicle’s engine had shut off and I was pinned such that I couldn’t reach the key to attempt to start it, just to keep warm. While driving I had taken my coat off and opened the window slightly which seemed to keep the windows clearer, and cranked up the heater/defroster.

I sat there for what seemed to me to be hours just shivering. Hardly any other vehicles had been on this road and they couldn’t see me now anyway. I couldn’t move and I couldn’t summon help. Snow and wind blew in the open window. All seemed hopeless. I thought I just might freeze to death if my dire situation didn’t change for the better soon. Finally I got some sort of idea. The possibility anyone would see my signal seemed remote but I thought it just might be my only chance to be rescued. I could reach the headlight switch. I turned the lights on and alternated between high beams and low beams for a few minutes and then turned them off and then repeated the process over and over and over. Like I said, the nose of the Lincoln did point up in the air. I did this for what must have been hours as the headlights got dimmer and dimmer until there was no juice left. I started to pray.

Oh my God! I saw lights. I saw another vehicle approaching. It got fairly close. Not a car. It looked like some sort of ATV. The driver got off and came up to my window and spoke. “Not to worry, lady, I’ll get you out of there. But first, do you think you’re injured?” Sweet music to my ears let me tell you, a human voice other than my own. I had feared I might never hear one again.

“No, no, nothing hurts. But I’m freezing in here. I might have frostbite.”

He forced open the door and deflated the air bag and cut the seat belt with a knife. But I still was upside down. “Okay, miss, now move your arms and legs and let’s make sure there is no reason I should summon emergency medical personnel instead of just yanking you out of there.”

“Pull me out! It will take forever for them to get here. I’m not hurt. I need to get warm. God, I’m so cold!”

“Yes, I would imagine. But you’ll be fine soon.”

He began to gently inch me out of the Lincoln and I was out and standing on my feet in ten minutes. But not for long. I fainted but only momentarily. He picked me up and carried me in his arms to the ATV. After wrapping me in a blanket he put me behind him. “Now, you have to hang on to me,” he advised. “We’ll be someplace warm real quick.” I hung on for dear life.

It seemed like forever but I’m sure it took only about twenty minutes until we entered a house and he carried me into a large den with a wood burning stove right in the middle of it. Logs burning brightly. Heat! Hallelujah! He put me upright up again. I could stand this time.

“Okay, miss, take off your clothes.”

“What?”

“Your clothes. Remove them.”

“Why? Are you a doctor or something? Are you going to examine me?”

“Miss, your clothes are cold and wet. I’m going to get you a sleeping bag. You get in that and sit or lay by the fire and you’ll warm up. As a matter of fact, I am a doctor…an intern at a hospital in San Francisco. This is my parent’s home. I’m spending the holidays with them. I won’t examine you unless you want me to. Perhaps I will have a look at your hands and feet to check for frostbite. But first, get warm. Now, I’m going to get the bag. You take your clothing off and cover up with the blanket. I’ll throw your stuff in the dryer. Are we communicating effectively?”

“Yes, sir, doctor, sir.” I laughed lightly and began to feel a little better. And my, the doctor was good looking once he took off the stocking hat and scarf.

Soon I lay naked in the sleeping bag by the fire, but I still shivered and he noticed. “I have another suggestion,” he offered.

“Cook me in the fire?” I jested. He laughed. Delightful smile. And those eyes!

“What about a drink? Cocoa or tea or something?”

“How about a shot of Jack Daniels?” I responded. That’s what my father drank but I hated the stuff.

“How about a small glass of wine?” he countered.

“That would be nice.”

“Be right back. Something to eat? I could make you a sandwich or something.” I shook my head indicating no thank you. “Are you a student at PUMA university?” he asked with a smirk as he picked up my sweatshirt, black bra and panties and other clothing. “The sweatshirt with the logo.”

“Close on the PUMA. My school also has four letters and starts with a P.”

“That would have been my first guess. I saw the bumper sticker on your vehicle.”

