A Letter to a Lost Lover

I've been reading dirty stories for the last three hours, playing with myself, thinking about what I would do to you if I had one more night with you.

I always love to start clothed, because it adds an air of mystery, but let's face it, when were we ever clothed?

I'd love to do you someplace public, like we did that one time in the bathroom. The couch at the house, maybe, or the pool table, or the stairwell. But, being realistic, it would be in your big bed at the apartment.

I imagined you finding me there, unexpected, naked and asleep, or pretending to be. How would you react if that happened? Even I don't know at this point. Honestly, the only way I would get to have sex with you is if I convinced you of it beforehand. You've been weird about this whole breakup, but sometimes all I really want to do is fuck you.

If I could have it any way, excluding surprising you, which would end badly, exhibitionism, which I want, group sex, which I want, or another girl involved, which I want very badly (I never got up the courage to tell you how much I want to go down on a girl while you watched. I'd like tie you up so you couldn't do anything, and fuck a girl right in front of you. I'd like to eat a girl out while you fucked me from behind. I'd even like to watch you fuck another girl, as long as I could be part of it), I guess it would start with us naked, you rubbing me with lotion. I know you only did it as a favor to me, but it got you so hot that time.

I'm lying there, on the bed, my ass in front of you, my arms cradling my face, eyes closed, enjoying the feel of your hands on me (to think I once thought them too small). I'd let you warm up to it, rub the lotion between your hands, but it would still be cold when you started to rub it on my back, your naked thighs on either side of mine, your dick resting in the cleft of my ass. I love feeling it there, not obtrusive, but noticeable. I would have gladly tried anal with you had you asked.

You'd start with my shoulders, my neck, my back, my hips, my thighs, my calves, my ankles, my feet, and finally my ass. I'd like it if you dug your fingernails into my flesh a little bit.

Then you'd have me flip over, the tip of your penis just touching my belly button, and lotion my front, completely ignoring my breasts like you forgot they were there, until at last you grabbed them and massaged them as long as you wanted.

My breasts aren't very sensitive, I always wanted you to be rougher with them, rougher with me in general. I'm not as breakable as you seemed to think. I don't think you ever really got over the fact that I was a freshman and you were a junior. You had this idea that I was innocent, even when I clearly showed you I wasn't.

You'd finish up with my breasts, and want to go wash your hands.

But, I wouldn't let you. I longed to tie you to the bed, to take control of you, but was always too scared. And, in this, you are right. You were older, more experienced, and I was afraid to take charge. I should have.

I would tie you up, maybe even tie your legs to the bed so they're spread apart. And I'd blindfold you, because it is always so much sexier when you don't know what's going to happen or where I'm going next.

I love using my mouth on you. It's pretty much the sexiest thing in the world. My friends make fun of me, they all hate it, but we weren't a loud couple and there's something about having you in my mouth, my face buried in your pubic hair, your hands knotted around the back of my head, that was so erotic, so pleasurable, so intense.

God, I loved your penis. I would do anything to have it right now. You joked that I owed you a million odd blowjobs, and I would have gladly given you everyone. Even now, I would wrap my hands around your ass and plunge my face into your groin, even if that was all it was. You can face fuck me any day of the week and I will be so turned on by the end of it, you wouldn't know what to do with me.

I'd hover over your captive body and tease you for all you're worth. I'd start up top and work my way down, kissing, licking, even just breathing on various parts of your body. I'd have to be careful, you're ticklish.

You always got antsy when I got near your penis. God, the way you moved your hips, begging for it without even saying a word. I'd neatly skip your dick, licking and kissing your exposed thighs instead. Maybe even your balls, I don't even know if you like that. I'd kiss the pubic hair around your penis, and then I'd start the whole thing over again, each time getting closer and closer to putting my mouth on you.

I never teased you enough, I was so enraptured by you and turned on by you, I always gave it to you exactly when you wanted it. Well this time I would make you wait. You'd complain. You'd beg, You'd have to. I wouldn't put you in my mouth until you begged me for it. And even then, I'd do it softly and slowly. Kisses here, licks there, and all the time you struggling to get the whole thing in my mouth.

God, I wish I could tell you this. This has nothing to do with our feelings, just this desire I have for your body, how I dream about you abusing me at night, how I relive our last fucks together, especially, the last one where you teased me till I begged you. Damn, you're sexy.

So there you are, tied up and begging for it. You'd have to actually use your words. Before you got by on just hints, but you would have to tell me, full out, what you wanted me to do. "I want my penis in your mouth. I want you to blow me. I want to face fuck you until I come."

As soon as the words are out of your mouth, your dick is all the way in mine. Its thickness always surprised me. You were a man, unlike any of the others I had ever had. The way you took control, in the kitchen, in the bed room, the thoughts that came from that brain of yours. You captivated me, enraptured me. You could have any girl you wanted, Sam. And you chose me.

You were so silent during sex, so stoic, almost, like you couldn't let yourself admit that you liked it. But when you'd let out even one sound, god I always wanted to shove you inside me right then and there.

Your thighs are spread, my hands clenching the muscles. You'd want me to put my hands on you, but you'd be tied up and you wouldn't have a choice. I'd run my fingers up and down your thighs, making sure to gently scratch and not tickle, higher and higher each time.

I'd let a finger graze the skin between your penis and your ass, and you'd love it. I'd slowly wrap one hand around you, near your balls, as you slid up and down my tongue. The other would linger lower, squeezing your balls, rubbing that skin, even occasionally going further back, between your cheeks, to touch the little pucker of your ass.

If I got up the nerve to stick a finger up you, you'd go mad. I'd use my vibrator on you, swirling it around that hole, pressing it to the bottom of your shaft, and you wouldn't be able to stay silent. You'd whine for my other hand to move, instead of just gripping you while my mouth did all the work.

