The Horniest Motherfucer Ever 01

The Horniest Motherfucker Ever 01

By: DickThePimp

Totally Fake In Every Way Possible

The Horniest Motherfucker Ever... James (Me)

"I'm worried about him. He never came home."

"He'll be fine. My baby knows what he's doing. Don't worry."

Billie (Billie Eilish) sighs. She's leaning against the kitchen counter wondering where I'm at. She's been calling and texting me since last night, but no luck. Mama rubs her shoulder and smiles nice, and comforting, and sweet, trying to get Billie to relax.

My mom Kelly (Porn Goddess Extraordinaire Kelly Madison) is worried too, but she's playing it low key and cool to calm Billie down. She's baking a cake in the kitchen. Mom's an awesome cook.

She discreetly texts my half brother Spence (The King Of Queens) to see if he's found me yet. She sent him out to look for me early this morning.

Spence is my brother and all, but he's not all that helpful doing shit. He can't help it. That's just Spence.

Where am I???... Well.......

About a dozen or so empty Budweiser cans, and an empty gallon jug of my neighbor's moonshine, are sprawled out on the shitty motel room nightstand.

The headboard of the cheap wooden bed is banging against the wall. Harder and harder. Loud too.

My aunt Beth's nasty growls of pussy plowing gettin' joy ring out loud and proud along with the wall banging sounds from the bed.

She squeezes my waist tight with her strong legs as she squirts once again. An even dozen times so far over the course of the night. Four freaky hours of hardcore motel room incest fucking down. I'm covered in sweet pussy squirt and piss. Doused with trashy sex deodorant. (Cocky grin)

The dirty room stinks of piss, puke, moonshine, and jizz. Fucking perfect. God damn, I love messy fucking.

Beth kisses me. Messy and heated. Really fucking heated. Hugging me tight on the bed. Both of us are all fucked up on moonshine and coke... the soda and the drug.

I can still taste Beth's puke, and my piss, on her tongue. We swap spit like mad and laugh. Fucked up, and feeling fine. So damn fine. God damn, that pussy is pounding on my giant, tattooed... gold stars with white trim inked all over my massive fucking dick and balls... meat as it jizzes all over the damn thing.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh. I start jizzing too. Our combined nut flooding my super stacked blonde bbw aunt's filthy freak snatch. It leaks back out and drowns my tattooed balls, and the already drenched sheets even more.

My eyes are closed. I'm smirking. Feeling this shit. So is Beth. She lights a joint and smokes like a boss bitch while we both keep jizzing. Her strong legs slapping on my thighs. Cumming fucking rules, bitches. Yeahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

I roll off of her. Aunt Beth sticks the joint into my mouth, and rubs my belly. Tickling it with her very sexy, long pink nails. Very happy with my performance.

Beth drops her blonde head down to my cock and sucks it clean. A bunch of drops of gooey, sleazy sperm flow out onto her tongue, and she sucks them all down with a very slutty moan of jizz guzzling glee. Drunk/high, jizz guzzling glee. Oh fuck yeahhhhhhh.

My happy smirk continues as I smoke and bounce my bad ass, boss bitch aunt's blonde head on my cock. Her thick and wavy blonde hair feels fucking good. Almost as good as that mouth on my dick... almost.

How'd I get here???... Well.......

I was out last night while Billie was at work. I ran into my aunt at a diner at the beach and one thing led to another. She blew me in the van out in the parking lot, and we ended up in this stank ass motel room after that.

(Belching)

I guess I got caught up in partying with Beth and didn't hear my phone. We ended up so fucking drunk and shit, I didn't even remember I had a phone. Horny motherfucker shit.

After Beth sucks me cumless, I spend the next hour or so deep sucking her milky-white boob mountains. All natty 38Fs. I fucking love her massive knockers so damn much. I'm totally obsessed with them. They're so fucking enormous and delicious.

Beth's very happy, smokey smirk as she rubs her world class rack all over my face while I suck 'em senseless shows just how much she loves me obsessively sucking on them too. Nasty bitch. I fucking love you. (Very happy/sleaze king smirk)

Over at my best friend Max's pad...

"Mmmmmmmmmmm. Yum!" Max (2 Broke Girls/Kat Dennings) has her head hanging off of the end of her couch. Her long, dark brown hair hanging to the floor. She's loudly sucking off her boss... Billie's too... Bob's hefty and pale, mature rod while he's leaning over and diddling her pussy on the sofa. He's eating it too. Really munching on that fucking thing. A morning 69er for ball busting horndog hottie Max.

Max's very jiggly 34DDs are wobbling around in her loose gray tee shirt while she greedily sucks some big dick and gets her beautiful pussy eaten.