“My father put that on. You don’t really think I can afford a Lincoln Navigator, do you? Daddy is one of those fanatic alumni.”

“And black underwear? Surprise, surprise.”

“I bet you wear pink boxer shorts.”

“Only because I washed the boxers with my red sweater. Let me get you your beverage, young lady, before you accuse me of being a child molester.”

He soon brought a bottle and two glasses. “This is an Argentine wine, specifically 2001 Catena Chardonnay. Crisp and fresh, with pear and apple aromas.” He handed me a half full glass. “I suppose perhaps we should make a toast. But first, I’m Mark.”

“I’m Annie. Well, actually, the name on my birth certificate is Annebelle. That was my great-grandmother’s name and I got stuck with it too. No one calls me Annebelle because I hurt them if they do. Old Annebelle, the name suited her, called me Annebelle but she’s with the angels now, rest her soul. Quite a lady. She taught me how to knit and crochet when I was a kid.”

“Here’s to your good heath, Annebelle.” I gave him a dirty look. “And no more accidents, ‘eh, Annie?” We clicked glasses lightly and I tasted the wine.

“This is excellent, funny guy, but I’m not legally old enough to drink alcohol in this state. Almost, but not quite. You are contributing to the delinquency of a minor, doctor! I’ll reserve judgment on the child molester charge.” I winked playfully.

“Heaven forbid! But as a physician I do sometimes advocate treatment that is considered illegal and/or unethical by some. For example, prescribing marijuana for terminally ill cancer patients. If you are almost old enough to drink, then I am about five years older than you.”

“A dirty old man! By the way, where are your parents, Grandpa? I suspect you require a chaperon. They might frown upon naked young ladies in your den.”

“I’m glad to see you have retained your sense of humor throughout this ordeal, young lady. My parents are in Las Vegas with my brother and his wife. Kind of a Christmas present junket. I’m picking them all up at the airport tomorrow. Speaking of family, isn’t there someone you should call to let them know of your whereabouts?”

“Oh, my, yes, yes, yes! Geez, I hope Daddy isn’t mad about his Lincoln.”

“The important thing is that you weren’t injured, Annie. I’m sure your father will understand and be thankful rather than upset. Here’s my cell phone.”

“Thanks, Mark. I left mine back there in the blizzard. Couldn’t get to it when I was stuck.”

“You call and I’ll go get some more firewood.”

My father didn’t get upset, just like Mark predicted. When he found out I wasn’t hurt he joked about the entire situation. Of course I didn’t exactly tell him I was stranded and naked with a handsome doctor, although I don’t think he would have minded that all that much. Daddy already had previously expressed considerable interest in marrying me off even though I hadn’t even graduated from university yet. High anxiety about his first grandchild I guess. My older brother David doesn’t even have a girlfriend. He joked he wanted a new Lincoln anyway, even though his was only two weeks old, and how much he’d rather have that white one at the dealership than the black which he couldn’t keep looking clean. Daddy said he’d take care of reporting the accident to the police and insurance company, having it towed, and arranging the delivery of a rental vehicle to my current location. He first insisted on coming immediately to pick me up but I talked him out of that one. I kind of liked it where I was. I told him I’d just wait until morning for the rental and drive home. Not until I mentioned how bad the roads were right now and how much better they would be in the morning did he finally agree.

Mark came back with the wood just after I hung up. I told him briefly of the conversation with my father and that I would have a rental car in the morning.

“Let me have a look at your hands, Annie.” I still shivered and my hands remained very cold. “I don’t think you have frostbite but you still have that chill. It might take awhile. You sat upside down in that cold Lincoln for quite some time.”

“How in the world did you find me, Mark? I mean, I thought it just might be hopeless.”

“I’m not sure if you noticed but this house is on a hill. Not only that but I was up on the roof.”

“Up on the roof? Playing Santa? Ho, ho, ho!”

He chuckled delightfully. “No, actually, I cleaned the snow off the satellite dish because the reception got bad. Who wants to watch a fuzzy Lakers game? I told my father not to put it on the roof but he said the higher the better. I saw your blinking lights from up there and went down to investigate.”

