That I May Be Weak

Hi! Can you believe it? Fanfic is now on literotica!! I was quite excited when I saw that. This is a little piece I wrote as a present for a friend of mine, and yes, it's the same me from the other places. I own nothing, but the ropes in my bedside table and the words in my head that demand to be let out.

And this is in the Hunger Games universe(canon), several years after Katniss realizes that life can be good again.

Thank you sohypothetically and norbertsmom for all that you do!!

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*****

Do you love me enough that I may be weak with you? Everyone loves strength, but do you love me for my weakness? -Alain de Botton

Katniss is standing at the kitchen sink watching Emma and Teddy play in their playhouse. She loves being a mom; she really does, but there are days where it seems that they just take everything from her. Its early spring, so she can't go hunting just yet; she doesn't want to interrupt the mating season. She doesn't really have to go at all. The butcher in town is Delly's husband who moved here from district ten; he has enough connections so he always has fresh meat for his new home district.

She is so lost in her thoughts that she doesn't even hear Peeta come in behind her. He brings his arms around her front and pulls her to him. He nuzzles her neck and kisses her.

"I need a break," she whispers.

"Do you want me to call Delly? Do you want them to spend the night?" he asks.

"See what she says. If she doesn't mind them spending the night, tell her we'll take hers next week or something."

He turns her in his arms and kisses her again. And then goes to make the phone call.

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Katniss is waiting in the study when she hears the front door close. She hears him take off his boots and come down the hallway towards her. She knows that he can see that the light is on from where she has the door only half open. The door starts to open and he softly says, "Katniss?"

She doesn't say anything, but loves the look on his face when he sees her sitting in the desk chair with her ankles propped up on the desk and all she is wearing is his old apron from before the games. It's stained, and torn in some places but it's clean, and it, for some weird reason, helps her to know that no matter what happens, life will go on.

He comes into the study, his eyes never leaving hers. "Mrs. Mellark, what is on your mind tonight?"

She lowers her feet from the desk in front of her. Yes, this is the desk that Snow sat at and threatened her, but she and Peeta redeemed it one weekend. They have made love on top of this desk so many times, neither one of them can remember the number. Katniss has a feeling that their son was conceived one morning while she was bent over while Peeta worked up a morning sweat pounding into her.

Peeta schools his face to remain neutral while his beautiful wife climbs on top of the desk. The apron hides what he knows so well, and he loves that it's his apron that she wears. The apron that he wore when he would watch her make her trades among the merchants. The apron he wore when he wished for the chance to just talk to her.

She sits with her knees apart, the apron pooling in between her legs. She arches her back so that her breasts push against the top of the apron, trying to come loose at the sides. She brings her hands up to her unbound hair and runs her fingers through it. He isn't sure where she pulls it from, but all of a sudden she has a rope in her hands.

"Oh, is that how you want to play tonight?" he asks.

She doesn't answer, but instead takes the rope and holds it between her palms, which are laying open on her thighs. She doesn't look at him but instead looks down at the desk between her knees. She exhales, releasing her worries from the week.

He breathes in the control that she submits to him. He studies her for a moment, taking in her beauty. She doesn't realize it, he thinks, but in this moment of weakness that she gives him, she is the strong one.

The desk that she is kneeling on is huge. Both have wondered at one time or another why it was so large. But since that first night of playing, they have come to appreciate how big it is.

He doesn't take the rope from her hands, but instead walks behind her and unties the apron. He appreciates that she is wearing it, but tonight, he wants her bare to him. He slips the apron over her head, but when she starts to look up at him he simply says, "No. You may not look at me yet." She lowers her eyes back to the surface of the desk.

He opens the drawer that has the rest of their supply of rope. He pulls out another thirty foot section that they have just for these occasions and begins to unravel it. He finds the middle and loops it around her neck, quickly making several knots between her breasts and down her chest. It doesn't escape his notice that she doesn't move or look up. He will have to reward her for that later.

He brings the rope under her, sliding it easily into her slit with the help of her wetness that is pooling there. He pauses in his work to slide his finger into her as well. Her breath catches and she relaxes against his gentle invasion. When she gives him a little moan, he pulls his fingers out and continues on.

Bringing the rope up her back, he loops it through the rope at her neck. He straightens out the remaining rope, separating the ends. He brings them under her arms, and around to her breasts. He continues to criss cross the rope until her harness is complete.

The entire time Peeta worked the rope around her, Katniss didn't look up once. He knows that he needs to reward her for that, so he lifts her chin with his finger and kisses her with all of the passion he is feeling. They come apart with a loud pop. Her silver eyes are alight with lust and he smiles knowing that it's all for him.

"Shall I continue tying you up?"

"If it pleases you," she answers, letting him know what she wants.

He gets another length of rope from the drawer. "Lay down. Put your bottom near the edge of the desk."

She can't help the shiver of anticipation that runs through her, as she lies down, allowing him to spread her legs. Using simple knots, he ties her legs to the desk, and then her hands. She tests the hold that the ropes have on her. When she feels how snug, but not tight they are, she relaxes into them.

He looks back down into the drawer, and she knows what else is in there and she quivers with anticipation. He reaches in and pulls out one of his old ties from the victory tour, and covers her eyes and ties it.

He presses a kiss to the side of her mouth, and without a word, he leaves the room. They have played this game enough that she knows by now that he does this to help her relax. She takes a couple of deep breaths and starts to feel the worries of the day fall away. She lets her mind go blank and her other senses take over.

