"After the Exes: A New Beginning"
by Mr. Neb
"I have thought about this very moment and just as I thought, it's a little awkward!" Lauren said.
"I know what you mean", Jason agreed, almost relieved.
It was indeed awkward. Lauren and Jason were about to have sex for the first time but they were not teenagers. They were not young people just becoming sexually active. If that were the case, they would have blank sexual canvases. They would be developing their sexual personalities from scratch, together. They wouldn't know their own likes, dislikes, fantasies, secret desires, and personal taboos much less those of their first lover's. It would all be unknown and they would begin to figure it all out together.
No. These were two people in their 40's. They both had long marriages that ended in divorce. By now, they both had plenty of sexual history, almost all of it formed with imprint of their former spouses.
"I feel like a kid again," Jason continued. "I'm not sure what should I do, not do, or what to expect? If we were just kids, we could figure it out as we went along. We could discover together what we were comfortable with. But now. We each have our wants, preferences, and boundaries and mine might not be compatible with yours."
What made the awkwardness even more acute was that this conversation wasn't taking place during after-dinner coffee at the end of a date. That situation took place more than an hour ago. They were now in bed, Jason wearing just his boxers and Lauren was in just her bra and panties. They were committed.
Jason and Lauren had been dating for two months and neither had been in a hurry to start a new sexual relationship. Each had gone more than two years without one but it wasn't because they had lost interest in sex. Quite the contrary. It was because sex was so important to them that they knew it would require a big emotional investment before they would let a relationship get to that point. Prior to meeting each other, neither had felt that anyone had been worth that investment. So there they were, half naked, with long dormant hormones now awakening, emotions building, yet there were trepidations. The stakes were high. Neither wanted to mess this up.
"I trust you Jason. I am comfortable with us. I want this to be a part of our relationship. You are a kind and gentle man and I am sure you are a great lover and I want to be a good lover to you."
"I am sure you will be", Jason interrupted while he wrapped his arms around her in a deep hug. "But how do I avoid some sensitive issue that I don't know anything about?"
Lauren smiled.
"Well I guess there is good news there. I haven't given it a lot of thought but there probably isn't very much that would cause me to leap out of the bed screaming hysterically."
"OK," Jason said as he returned the smile. "Good to know."
This procrastinating talk was helping ease the tension and the emotional pressure that each had brought into bed. Afterall, it had been years since either had been in this position. They could wait a little while longer while they sorted things out.
Ah, but they couldn't delay things forever. The window for small talk was rapidly closing. Their ability to dissect this dilemma, analyze its pieces, and come up with a solution was rapidly being overrun by primal carnal forces that would soon make this whole issue moot. The blood of passion was now flowing within them. There was now a very effective erection present which Lauren had become aware of. Also present were sensitive nipples and increasing amounts of (so far) internal lubrication, all unstoppable and all as designed and intended by nature. These irreversible events were on autopilot and at some point they would overrun and swamp their ability for tender chit-chat.
Lauren returned the hug and also subtly moved her leg. This was her way of non-verbally acknowledging and approving of the present and growing situation between Jason's legs. One of his hands slowly and tenderly made its way down Lauren's back. His fingers momentarily snagged the elastic of her panties before making a caressing pass over her ass.
"We have talked a lot about our pasts," Lauren began while they embraced, "but I don't really know much about your relationship with Catherine. For me, it's easy. My sex life with Mike was practically non-existent so there is no baggage one way or the other. He pretty quickly lost all interest in sex, no matter what I did. It was frustrating. I was pretty much left to my fantasies that my imagination could come up with and my vibrator, so I guess I'm wide open."
The extra meaning in Lauren's words got a giggle out of both of them.
"In a way, it was the opposite for me," Jason lamented. "There is nothing wrong with my libido and I too have an active imagination but it was all pretty much stifled with all the rules. Catherine had an endless list of rules. No sex in the morning. No sex unless it was pitch dark in the bedroom. It was rare when she had all of her clothes off. The missionary position was pretty much it for us, and there was no talking. There was barely any noise at all. We could have made love in a library and no one would have known. God, I wish we could have done that."
"You wanted to have sex in a library?"
"Ha! No. Talk. I just wish we could have talked more."
"What do you mean talk? Like talking dirty during sex? Phone sex? Just talking about sex?"
"Yes! All of the above. God, there were so many times, in the heat of the moment, it was practically painful to not say what I was thinking."
"This is great," Lauren declared. "I'm glad we got into this. Who knows how long we would have gone with you being perfectly silent because you think that was what I wanted. I would be wondering why you were so quite. Was I doing something wrong? Were you mad at me? So for the record, it's perfectly OK for you to say anything you want. You don't have to hold back."
Jason hugged Lauren again, this time he deliberately pressed his erection against her thigh.
"OK but I don't think you know what you might be getting yourself in for, Jason warned. "I might get pretty chatty and graphic."
Lauren did not let this opportunity pass. She wanted to put Jason at ease and let him know that she was more than willing to be a very active and verbal participant. She moved her head aside of his, her lips were right at his ear but she said nothing at first. All he heard, and felt, was her measured breathing. Her hand slipped down through the slit in his boxers. She slowly wrapped her fingers around his very erect penis. She held him firmly and then she spoke.
"Why of course darling," she said breathlessly. "I want you to say anything and everything that you feel like saying. I'll do the same. Would you me to go first?"
She punctuated that last sentence with a gentle squeeze. Jason could only manage an unintelligible expulsion of air.
"Mmmmm. I like this," she seductively whispered while gently stroking him. "I like the feeling of your hard cock in my hand. I have been dreaming about this, fantasizing about doing this and having sex with you. I wondered what it would feel like to hold you like this, what it would feel like inside me, what you would ta..."
"Oh geeze Lauren!" Jason interrupted. "Slow down just a bit or things are going to end way too soon. You have no idea how that sort of thing makes me feel."