“So I owe my salvation to a Lakers game?”

“Yes, you certainly do.” We both broke up. Why do women so easily fall in love with their doctor?

“Mark?”

“Yes, Annie?”

“Would you get in the sleeping bag with me?”

“What?”

“Take off your clothes and get in here with me.”

“Uh…I don’t know…”

“Strictly for therapeutic reasons. Your hands are very warm. No doubt your body is also. My hands are very cold. My body is freezing. Look, I’m still shivering!”

“Yes, that you are. All right.”

“I’ll turn my head while you…uh…you know.”

“Don’t bother. I’m not bashful. My apparent reluctance surfaced only because you shocked me momentarily with your suggestion.”

His body wasn’t just warm--it was hot, hot, hot! Kind of lean but yet muscular. Obviously he jogged and worked out. And I couldn’t take my eyes from the best part.

“Annie, you are staring at my penis. Haven’t you ever seen one before?”

“Uh…well…yeah…but…oh, never mind. I bet you have seen a lot of people naked.”

“Yes, I have, Annie. It’s quite necessary in the medical profession.”

“Well, get in, doctor, and have a look at one more.”

He did and snuggled up against my back. Oh my, didn’t that feel nice. “Tell me a story,” I requested sweetly.

“A story?”

“Yes, Mark, a story. We have to talk about something. I’m not tired, just cold. Tell me all about how you came to become a doctor. What motivated you. How you like it. What have been your most memorable experiences.”

Mark told me his doctor story for about fifteen minutes. His father is a doctor and his father before him. Just carrying on the family tradition although in the process Mark had become convinced it was indeed his calling. He somberly related his fondness for one patient in particular, a seven year old boy named Timmy. They had become very close and Mark had taken Timmy on several outings when his health permitted--Giants games and amusement parks and the like. The whereabouts of Timmy’s father were unknown and his mother seemed to work incredibly long hours as an advertising executive. Timmy eventually died as a result of the leukemia. I began to cry softly half way through the story because I knew how it would end and Mark’s voice seemed so sad.

“Tell me a story about you, Annie. What is your major and why? What are your aspirations and dreams?”

I told Mark my major was political science with law school as the next immediate objective on the horizon. Like him, a family thing as both my father and older brother David are attorneys. My interest lied in the area of environmental law I said. I could have smacked Mark up side the face because he snickered when I mentioned that my inspiration in that regard was John Grisham’s THE PELICAN BRIEF, and of course Julia Roberts in the movie. But I chose to attack him elsewhere.

I reached behind me and put my left hand on Mark’s penis.

“Yeow!” he screamed. “My God, your hands are cold!”

“Don’t I know it. I figure this is the best way to warm them up.”

“Where is your other hand?”

“Guess.”

“I’m afraid to. And you better…uh…not get too enthusiastic with what you’re doing with your left hand or I’m going to have a medical problem of my own soon that is going to need some sort of…uh…immediate attention.”

“I never gave a doctor a hard-on before, not that I could tell anyway.” I giggled.

“Annie, I’m sure you have given many men a hard-on, as you put it, unbeknownst to you. You are an extraordinarily beautiful young woman. And intelligent. And funny.”

“I like you too, doctor. So much so that I could almost say that I want you to make love to me. But we don’t know each other well enough for that. What do you suppose is the temperature in San Francisco right now?”

“My guess would be about 50 degrees now, 60 degrees in the day time, cloudy with the possibility of drizzle.”

“Much preferable to 5 degrees below zero, colder with the wind chill, and two foot of snow like it is here.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that, Annie. This weather is…uh…romantic. What would Christmas be without snow? I can’t imagine. I always try to come home for the holidays. For the snow, you know.”

“You are romantic, Mark.”

“I am?”

“You said I am beautiful.”

