It's been four years since the incident - an experiment that went badly wrong. We don't have a better name for it but we do, at least now, have an explanation.
Four years ago, a group of scientists actually found a way to make some of the crazier tech from sci-fi shows like Star Trek a reality. I've never understand the science or the technobabble that goes with it but I do understand people. Giving humanity transporters, shields and phaser weapons did not usher in era of peace, prosperity and good will to all men. Instead we got crazy - and the scientists who invented the tech went batshit first. The power went to their head and instead of helping humanity they decided to make all their own fantasies come true.
Using this new tech, a group of male scientists decided to shield themselves off from the world on an island. The way things were going, they assumed the world was coming to an end - they could either enjoy the end times or ride it out and come out on top. When the dust cleared, they would lower their shields and repopulate the world. As they were all men, and cloning wasn't among the technologies they'd created, they were going to need women. Lots and lots of women.
Using the transporter technology, these men kidnapped women that had caught their eye. In one day, we lost more than 500 women, all transported away in the blink of an eye. Actresses, models, musicians, anyone who had caught their eye was taken.
Can you imagine what it was like on the set of the last Avengers movie to watch Scarlett Johansson disappear in front of your eyes? Or to be at a concert when Ellie Goulding vanished before your eyes.
By the time we had worked out what had happened, it was too late. Our best and most beautiful women were gone. The shield was up and we had no way to get onto the island.
That was, until yesterday.
After four years of failed experimentation, we have finally found a way on the island. Our scientists have developed a small, one-man vessel capable of breaching the shield. I am the pilot and tomorrow, I'll be responsible for breaching the shield, taking down the scientists and bringing our women home.
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Sparks are flying, smoke is billowing through the cockpit and all I can think is I hope I can land this thing in one piece. I've successfully penetrated the barrier but in doing so I damn near ripped the ship apart. If I survive the landing it'll be a miracle. This might be the shortest and least successful rescue mission in history.
Below me the waves are calm. I set the ship on a trajectory for the beach. As the ship begins to descend, I pass out.
"Hello."
A soft, warm, female voice brings me back.
"Is anyone in there?"
I try to respond but all I do is groan.
The ship's hatch is opened from the outside.
"Oh my...you're, you're a...are you okay?"
I opened my eyes. She was a sight to behold. Beautiful, blonde and with amazing eyes.
"I am, or at least I will be," I finally managed to say. "I'm James. I'm here to rescue you."
I clambered out of the ship, with some help from my rescuer. I took a look at what was left of the ship.