Author's Note: This story contains brother/sister incest. Enjoy!
"Do you know why animal crackers have that little handle on top of the box?" Danny asked, nudging his sister with his knee.
"No," Emily sighed, putting her own book down and switching off her reading light, waiting. There was no use doing anything else—he was going to tell her, whether she wanted to know or not.
"They were introduced in 1902 as a Christmas novelty and packaged so they could be hung from Christmas trees," he said, reading from the book in his lap.
"How interesting," she commented, rolling her eyes. It had been like this all day, and now halfway into the night—a constant stream of interruptions with various bits of trivia. She hadn't even made it off the fourth page of her own book!
"How many different animal shapes are there?" he asked, cocking his head at her.
"I don't know," she replied, closing her eyes and leaning her head back against the seat, feeling the rolling wheels of the bus underneath them chewing up the miles between here and California. "Twenty-seven?"
"No!" he scoffed. "Eighteen—two bears, a bison, a camel, a cougar, an elephant, a giraffe, a gorilla, a hippopotamus, a hyena, a kangaroo, a lion, a monkey, a rhinoceros, a seal, a sheep, a tiger, and a zebra."
"Okay, seriously, Danny," she said, shaking her head but not opening her eyes. "Alex Trebek is not going to ask you about animal crackers."
"You never know," he said, sounding hurt.
"Yes, I do," she replied, ignoring the tone in his voice and pushing onward. "Jeopardy asks questions about the periodic table and Queen Victoria, not snack foods."
"Fine." He jerked himself toward the window. "I'll just shut up and leave you alone."
Emily smiled, still not opening her eyes, breathing, "Finally!"
It was quiet only for a moment before he spoke up and asked, "What does the chemical symbol Fe2O3 represent?"
"Danny!" she groaned, slapping her forehead. "I have no idea! I'm not the Mensa member, here."
"Rust," he replied, looking smug. She hit him in the arm. "Hey! I'm just trying to expand your horizons a little!"
"I don't need my horizons expanded," she hissed, getting up and flouncing off to the bathroom. Emily splashed her face with water, pushing her dark blonde hair out of her face. Her eyes were blue and bright, like her brother's and her mother's, although their hair was dark. She had always been a tow-head—like her father.
This is his fault, Emily thought, scrubbing her hands fiercely. If he hadn't ever moved out to California in the first place...
She sighed, turning the hand dryer on. When she'd agreed to this cross-country trek to visit their father, mostly so her twin brother could to try out for Jeopardy now that they'd reached the eligible age of eighteen, she hadn't counted on having to listen to Danny "practice" for hours on end. She loved her brother—but come on! There was only so much trivia one person should be forced to listen to, wasn't there?
He was turned toward the window when she got back, looking at something on his video Ipod. She flopped into her seat, digging through her backpack for her own Ipod.
"I'm sorry," Danny apologized without looking up.
She softened, hearing his hurt tone. "It's okay... I'm just... you know, not looking forward to swallowing the whole Dad and his new wife and kids Happy Family Meal..."
"Yeah," he agreed, rolling his eyes. "No doubt."
"Damnit, I left my headphones in my suitcase," she sighed, tossing her Ipod back into her bag.
"Do you want mine?" Danny asked. "I'm just reading..."
"Reading? On your Ipod?" Emily made a face. "Don't you listen to music and watch videos like normal people?"
"Just more research," he said with a shrug, not meeting her eyes.
"I'm sorry, Dan," she apologized again, touching his arm. "I didn't mean... what are you reading?"
"Porn," he replied, still not looking at her.
She laughed. "Very funny."
"Well, it's not really..." he admitted, giving her a sheepish grin. "It's just an e-book of useless sexual trivia."
"More trivia, huh?" she smiled, shaking her head.
"It's interesting," he said. "Did you know that the tapeworm has the most sexual organs of any living being?"
"Oh gross," she groaned, hiding her face in her hands. "Danny, please!"
"Okay, okay," he grinned. "How about this... How many orgasms do you think was the most ever recorded for a woman in 24 hours?"
Emily cocked her head at him, frowning. "I don't know... nine? Ten?"
His smile grew. "A hundred and thirty four."
Her eyes widened. "Oh my god! I'd die!"
"For guys it was only sixteen... although I swear I've beat that..."
"Danny!" Emily hissed his name, glancing around at the sleeping bus to see if anyone was listening.
"How many for you?" he asked, looking at her speculatively.
"I don't know," she shrugged, biting her lower lip. She had the distinct feeling that she shouldn't be talking about this with her brother. "Probably five... maybe six..."
"Lightweight," he said with a wink. "But you guys... or gals, I should say... get to have longer orgasms. A man's climax only lasts 10 seconds, tops... girls have had orgasms for nearly a minute..."
Emily squirmed in her seat. "Dan... let's change the subject..."
"Why?" he asked, giving her a sideways look. "You want to talk about animal crackers some more?"
"No!" she protested. "Ok, fine, tell me more sex trivia..."
"There are only five calories in the typical male ejaculation," he told her.
"Oh good god!" she laughed. "That's a good reason not to swallow!"
"Eh, not really," he said. "Sexual intercourse burns about three hundred and sixty calories."
"Well, at least I can say I'm multitasking..."
"Did you know a woman's nipple can swell up to twenty five percent when she's aroused?"
Emily flushed. "Is that so?"
"Well, that's what it says..." Danny's eyes moved over the front of his sister's blouse. "And this is kind of neat... there's a tribe on one of the Cook Islands where boys of a certain age are actually taught how to have sex... everything from intercourse to cunnilingus, and methods for delayed ejaculation..."
"Like... hands on?" Emily swallowed, wiggling in her seat.
"I think so," he nodded. "Which, when you think about it, could be really useful..."
She nodded. "I can see that... most of the guys I've been with..."
When she trailed off, he glanced over at her. "Yeah?"
"Well... let's just say, they could have used some instructional techniques."
"Yeah," Danny sighed. "I could have used some, too."
Emily looked at her brother, a little smile on her face. "I bet you do alright."
"I'm a geek," he said, shrugging. "Geeks don't get the girls, you know."
"Ha!" she nudged him with her shoulder. "What about that Sarah girl last year? I saw you guys in the pool that summer..."
Danny flushed. "Yeah? Well... you should have closed your bedroom door when you and Max were... ya know... getting busy..."
Emily felt her face fill with heat. "Dan! You didn't..."