A few minutes later, Bob is fucking Max on the couch. She's kissing him and squeezing his big and hairy, mature butt as he power drives that big Santa cock mostly balls deep up Max's heaving, drooling snatch.

Max plays with Bob's white Santa beard, and moans like crazy as she gets pussy plowed on her sofa. That ten plus inch, thick and veiny, old man cock is really doing a job on Max's honey hole. Rockin' it real fucking good.

Bob grins and keeps on plowing as Max's happy, horny moans get louder and louder... and sluttier. She starts playing with Bob's pierced nipples. Pinching and twisting them nice and hard. Pulling on them too. Wickedly grinning at the fat old stud when he groans with joy.

His left hand grabs onto Max's boob and squeezes. Max smirks away. Blowing a big bubble with her gum and popping it as she starts cumming.

Bob plows her harder. His big, whitish-gray hair covered Santa... his nickname... beer belly jiggling along.

He puts Max's legs on his shoulders, squeezing her soft, luscious titties hard, and fucks her still spewing twat faster. The couch creaking like crazy from the heavy force of the fuck.

Max screams out and smiles so naughty. Chomping hard on her gum as her pussy gets royally ravaged by her Santa boss. Ho, Ho, Ho, bitches.

Just then...

(Knocking on Max's door)

Max ignores the knocking. She can feel Bob getting ready to splooge her violently vibrating honey pot any second now.

(More knocking)

"WHAT?!?!?!"

Max yells out in frustration at the interruption. Her hot slut smirk is still blazing though. She's playing with Bob's white Santa beard while his hefty dick throbs harder and harder inside of her. He's definitely ready to splooge. He squeezes Max's tits even harder as he gets ready to cum dump.

"Max, open up. I need to talk to you." It's Billie.

Max rolls her eyes, but answers back.

"HOLD ON... OH GOD!... HOLD ON... WOO!!!"

(Loud sofa shaking noises)

Billie giggles in the hall. She can hear the nasty fucking noises popping off inside.

Billie waits in the hall for a few minutes. Then, the door opens. Max wickedly grins, chewing her gum. Happy and pleased. Freshly fucked and splooged. Billie giggles again and shakes her head.

"Come on in." Max welcomes my wife in. Chomping on her gum. Wiggling that plump, milky-white booty on her way over to her kitchen.

Billie sits at the counter while Max grabs a beer from the fridge. She gives Billie one too.

"So... what's up?"" Max takes a gulp of beer and belches. Smirking away. Playfully bouncing her eyebrows at her friend.

"Have you heard from James? I haven't heard from him since he came by the bar last night. I'm worried about him. Kelly told me to relax and everything, but I'm still worried. She said James is OK. I'm just worried since I haven't heard from him since last night. He always calls me when he's out."

"Nope. Kelly's right though. If there's one guy on earth that you don't need to worry about, it's your hot stud hubby. That gorgeous guy can handle anything... especially bitches."

Max smirks again and winks. She's walks by Billie and heads to the bedroom. Belching away as she drinks.

Billie giggles again. Shaking her dark haired head again too.

"Hey, doll." Bob greets Billie as he walks over to her. He hugs her. He was in the bathroom when Billie came in.

"Hey, Bob. I thought Max was fucking Steve (Her boyfriend)." Billie playfully grins. She sips her beer while Bob chuckles.

"Nah. Just ol' me." They both laugh.

Bob and Billie chat at the kitchen counter while Max is in her bedroom calling me to see if I'm OK.

I don't answer the phone in the motel room because my aunt and I are passed out in the tub. We got in to clean up and fool around, but we only accomplished the fooling around part. I sat at one end of the tub, drinking and smirking like a villain, and aunt Beth sat at the other doing the same. She had my dick up her snatch and she was pumping it back and forth nice and steady, rubbing and smacking her hard as shit clit the whole fucking time. Winking at me and blowing me hot bitch kisses.

I pulled out and started pissing all over those giant juggernauts and on her smirking face, then I just sorta nodded off to sleep. So did my aunt. Oh well. Rough night last night. Ha.

"Damn... Where is he?" Max asks herself. Like I said, she and I are best friends, so she worries about me too. She plays it cool around everyone, but she really does worry about me. Especially when I don't call or text when I'm out all night. She's a cool-ass friend with very special benefits for sure. And, they're some sweet-ass benefits too. (Horndog chuckle)

Back at the counter...

"Mmmmmmmmmmm. You've got great hands, Bob. You really do." Billie's relaxed and smiling. Eyes closed.

"Well thank you, gorgeous. It's my pleasure."

Bob's large, lusty grin as he massages Billie's shoulders is getting larger as his big hands creep a little lower on her upper body.

His easy going charm and cool personality has gotten Billie to relax for now.

