A Professor of Two Minds

Chapter II: Anna's Request

At the university where I teach, some students will do anything to get a great letter of recommendation.

Anna was one of my best students.

A pretty brunette with a killer body and a sweet smile, Anna needed a strong letter of recommendation to get into the University of Michigan Law School, one of the best in the country. She'd had me in three classes, and I was definitely in position to write a good letter for her. Without my letter, she'd never get into Michigan.

Anna was the kind of student who deserved to go to law school and would make an excellent law student—smart, dedicated, punctual, met every deadline, student body president, and captain of the team. She had worked hard in college. Her 3.92 GPA and very high test scores would have gotten her into many excellent law schools, but Michigan was so incredibly competitive.

To seal the deal she needed a great recommendation from a professor who knew her well.

And that professor was me.

It's unethical for a professor to write a great letter of recommendation for a student who isn't first rate.

It's also unethical, of course, for a professor to ask a student for something in exchange for a letter of recommendation. I knew professors who wanted cash, or, more subtly, would accept a 500 dollar gift card for a letter praising a student's qualities. I had never done anything like that. But Anna......Anna was special. Anna made me crazy.

And ethics was never my strong suit.

What would a professor risk to get involved with a student?

What would a student give to get into an elite American law school? To pay for law school, students would often have to go 150,000 dollars into debt. Law schools don't give scholarships.

Except....

Except to the very best students. A great letter could be worth a $25,000 a year scholarship for three years. Anna knew this perfectly well.

So when she knocked on my door that Thursday afternoon, Anna understood that the answer to the question she was about to ask me could be very valuable indeed.

Anna looked so great that day. She dressed up to come and see me. She had a wonderful blouse that highlighted her small but sexy breasts, and a short black skirt. Her legs were fantastic, muscular and smooth.

So when I asked her in the office, she was bright and perky, putting on her best face. And she was so smart and pretty. She really did brighten my day every time I saw her, in class or out.

She walked past the chair across from me, choosing to sit on the couch instead. I sat at my desk, smiling. She looked fantastic, a beautiful senior, with clear blue eyes, a quick smile, high cheekbones, full lips, and a relaxed, inviting pose.

After a little chit chat, she finally took a deep breath, flashed a big, awkward smile, and leaned forward, giving me a little glimpse down the front of her top. This was no accident, I thought, hopefully. She was getting ready to ask me for something important.

"Professor," she said, "I really want to go to law school."

"Well, that's great Anna. I knew that, actually. You told me last year that you were thinking about applying. With your grades, you shouldn't have any trouble getting in to a really good school."

She casually uncrossed her legs, and leaned forward.

"But Professor, honestly, the school I really want to go to is.... the University of Michigan."

"Wow, Michigan?"

"Yes, Sir." I loved it when she called me "Sir."

"You know how hard it is to get into Michigan, right? I think they only accept about four percent of all applicants. That's one acceptance for every twenty-five applications. One in twenty five!"

"Yes Professor, I know. But with my leadership positions on campus, my grades, my internship at the law firm, my great test scores, my double major......I was thinking I'd give it a shot. Some of my other professors think I have a really good chance." She looked at me hopefully.

I leaned forward and placed a hand lightly on her knee. "Listen, Anna, if you really want it, then you should give it a try." I smiled and nodded.

"Yes, but you really have to want to go to Michigan. They won't take anyone who isn't really dedicated. And can prove it." I smiled my slightly encouraging, slightly aggressive smile.

If you took an MRI of my brain right there and then, a certain primitive sector would have been flashing orange.

Was I really going to give in to this instinctive, animalistic feeling? Me, a highly regarded, internationally famous scholar and professor? Was I going to trade on my power over this sexy girl to satisfy my most perverse impulses?

Well...

Probably...

Anna straightened up and smiled. "Yes, sir! I really, really want to go! It's been a dream of mine! My grandfather went there! I've wanted to go to Michigan Law since I was a little kid!

Hmmmm, I thought to myself. How badly does she really want to go? I couldn't help but get aroused imagining just how badly she wanted this...this ...little scrap of paper that I'd sign. My "highest, most enthusiastic recommendation."

"Anna, I'm sure you know that to get into Michigan, you need it all. Great grades, leadership roles in university organizations, top-notch test scores and......" I gave her a meaningful look. "And absolutely fantastic letters of recommendation."