“But you are. I couldn’t even begin to tell you how lovely you are. It doesn’t take a brain surgeon to figure that one out. That red hair…your deep blue eyes…” I had freed my flowing tresses from the pony tail and brushed it out with my hands. I thought I probably looked like a bag lady.

“Mark, what do you suppose is the temperature in this sleeping bag?”

“You sure ask a lot of questions, Annie, but okay, I’ll bite. About 120 degrees on my side and 70 degrees on your side. Now how do we stabilize at 98.6 degrees, that’s the real question.”

I turned around and faced him, letting him see my breasts for the first time. He tried not to look but he couldn’t help himself. “Mark, it is getting warmer on my side, but it’s getting warmer on your side too. I can tell--I have my hand on your thermometer!”

“Yes…so you do. Your hand is getting warmer.”

“Your thermometer is getting bigger. How do you explain that phenomenon, doctor?”

“Global warming?”

“See, you’re funny too. Most doctors I know are so…so…clinical. Shouldn’t a thermometer be inserted in the patient’s mouth?”

“Uh…so you are an expert on thermometers?” Actually, my experience had been limited to two, and neither proved to be up to my expectations. Not even remotely satisfying. In other words, the only orgasms I had so far in my young life had been administered by my own fingers or a vibrator.

“No, but I’d like to be. How about a private lesson, strictly from a medical perspective, on how to effectively utilize a thermometer?”

“First thing, if you squeeze a thermometer like you are doing you could cause the fluid to squirt out and render it dysfunctional, at least for a short spell.”

“Oh my, I wouldn’t want to do that!” I removed my hand from his rigid penis and caressed Mark’s face. “Thank you for saving my life, doctor. I bet you hear that all the time.” I kissed him passionately and he reciprocated quite nicely. More than nicely--my heart fluttered and good thing I wasn’t standing then. The knees felt a little weak. I put his hands on my breasts. I wondered how his knees were.

“Mark, I said we don’t know one anyone well enough yet to make love.”

“Yes, you did say that, Annie.”

“But I do have one question.”

“Only one? What might that be? My hands are on your breasts, and no, I don’t think you need implants.”

“Will you fuck me, doctor? Right now.” His silence baffled and amused me at the same time.

“I don’t know what to say, Annie. Not often am I rendered this mute. You have a way of startling someone into becoming a blubbering idiot.” I giggled again.

“Doctor, please consider this as additional therapeutic treatment. If a good fuck doesn’t warm me up, nothing will. I want it hard and fast. We don’t need protection unless you think it’s necessary. I’m very regular and I can tell when I’m safe, not that I have to worry about it very much. By the way, I’ve never had a good fuck.” His continued periods of silence continued to puzzle me.

“Earth to Mark, earth to Mark. I said…”

“I heard what you said, Annie.” he interrupted. “The word ‘fuck’ coming out of your mouth shocked me. Would you please quit saying that word? If you do…I…uh…will do whatever you wish, within reason.”

“You will, Mark? Alrighty then, would you please sexually intercourse me? Please, please, pretty please?”

“That’s better. And now I won’t even mention how I feel about the fact that the most gorgeous creature I have ever set my eyes upon is trying to seduce me.” My heart just melted.

“Successfully?” I purred.

“We’ll let the thermometer be the judge of that,” he responded stoically, and then broke down into this silly grin. I started to cry silently…but happy tears. He wanted me as bad as I wanted him.

An hour later we held each other tightly and talked until I fell asleep. Neither of us woke until long after the sun rose, him first, poking me until I stirred. He rose from the sleeping bag. Oh my--the thermometer! The temperature had risen already.

“What we did last night, Annie,” he said with another silly grin, “was fuck. This morning we are going to make love.”

“Yeah, well the bleeping was pretty good, and how come you can say that word and I can’t? Anyway, that’s the first time I ever got off in my very limited experience with men. And if the loving is anything like the bleeping, I’m all for it.”

“What you experienced, Annie, was a clitoral orgasm, several of them. We are going to take that just a little bit further.”

“Yes! Whatever you say, doctor. But can I take a shower first? I feel a little grubby.”