Billie is braless under her black hoodie. And that excites ol' Santa Bob big time. He keeps looking down at my wife's big and jiggly, hoodie covered jugs, and grinning. Licking his lips too as he keeps up the shoulder massage.

Billie coos and grins happily from the shoulder massage as she and Bob chat. A couple of minutes later, her eyes pop open with surprise when she feels Bob's big hands cup and fondle her big tits through her hoodie. Massaging them just as good and as thorough as he was doing her shoulders.

Billie doesn't protest the tit massage. It's not the first time ol' Bob has had his hands on her gorgeous jugs. Santa Bob is a horndog... like the rest of us. A really horny horndog... yeah... like the rest of us. A nice guy. Charming too. An easy going party guy. He also has an ability to get chicks to fool around with him that you wouldn't think he would be able to. Chicks just dig him.

Bob's also very handsy. He's always got his hands on some titties or pussy or ass... or all three. Ha. And, the gropee never seems to mind. That's just Bob. It's his gift.

He's felt up Billie at work several times. He's even done it at a few parties too. Gotta love booze and drugs. Bob's very good at it, and he's a cool dude, so he doesn't push it. Billie told me she let him titty fuck her twice at work for his birthday. And, she gave Bob a handjob once too for him giving her a ride home. My bitch is a real cool chick. She definitely knows how to thank someone. (Smirking)

Bob's cupping and kneading those 34DDs and flicking his thumbs across those hard, throbbing nipples through the hoodie.

Billie licks her full lips and moans. Smiling nice and slutty. She's really enjoying being felt up by Santa Bob.

Max comes back into the room and mischievously smirks. Blowing another bubble and popping it. Her arms folded under that incredible rack of hers. She watches her big beer belly having, 72 year old boss, who just fucked her, feel up her other best friend.

Max confidently strolls over to them, smirking wide and cocky, chomping on her gum. She smacks Bob's butt though his baggy white sweatpants and squeezes that big ol' Santa booty. Her cocky grin growing from ear to ear.

Billie looks at her and grins herself. Biting her bottom lip and moaning more as Bob increases his big titty kneading. Getting rougher with it. Really working over those heaving hooters. He runs his hands up under Billie's black hoodie, and bare breast kneads them now. Pinching her very hard nipples and bouncing those gorgeous tits in his hands as he roughly gropes them.

Max playfully bounces her eyebrows at her friend, then drops to her knees, yanking down Bob's sweatpants. His beefy, old pale cock riddled with thick veins down the shaft is half hard and jumping in Max's face.

She licks at the tip, then bites it... playfully. Sucking it in. Slapping the underside of the spongy crown repeatedly with her tongue. She sucks it deeper when Bob thrusts it further into Max's mouth. Banging it against her tonsils.

Max starts loudly slurping and bobbing on Bob's cock. Spit starts to roll from the corners of Max's mouth. Bob growls, and Billie moans. The threeway suck and groping session continues... and heats up even hotter...

Meanwhile... at home, in my bathroom...

"God yes!! That's my baby. Fuck mama's pussy, you naughty, naughty, gorgeous stud. Yeahhhhhhh. It's so damn good! WOO-HOO!!!! YES!!!! OH MY GOD, YES!!!!!!! OH GODDDDDDDDDD!!!!"

When I finally made it home, mama greeted me with a huge, happy hug, grin, and tons of hot mama kisses. We had a beer and some cake, and I explained everything to her. We enjoyed a few laughs about it. And... we ended up in the bathroom fucking in front of the mirror. Mom bent over the sink. Me behind her. Hardcore banging her juicing coochie pot like a turbo charged, crazed sex fiend. Both of us watching it all in the mirror. Blowing nasty kisses back and forth to each other. Oh helllllllllllll yeahhhhhhhhhh!

Mom's all natty 34FFs hanging under her. Tightly gripped by my loving hands. Furiously jiggling around as I pound her pussy out from behind. Driving my hips hard into mom's booty and thighs. Coochie thumping her gorgeous brains out. Squeezing those perfect fucking titties tight, rough, and nasty. Smirking at her in the mirror. Mom smirking back. Her face blazing with pure animalistic sex fury. Fuck yeah, bitches! Fuck! Fuck! Yeah!

Mom squirts. Screaming loud. Cumming hard. Spewing her milky nut all over me and the bathroom tile. Fuck! I'm intoxicated by her. I keep slamming into her. My giant tattooed rod excitedly pounding as it violently takes that pussy and owns that shit. Yeah, bitch! Owning my mom's cunt! Thrusting deeper. Throbbing harder. Fuck!!! I squeeze those otherworldly titties so fucking hard! Mom screams out again. Smiling so big and so fucking happy. So turned-on. So horny for filthy son cock. And, her white trash sex king son's giving that shit right fucking to her! BOOM!