She blushed. "Yes, sir. That's why I'm here. I was wondering..." She hesitated. She looked away.

She squirmed. I loved seeing her in this awkward position. I treasured her nervous movements, her flushed cheeks, the way she moved from side to side, the way she absent- mindedly brushed the bangs from her eyes and rubbed the back of her neck as she got up the courage to ask.

"I was wondering if you..... if you could, like, you know, write me a.....you know...."

"A letter of recommendation?" I finished her sentence for her, coolly.

A wave of relief came over her face. She allowed herself a little laugh. "Yes, a letter of recommendation. I mean after all I took three of your courses and I got two A's and an A minus... It was you who really has encouraged me to go to law school. And you've always been my favorite professor, the one I did the most work for, who I really wanted to show how good I could be!"

"Yes, you had an almost perfect record in my courses... Yes, you have been a very good student," I told her in my slightly condescending professorial tone.

I smiled, but my eyes were dead serious.

"Not great, but certainly very good," I said, like the manipulative jerk I could be. You see, I had to keep some bit of leverage over her; I had to keep her willing to work for it. To please me...

Anna's face dropped. "Not great? But professor, you always wrote such positive comments on my papers and my exams...." Her voice trailed off.

"And I always loved your courses. I learned so much...." Her cheeks reddened again. Tears came into her eyes. "You, you ...inspired me to do my best, to go to law school, to excel." Her voice trailed off.

I watched all this with a mixture of sadness at how hurt she must be, and a kind of cold pleasure that she was responding exactly how I'd wanted. I really was a Professor of Two Minds: both professional and perverted at the same time.

"Oh, thank you Anna. That's very kind of you. I really have tried to mentor you as best as I could. But still...."

"But?"

I broke the bad news. Why did I love breaking Anna the bad news? I wanted her to have to work for her letter.

"But I can only write a great letter for Michigan for one student per year."

Anna was crestfallen. She looked as if she were about to burst into tears, or choke, or both.

"Only one? But can't I be the one? Can't I be the one who you write a 'great letter' for?" she pled.

"I'm sorry Anna." I leaned back, taking it all in. I hate myself sometimes. But I was really enjoying this. My little bit of power over a beautiful student.

"But who are you going to write the letter for this year?" Anna's voice was shaking.

"Well, do you know Melissa Angelo?"

Anna gasped audibly. "Of course I know Melissa. She's...." She couldn't go on. She looked like I had just told her the building was on fire and her puppy was trapped in the attic. "Melissa?? Melissa Angelo?!?"

I cut her off, coldly. "Melissa has a 4.0 average. She earned three straight A's from me. She's also president of the debating club and the honor society. She's captain of the conference-champion lacrosse team. Melissa was in here just yesterday asking for a letter to Michigan. I told her I'd probably write it for her."

Anna looked at me in shock. I tried to maintain my professorial demeanor.

"Melissa Angelo? Melissa Angelo??!" She acted as though she'd just heard that Melissa Angelo had just been selected to fly to Mars on the Space Shuttle." "Melissa???" She was practically screaming by now. I found it very attractive, somehow, that raw emotion on her face and in her gestures of despair and rage.

"But Melissa is such a suck up! Such a teacher's pet! She's just a little bimbo! She just flirts with all the professors! She doesn't work a tenth as hard as I do! She hasn't earned her good grades."

I couldn't tell if Anna was protesting in disgust or spitting up a hairball as the words came tumbling out.

Amid her eruption, I couldn't help but laugh.

"Oh, yes, she's earned them. I think you underestimate Melissa's... determination. Oh, and her intelligence, too."

"Intelligence and determination, my ass! She's an idiot."

Anna leaned back in the couch and glared at me.

Suddenly the focus of her rage shifted away from Melissa. She turned the white-hot laser beam of her anger on me.

"And I had such respect for you as a scholar and teacher." She spoke to me as if she'd just tasted rotten fish.

Suddenly, this wasn't so amusing any more.

I tried to deflect. "What do you mean? I don't see why my writing Melissa a letter of recommendation would affect your opinion of my teaching and scholarship."

"Yea right." Anna crossed her arms and stared at the door, fuming. Was that smoke I could see coming out of her ears?

