Brian Smith was just months out of college when he received the phone call. Glancing at the caller id, Brian rolled his eyes as he realized it was his uncle Phil, always his advocate, on the line. He expected the usual lecture: "Brian, you can't live off of your parents' will forever. You need to find some occupation... With a B.S. in Biology..." The rant usually continued for another 5 minutes or so, until Brian couldn't handle it anymore, shutting up his uncle with a brief statement of remorse followed by some excuse or another to get off the phone. Regardless of the given excuse, his final words were always, "Phil, listen, I love you man. I'm just not ready to go out there yet. I'll do it soon, I promise. Thanks again."
But this time, Phil had a different reason for calling. No lecture this time. Just a simple offer. Before Brian could even say "hello," Phil stated, calmly and in monotone, "This is the last time I'll help you. If you refuse this offer, I am going to cease contact. Out of respect for your parents' lives and deaths, as well as for my love for you, concede."
Brian didn't know what to say... So Phil continued uninterrupted. "You have a B.S. in Biology. Granted, you didn't graduate with the greatest grades, but that isn't relevant. St. Mary's Academy is desperately in need of a long-term substitute sophomore biology teacher. It's the basics, Brian. You can do it – you know that stuff."