When I cum, mom's on her knees, fiercely sucking me off. Swinging her long blonde hair around and grunting wild. My cum erupts down her throat. She's got me swallowed all the way down. Gulping my sperm shake out and down with ravenous cum whore delight, swallowing as fast as she can, and sucking so fucking intense for more!!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOO! HOT FUCKING DAMN!!!

I hold mama's head on my dick. Grin away. And cum away. Feeding my number one bitch her favorite fucking meal... my sperm. Gooey, creamy sperm. Glob after glob of it. Letting her suck me spermless. Nothing left in my tattooed nut sack. Not a fucking drop.

Mom winks at me. Nasty and naughty. Her mouth fully stuffed with tattooed son dick. What a beautiful fucking sight too. I take a pic in the mirror.

I have to piss, so we make our way over to the toilet. My cock never leaving my mom's sucking mouth. My very wicked grin signaling what's next. I pull out of mom's mouth and start pissing in the bowl. She laps at the stream with a very nasty bitch smile. Sucking my golden dick wine up as it erupts out of my piss slit. She giggles and winks at me again, and I smirk back as she sucks me all the way back down her throat again. Sucking down every last fucking drop of piss left in me. Every single damn drop. I piss a lot, and mom very happily drinks it all. Her throat bouncing from swallowing so much piss, so fucking fast.

Dude, I lean my head back and grin from ear to freaking ear. Holding mom's beautiful blonde hair as she bobs away on my pissing monster. Moaning such deep, slutty moans of joy as she drinks my pissy load. Slurping loud and nasty. Swinging her head around. Grunting and moaning wild and freaky as shit. Absolutely loving being my cum and piss dump whore. Best fucking mom ever!!! EVER!!!

Back at Max's pad...

"Yummy balls, Bob."

"Thank you, doll."

Max chows down on Santa Bob's big hairy balls. Slurping each one into her mouth and sucking away. One at a time. Tickling under them as she sucks. Max's full, voluptuous lips pursing so hot around each ball. Her tongue welcoming each into her mouth with slow, slutty licks around them.

Billie's jerking off Bob, gripping snug and pumping steadily on that big old dick, while he sucks away on her amazing boobs. Sitting beside him on the couch while Max is kneeling in front of Bob on the floor, slurping and sucking perfectly on his fat, whitish-gray hair covered nuts.

Ol' Bob can't stop smiling with his mouth full of my wife's milky-white tits. He's in heaven. Getting his nuts sucked by a gorgeous, big titty brunette and sucking on a big titty blonde beauty's heavenly rack. Big titty heaven for Santa. Ho, Ho, Ho to that. (Naughty smirk)

Back at home...

My sister Kate (Supermodel Kate Upton) stopped by my room while mom and I were snuggling in bed. She wanted to check on me after last night. Her idea of checking on me jives perfectly with mine thankfully. She crawled into bed with us, and wrapped those big natural breasts of hers around my tattooed member and fucked it with the most gorgeous smile on her face. Blowing me sweet sister kisses while she titty fucked my dick into pure sexual euphoria. God damn! My big sis has the softest titties.

I close my eyes and smile. Breathing easy and deep. Mama giggles and starts licking my neck and cheek. Purring away. Knowing just how much fun I'm having.

Kate shakes her super soft titties on my lurching, enormous rod, and pumps it faster and faster. Licking the precum pouring out of my piss slit, then pursing those perfect, voluptuous lips and sucking my thick crown as she fucks the rest of my very happy cock with those incredible boobs.

When I cum, mama is sucking my jizz out while Kate rubs her big, natural titties all over my cock and balls. Then, my mom turns her head to me as I film it and pulls Kate to her mouth. Tilting her blonde head back, very wickedly smirking away. She drools my pearly-white goo right down into my sister's open mouth. They kiss and cumswap. Playing with my sperm between their mouths. Driving me wild. Laughing and rubbing on me as they so beautifully make-out with my goo. Hot damn! That has to be the hottest sight ever! I just shake my head. Growl. And, film it. Loving my family and my horny fucking life more than ever. Woooooooooooooooooooo. Ha. Oh yeah. Woooooooooooooooooooo.

Back at Max's...

Billie closely watches Max suck on Bob's fat old meat while she tickles his hairy balls. Billie's moaning happily as Bob continues sucking on her very luscious, large tits. Her nipples are so hard in Bob's mouth. Twitching away. So stimulated.

Billie heatedly sucks on her bottom lip. Closing her eyes for a second until Max grabs the back of her head, surprising my wife, and kisses her. Fucking Billie's tongue with her own nasty slut one.

Billie goes along for the ride. Submitting to her best friend's dominant tongue and delicious lips. Billie's eyes roll back in her head as they kiss with such intensely slutty joy.