"I am so disappointed in you..." Suddenly, things weren't turning out exactly as I had envisioned them. Even I was beginning to feel disappointed. I was somehow feeling....I don't know what that feeling was. It wasn't guilt, was it? I hoped not. I had to remember, it was I who had the power in this relationship. She had no power over me, no ability to make me feel bad in this little teacher-student relationship.

Yes, it was time to move in for the kill.

I tried to act smooth. I leaned back and stretched.

"Anna, listen. Let's think about this. Is there anything that you think you can say....or do...to change my mind?" I smiled a smile that I thought was playful, suggestive, even just slightly sexy. I was wrong.

She leapt to her feet. "Fuck you!"

"Uhh..."

"Shut up, you asshole!" She burst into tears.

"And to think that for three years I looked up to you! I adored you! You expanded my intellectual horizons. You made me think in new ways. You made me want to go out and take on the world, to change the world! Ha!"

I did? When did that happen?

"And now you've stooped to this bullshit? Passing out letters of recommendation in exchange for... for sex?!"

She was screaming. People in the suite of offices could hear if she shouted any louder. And if there's one thing a professor has to fear any more, it's a sexual harassment suit. Not even tenure can protect a professor from that charge. Sure it's very hard to prove that your professor really had sex with you. But if you could prove it, you could, in fact, get the professor dismissed and disgraced. Which was exactly what a few bitter students wanted.

"Anna!" I hissed to her. "Be quiet! There are people out in the hall! For God's sake, do you want to get me fired?"

I realized right away that that was a very stupid thing to say.

Anna laughed. "Guess, Professor! Just guess if I want to get you fired!" Incredibly, her voice had actually gotten louder by a few decibels.

Now I was really nervous. This was going all wrong.

"Listen, Anna," I whispered loudly, "You misunderstood me! I am not proposing having sex with you! Now sit down and cut it out."

She sat down, still steaming and wiping the tears from her cheeks.

"I would never do that to a student. I don't know where you got the idea that I would ever swap sex for a recommendation. That is just outrageous," I lied.

She looked at me and smirked.

"Yea, right." She shifted on the couch. I do have to admit, she looked great. Her fidgeting, her trying to regain her composure, the red eyes, the smeared makeup. The way she pulled at her skirt angrily.

Anna went on: "And of course the great irony is that, yes, I am attracted to you. I have always thought you were handsome and very sexy."

My eyes widened. I tried not to smile. Wow. She found me... very sexy?

"Well, Anna, the feeling is completely mutual...."

She cut me off sharply: "Don't get ideas, asshole! Those days of you being my fantasy are completely over!" As she spoke, she sliced her hand through the air for emphasis like a kung fu master. I leaned back, out of harm's way, I hoped.

"Listen, Anna. I really think that there is a misunderstanding here. Melissa is a sweet girl, but I am just not interested in her sexually. I would never do something like that. It's unethical." I did my best to appear calm and persuasive. My best, it seems, was not good enough.

Anna just looked at me blankly. She stared. When she spoke, her voice was hushed. "I was so stupid."

"And to think that I used to dream about being with a Professor... I thought you respected me. I thought you were the one."

Her hands moved to her thighs.

"I dreamed about being with...with you. I was so deluded. I thought you liked me. And you....you made me think that you liked me."

I couldn't believe it. She brought her fingers to the hem of her black skirt and began sliding it, slightly, upwards.

"To think that sometimes, when I was home in the evening, I would think about you, about us...." Her right hand moved to her inner thigh, now exposed.

She squeezed and rubbed it lightly. Her fingers trailed over her thighs.

I started to lean over.

She put her hand out straight up. "Freeze! Don't touch me." I froze.

I tried to pull myself together. "But Anna, I wasn't going to touch you," I lied.

"You are such a liar." She was very perceptive, I'll give her that.

I was having trouble composing myself. She was sliding the skirt up higher. I caught a glimpse of her flowered panties.

"Anna, I think that maybe...maybe you should stop. Remember, I could never be sexually involved with a student. That would cost me my job, so of course I'd never, ever do that. Listen, I'll think over your request for the letter of recommendation and ....."

"Don't make me laugh! You absolutely deserve to be fired."

