As a security guard at Christmas, it is usually a thankless task. All those office parties and you have to remain sober, alert and at your post. However once in a while something happens that turns the job into a bonus.
So it was at Christmas 1984, I was the sole security officer at a multi tenant office block. The five floors housed nine different companies, with a communal executive dining room on the top floor where the pent house would normally be. At this time of year this dining room is usually a very busy place booked up for all the staff parties of the tenant companies.
As a rule the parties normally begin around the 17th December and go through to the 24th. This particular year the 24th was a Saturday and therefore only one party was booked for that day. This meant that the only people on the premises would be associated with that party. The catering manager surprised me around 9.30 am, when he informed me "You know you may well be here for quite some time as usually the security never get relieved until at least the 28th by this company"
"I expect so!" was my reply.
"Well to make things easier on you, here are the spare keys fro the catering stores. Use what ever you want but make a list so I can knock it off my stock list when I return!" He continued. "This key is for the wine store, again go easy on it and let me know what you use" he added.
"As I do not drink, your wine store will be safe!" I informed him.
"That's as maybe, but there is more than just wines in that store, it's were the cokes and fruit juices are kept" he commented.
He told me that today's party wanted a cold buffet and it would be all laid out for them from 1.00pm. So he expected to get away around that time, the party was scheduled to start at 3.00pm and finish by 8.00pm. He informed me to ensure the place was locked and secured by 20.30 hrs.
He actually logged out around 12.30 pm and on my next patrol, I decided to check out the dining area. The long room was laid out with trays of sandwiches on trays covered with cling film with six cases of cokes stacked nearby.
I checked the storeroom, thinking about something to eat later after 9.00pm, there was just about everything you could think of in the freezer cabinets. I decided upon a nice selection of ham and cheese for later.
At 2.30 pm the party guests started to arrive, as required they signed into the building out of hours, this allowed me to check who was on site and ensure they had all left later. Nothing out of the ordinary occurred, apart from the occasional flirting between the female guests and me. One blonde woman with her two colleagues, thought she was being witty when she said "If you was only 20 years younger!" winking at me.
I responded with "You would still be cradle snatching!" smiling at her. She returned my smile. Before disappearing towards the lift, she produced a sprig of mistletoe and demanded a Christmas kiss. I think it was for show in front of her two younger colleagues, so I thought if she wants a kiss I'll give her one to remember for a long time to come.
I grabbed her and Rudolph Valentino style turned her into the clinch before giving her an open mouthed kiss. Sally responded by slipping her tongue in to my mouth and tried sword fencing with my tonsils. Her two colleagues merely clapped and cheered, whilst laughing. Breathlessly we broke our kiss and with a wink she said "Wow, I will be back later to see you later for some more".
"Not if I see you first!" I responded.