ZARDOZ
CHAPTER FIVE OZ THE GREAT AND POWERFUL
"A long night Culane?" I asked sarcastically when that wicked man entered the dining hall in the morning.
"We had a rather painstaking job before us,' he replied breezily. He looked well rested, the bastard, and he was kitted up ready for battle. Galinda trailed in behind him looking very smug and more relaxed than I had ever seen her, obviously she had been fucked good and hard, and had betrayed her oath just like the rest of us.
"Don't forget that you promised me tonight,' I hissed as he walked past me to greet Theodora who rushed into his arms. "I missed you Culane," she said staring up at him with cow's eyes, embarrassing us all.
He gave her a quick kiss, and holding her on one arm he beckoned to the rest of us, "No need to dally, Ravenna is at the River Wick and preparing to cross into Evenora's lands," he said. I already knew that, I was not sure how he did.
"How can we go now, your flying ship is not even prepared yet; do you expect me to carry you and Theodora on my back?" I asked.
"That won't be necessary, come take my hand and I will show you another trick I recently remembered," he said. Galinda was already standing behind him holding on to his shoulder. Not knowing what kind of foolishness they were up to I took his hand and literally, in the blink of an eye, we were no longer at Galinda's palace but standing on a promontory high above the river Wick. Theodora gasped.
"What the hell is going on?" I demanded feeling very uneasy.
"Well I do believe that Ravenna is standing on the rock just across the river there, see where the red glow of her scowl rises up, and that would be her army down there below who appear to have completed some pontoon bridges and are preparing to cross,' he said with infuriating calm.
'Yes, damn it, and here come her Bargs. We are not prepared, what have you done Culane?" I shouted at him. A dark cloud was rising up from where Ravenna stood and was moving towards us, clearly it was her Bargs, five hundred of them at least.
It was too late to flee, we must somehow make a stand, but Theodora was crouching behind Culane and Galinda was calmly patting her head. Culane just stood there, "Leave them to me," he said.
When the fierce creatures were no more than a hundred yards away Culane let out a mighty shout that could not have come from any mortal man. His a huge voice filled the sky and seemed to literally blow the beasts to a halt, then he began to address them in their own language; "Your master has returned, and now I command you to return to your jungle home and stay within its bounds until I summon you. Now go!"
Immediately the pack of Bargs veered off to the southeast and I found myself staring at Culane with open-mouthed dismay, the light of terrible truth dawning on me. Ravenna obviously wasn't impressed for she came right in to land as if the Bargs had already attacked. She stalked towards us anger flashing warning in her dark eyes, hair flying in the wind. "How dare you interfere in the affairs of Oz you worm. This is no place for a man, we killed them all." She came right up to him and practically shoved her face into his; in her hand she held a long silver bladed dagger dripping with poison. "I have watched you little fraud as you have seduced each of my spineless sisters. Did you think that you would fool me too, did you think that I would roll over and present you my asshole like those little sluts?" she screamed at him.
"No Ravenna, I wouldn't bother, I see nothing in you but malice and evil; there is nothing in you to redeem," he replied loudly but calmly.
She gave him a look of utter disgust, "Die human," she shouted and lashed out with her dagger. She was very fast, but he was faster. He dodged the blow and then struck her with a swift backhand that staggered her. She took a step backward, a look of complete shock and terror as she touched her cheek. She looked at us, imploring us, the hand that held the dagger now empty. She let out a mercifully short shriek before her mouth melted away into her dissolving neck, and then her whole body dropped like a pail of colored water and splashed on the rock before dribbling away over the cliff to the river far below.
"Oh shit," I whispered dropping to my knees on the hard ground, "Please forgive me master!" I cried out.
Galinda slowly lowered herself too leaving Theodora standing alone, looking this way and that in confusion. "I don't understand," she said, "Will someone please tell me what is going on?" she pleaded.
I yanked at her coat trying to pull her down next to me. She looked down at me with big clueless eyes; "He's the wizard," I hissed.
"The wizard?" She looked from me back towards Oz who now stood regarding us sternly with his hands on his hips. My stomach was doing flip-flops and I was sweating in the cold mountain air almost gagging at what I had seen him do to Ravenna, so swiftly, so effortlessly.
It finally dawned on her, "Oh," she said with surprise and then again with realization and fear. She dropped to her knees like a stone and lowered her head. "Please, please forgive me master,' she pleaded, "I am just a simple, foolish young witch." Oz said nothing and I waited without daring to breathe to see how he would treat her as a sign of what would happen to me; I knew that whatever it was, I was in for worse.
"What a pair of little harlots," he said at last in a hard voice. I dared not look up, but I felt him now looming over us. "Galinda was not fooled," he said and I bit my lip in jealousy; "Rise Galinda."
I could hear them kissing and ground my teeth together, Theodora was starting to sob and I shushed her. "I will make you my regent to rule Oz during my absences, will you please go now and sort out that rabble down there; get them back to their houses and barracks and see that order is restored to the South. You will manage her lands directly until I can find a worthy new witch for the south. You will find me at the Emerald City when you are done, I will be in the throne room where these faithless whores will be attempting to tell me why they should not have the same fate as Ravenna."
"Yes of course, My Lord," Galinda replied. I thought to start my pleading but there was too great a lump in my throat so all I could manage was a sob no better than Theodora.
He worked his hand deep into my hair and took a firm grip, "Now we shall see if either of you is worth keeping around,' he said, and again in a blink we were transported, this time to the throne room which had never seemed so cold and forbidding to me before.
I had made some changes to the throne room; on the central dais I had placed a fairly large, well-padded, straight backed chair to the right of the throne, and to the left, two slightly smaller, less well-padded chairs; all had low padded ottomans. I hauled the two faithless witches up to their feet in front of their respective chairs and turned them to face me; "Silence" I thundered when they started begging again.