You'd get harder and harder as I played with you, teasing the head with my tongue, sucking you part of the way into me, and then, finally, sliding my hand up and down, my head bobbing as I tried to stick you down my throat. I was able to deep throat you one time, it was so incredibly hot. I'm getting wet just imagining being able to do it again.

Abruptly, I'd let you go, move my mouth away, and you'd be left alone, blindfolded, wondering what was going to happen next. I would carefully straddle you, one leg on each side, lean forward and kiss you, with a little teeth, right below your jaw. The time you sank your teeth into me, god, if I was able to have an orgasm with you, I would have come right then and there. (That's the one thing I always regretted, not being able to give you the satisfaction of making me go over the edge. But you got me closer than anyone else. And what you made me feel was ten times more erotic and ten times more satisfying then what I feel when I masturbate.)

My pussy wet, your shaft glistening with my saliva, I'd position myself over you, and drop down until you were just touching me. You used to tease me like this, and this would be my way to get back at you. You'd beg me, writhing your hips trying to get inside me, and I'd drop a couple of inches, your dick partway in me. It would be torture for me as well, but I'd endure.

You'd thrust up wards, but I'd lift myself so you couldn't go any deeper. I'm in charge this time, you'll have your turn to fuck me soon. I'd slowly slide myself down you, inch by inch, taking all of you at my own pace, until finally, I'd have all of you inside me. You'd want to fuck then, but I'd hold your hips down, and slowly rise back up again, until just your head was inside me

.

Then, without warning I'd drop, grunting as gravity drove you deep inside me. I'd break then, my resolve gone, I'd bounce up and down, riding you while you struggle to thrust to my rhythm, straining at your bonds. I'd go, go, go until you were breathing heavily, trying to hold in your exclamations of ecstasy.

Finally, you'd let yourself go and a word or a moan would escape your lips. Only then would I break my rhythm to reach forward and untie you.

You'd sit up, ripping off your blindfold, wrapping your arms around me, and pull me down till my body was against yours. You'd grab my hips and pound up into me, fucking me as I panted and moaned with your every move. I'd catch my breath, begging you to tell me before you came. You'd tell me you were close, and, at the last moment, I'd rip myself from your embrace, and pull myself off of you.

You'd fight me, but I'd be forceful. I'd pull you to the side of the bed, forcing you to stand on the floor in your naked glory. Then, I'd lie on my back, my head dangling over the edge and I'd say, "I want you to fuck my face."

You'd need no other incentive. You'd grab me by the hair, shoving your thick cock into my open mouth, forcing it to the back of my throat. One stroke, then you'd pull out completely

.

I'd gasp "Be rough with me." And you'd thrust back into me as I panted and tried to pull you deeper inside me. One hand would stay wrapped in my hair, pulling my face up to reach your groin. The other would explore my body, pinching my nipples as I always wished you would, twisting and flicking as I moaned with every movement.

You'd lean forward, your hands resting on the bed on either side of me, and your cock going even further in my mouth, and take a nipple in your teeth. Pain, beautiful, erotic pain, would radiate from my breast as you abused me.

Finally, my lips in your public hair, you'd reach forward and grab me by the thighs, pulling my wet pussy up to meet your mouth. You don't have to be good at it, you don't have to be well practiced. The added sensation of your wet mouth and tongue on me is enough to drive me crazy.

You'd hold me by the legs, pounding into my mouth, and explore me with your lips and tongue, and even teeth, making me squirm, wanting something more inside me. You'd know, but now you're in control.

You'd ask me what I wanted, teasing me more and more. You'd ask again and again, and finally I'd manage to talk past your cock and say "I want you to fuck me. Hard."

With that, you'd pull out of me, flip me onto my stomach, and pull me to my knees, your hardness poised at my eager entrance.

But I wasn't off the hook yet. You'd tease me with the tip you're your penis, rubbing it in my wetness. I'd push back against it, trying to take you inside, but you'd push me away, asking me to beg for it. You'd push barely into me and spank me, harder than you'd done before. I'd gasp in pain and pleasure, and whine. "Beg." You'd spank me again, harder and harder, until I was practically trying to impale myself on you. You'd lean forward and sink your teeth into my ass and finally I'd scream, "Please, oh god, please fuck me."

You'd lean back, spread my cheeks with your hands, and thrust into me hard as I moaned with every stroke. You'd push the small of my back down with your hand, till I was resting my head on my arms, only my ass in the air. You'd pound into me as I gasped and grabbed fistfuls of blankets.

You'd lean forward and growl that you were going to come inside me, and I'd beg you to let me watch you. Without breaking stride, you'd flip me on my back, and I'd put my legs on your shoulders, my ass hanging off the side of the bed. I'd bite my tongue as I came as close to an orgasm as I'd been with you, moaning "Don't stop, please, Sam, don't stop."

You'd lift my ass to meet you, pound into me, until finally you'd gasp in a breath. You'd do something you'd never done before, saying my name as you came inside me, not stopping until your orgasm was over and you grew soft inside me.

Then, you'd gently pull out of me, swing my legs back onto the bed, and come lay down beside me, my head nestled against your sweat covered neck.

I'd kiss your shoulder, and you'd cup your hand under my chin and kiss me, your tongue slipping gently into my mouth, and out again, catching my lower lip between your teeth, and pulling away so it stretch between us, eyes locked, hearts pounding, breath catching in our lungs.

You'd pull me back to lay my cheek against your chest, our legs intertwined, and kiss me once on the top of my head. We'd lay there, sometimes silent, sometimes talking until we fell asleep.