She thinks she can hear him moving around in the kitchen, even though the study is pretty much sound proof. She jumps when someone caresses her cheek. Relief floods her when she hears Peeta laugh. "I surprised you, didn't I?"

She licks her lips and says, "All these years of living with me, and you finally learn how to walk quietly, sir." She adds with a smirk.

"I can be quiet when I need to." She can hear the smile in his voice, so when she feels the sharp slap on her breast, her breath catches and adrenaline starts to pump through her veins. He pinches her nipple and twists. Not to ignore the other breast, he pumps it several times. This time he keeps it in his grip, and bites the nipple. She releases a shattering breath, and when he releases her breasts, a small moan escapes her lips. "Did you say something, kitty?" he asks using the name he only uses when they are playing like this.

She stutters, "No, sir. I just miss you touching me, sir." The first slap of the belt gets her attention. He has never done this to her before and she isn't sure if she likes it. The second slap of the belt against her breasts doesn't sting like she thinks that it might, if anything, it makes her more aware of her arousal. The fifth slap is harder than the firsts ones were, and the sixth one, she knows is going to leave a mark. He pauses for a moment to touch her. She can hear his breathing change when he realizes how hard her nipples are. He licks around them and bites her hardness. She answers with a groan, and he gives her a couple more licks with the belt.

He leans down to whisper in her ear, "You look so beautiful right now. Your breasts are so red, they look like ripe apples ready to be picked. And your nipples are just like perfect wild strawberries." He licks one of them. "And just as sweet. I don't think I've ever seen them so hard before. I want to—" he bites the other one, and she arches her back into him, trying to get him to take more of her into his mouth. She pulls at her ropes, wanting to run her fingers through his hair. Meeting frustration, she wiggles her body impatiently. He pulls away, and she misses the warmth that goes with him.

She feels his touch in-between her breasts, trailing down her stomach to her belly button. His finger circles it and then continues the trail to her slit. Instead of diving in, to find her clit, he pushes her lips together. She thinks he is going to start kissing her, when she feels the slap of the belt there. She jerks against the ropes holding her, trying to cover herself. Her heels thump against the wood of the desk as he continues to beat her.

Tears, which are hidden to him behind the old tie, flood her eyes. As humiliating as this is, she can't help but to enjoy the warmth that is starting to overtake her from her core. He pauses for a moment to pull apart her lips, and very lightly, with the tips of his fingers, starts to tap her clit in a rapid succession. Her breasts and her sex are boiling with heat that she has never felt before. He slips two of his fingers inside of her, and she can hear the wetness as he pumps his fingers in and out of her.

It's now his turn to groan. He quickly replaces his fingers with his mouth. He gently sucks and bites on her clit, and she feels the warmth of her orgasm starting to peak. He pulls away, and gives her several little slaps again. A sob of pleasure escapes her lips and he pauses. She can feel his gaze and isn't surprised when he asks, "Are you ok? Is it too much?"

She shakes her head against the wood of the desk. "Oh no, sir. Please don't stop." She pleas.

He kneads her breasts, and he traces the little welts with his fingernail. A strange mix of pleasure and pain shoot through her, and she can feel her orgasm build again. Suddenly his voice is in her ear, asking, "Can I try something? Do you remember our safe word?"

There is so much flowing through her right now, that all she can't do anything but nod. He unties her completely, but leaves the rope harness and the blindfold on. She slowly moves her legs, and when he picks her up, she starts to wonder what he is doing, but then he flips her around so that her breasts are laying on the desk, and her feet are on the floor. They have done this before, so she spreads out her arms to get some leverage, when instead he caresses and even squeezes her butt cheeks. This only adds to the warmth, when her thoughts are interrupted by a loud crack across her ass. She chokes on her next breath, as he brings the belt across her again. On the third slap, her breath comes out with a sob, and the fourth one isn't as hard. He stops, and before she knows it, he is pushing his dick into her.

Oh how she loves the feeling of him inside of her. He pauses for a moment, enjoying the feel of her, then he begins the slow teasing that he knows will soon drive her even closer to the brink. He leans over her back, and presses his mouth to her shoulder. "I was going to do more to you, but I can't help myself. I need to be inside you."

Before she can answer him back, he bites her shoulder, and sets a punishing pace, bringing her to climax quickly. He releases her shoulder, and slides out. He pulls her upright, and then turns her around. Picking her up, he slides her bottom onto the edge of the desk, and then drives himself in again. She lays back onto the desk, while he continues to fuck her. She quickly cums again, and instead of cumming inside her, he pulls out and cums on her breasts.

She feels his essence and brings up her hands to rub it in, as he removes the blindfold. There are still tears on her cheeks from the spanking her gave her, but when he sees the look in her eyes, he knows that she enjoyed every minute of it.

"I can't move," she croaks up at him with a lazy smile.

"I know." And he gathers her gently in his arms, and carries her upstairs to their bathroom, where their big bathtub waits. Quickly, it fills up with water, and he eases both of them into the water. He sits her in his lap, in between his legs, with her back to him.

"Was that, ok?"

With her eyes closed, she lies back against his chest and nods. "Yes, sir. Did you like that?"

Before he can say anything, his length bobs along her back. She laughs and says, "Well I know he did!"

And they share a kiss, and relax, enjoying their bath.