What she said terrified me. But she had become so relaxed. She seemed to have forgotten about her anger. And her hands continued to move. She started breathing a little harder. So did I.

She took one foot and lifted it onto the couch, providing me with a full view under her skirt at her beautiful thighs, her pretty panties, and her lingering fingers. Her fingers moved in a circle, slowly. She raised her hips slightly off the couch, pressing herself a little more firmly against her fingers.

Her eyes were closed. She moved. Her fingers pressed harder.

Suddenly, she opened her eyes. "Do you like what you see, Professor?"

Well, yes, I loved what I saw. "No, Anna, of course not! You should leave. This is too much. We could get in trouble."

She chuckled. "You mean YOU could get in trouble. That's what you deserve"

Anna rubbed the front of her panties a little harder.

She looked me in the eyes. "Professor, you enjoy watching a girl touch herself, don't you?"

I sat there, looking for words. How did she know?

"Really, Anna, this has gone way too far," I whispered urgently. "This is far too risky. You should take your backpack and leave...."

But instead of following my sage advice, Anna did quite the opposite. She moved her fingers so slightly, trailing across the damp spot on the front of her panties. With her eyes locked on mine, she slowly pulled the crotch of her panties to the side, exposing her pink, slick lips. Two fingers lightly teased her clit.

Her eyes flashed. "No, Sir, I won't leave. I won't leave until you promise to write me a great letter of recommendation." She slid one finger inside...then, alongside it, a second.

"Anna, this is ridiculous. You must leave at once!"

She bit her lip "Professor, I know you love to watch... I know you do."

I was mesmerized. It was the sexiest thing I had ever seen. Anna's slick fingers gliding inside, the sheen of the juice shining. Her body tensed up. Anna leaned back in the couch.

She was starting to moan. Biting her lip. "Professor, I always wanted to do this for you. To let you watch me. I would lie in bed imagining you were watching me play with myself. I would cum.....so....hard."

"Anna, no... you must leave," I sputtered weakly and completely without conviction. "What if someone should find out....?"

Then this devil of a woman did something unforgivable. She slid her fingers out from between her pink, slick lips and leaned forward to me. I was still sitting in my chair, watching her with wide eyes. She very slowly brought her fingers toward me.

"Professor, I know something about you."

I started. "What do you mean?"

"I know that Melissa Angelo touched herself in your class. While you were lecturing, and while you were checking her out, she masturbated for you. Right in class. Isn't that true?" [For details, see the first installment of "A Professor of Two Minds"]

Her fingers kept moving toward me...toward my mouth. "Of course not," I lied again. "How could you have ever imagined something like that could have happened?"

As her fingers moved toward me, I involuntarily opened my mouth, like a baby bird ready for dinner. But Anna, that demon, pulled away at the last second, and broke the very bad news.

"Because, Professor.... Melissa told me."

What???

"She told me exactly what happened in class. How she touched herself in class while you watched... Oh my god, it was so exciting to hear about it! So sexy! God how I wished that I had done it. Maybe then you'd give me a letter for Michigan!"

She brought her fingers to her mouth and closed her eyes. She slowly tasted her fingers, smiling slightly, a devilish, ecstatic smile. "Melissa told me that when she put her fingers in her mouth, she thought you were going to cum right there at the podium." She giggled.

I was completely shocked. I was petrified. Melissa had been talking to people about that? I could be in very serious trouble if word of this spread any further.

"Anna, Melissa is lying. That never, ever happened. It's just a figment of her overactive imagination. Some girls are like that. They fantasize about something, then tell their friends that it really happened. I'm sure you understand that."

"No, Sir, she wasn't lying." Her moved her fingers back into herself and gasped. I could smell her aroma. It was driving me crazy.

"Of course she was. A silly schoolgirl fantasy. A lovely daydream, but bearing no resemblance to reality..."

"No, Sir." She looked directly at me, her thumb again teasing her clit as she slid her fingers up and down her soaking wet, pink lips. "That's not true."

"Well, how would you know, anyway? Why would Melissa confide something that like that to you? You guys barely know each other," I offered, hopefully, nervously.

Anna laughed. "Actually... Melissa Angelo is my roommate."

I literally sat there with my mouth open. This whole situation really wasn't developing the way I had hoped.