That 70s Show - Eric's Christmas Tree

A fictional story about fictional characters.

This is another interpretation of Season 1-Episode 12 "The Best Christmas Ever".

*****

"So what are you doing on Christmas Eve," Michael Kelso wanted to know.

"Oh, you know," Eric Foreman answered, "my parents are having the same old boring party they do every year and I'll be stuck singing The Little Drummer Boy."

The "gang" was just sitting around in the Foreman basement, as usual, but this time they were watching How The Grinch Stole Christmas on TV, remarking at the size of the Grinch's butt. "Yes, there is nothing that says Christmas like a big green Grinch ass," commented Fez, their foreign exchange student friend. Eric and Stephen Hyde were intently and lasciviously watching Donna Pinciotti standing on a step ladder hanging beer-can ornaments on the basement's silver aluminum tree. More specifically, they were watching her shapely, jean covered ass. She was a gorgeous redhead who had lived next door to Eric for his entire childhood, and everyone knew they were attracted to each other, but there was not yet an official commitment. Hyde hoped to change what seemed to be a pre-destined coupling, and claim Donna as his girl.

Kelso's self absorbed girlfriend, Jackie Burkhardt chimed in, "my favorite thing about Christmas is shopping." Jackie was as cute as a china-doll, but the only reason she was a part of the group was because she had latched on to Kelso.

Kelso added, "my favorite is the presents. What's Christmas without presents. You know what I really like...Lite Brite..it's fun to make things with Lite Brite."

Always the practical one, Hyde contradicted, "naw, cash is the best present. Donna, let's say you had $6 to buy a gift for someone, what would you get?" Hyde tried to pry an answer out of Donna, hoping to get a hint of what to get her to trump whatever Eric was giving her. Donna sidestepped the question and told him the amount was inconsequential, as long as the gift was from the heart.

All week Hyde had been asking people what was a good gift for a teenage girl. Midge, Donna's mother, had said that Donna liked "White Shoulders" perfume, but it cost about $12 a bottle; she added, "it's not just for shoulders, you can put it anywhere." It was easy to see where Donna got her good looks because Midge could have been a Playboy centerfold and every male in the neighborhood lusted after her.

When he asked Jackie, she quipped, "you know if you want to make out with me, the answer is probably, no."

The next day while his parents and sister, Laurie, were sitting around the kitchen table discussing the party plans, Eric casually asked his father, "since you're having a party, I was wondering if I could have a party for my friends in the basement?"

When Red answered a simple, "OK," his mother and Laurie nearly fell out of their chairs with surprise. "Well, every year he just mopes around here like it's the end of the world; he might as well be down there."

Kitty, Eric's mother, was disappointed, "well who's going to sing the high part on The Little Drummer Boy now?"

Laurie pouted and complained, "it's not fair, why does he get to have a party?"

Feeling a natural high, and knowing he was on a roll, Eric pushed his luck and asked Red, "you know I could use some money for the party."

Reaching for his wallet, Red surprised him by saying, "here's $40, you go and get our tree...whatever is left over you can have for your party."

"Oh Dad," Eric whined, "you know I hate all that haggling."

"Haggling is the American way," Red told him, "and you better get a good one."

When Eric told his friends about the party, they were ecstatic. Kelso had, what was for him, a brainstorm, "Eric, we go cut a tree on the side of the road and we keep the whole $40 for beer." Hyde agreed and they easily convinced Eric to follow their plan. Finding a secluded parking spot just off the interstate, the trio of Eric, Hyde and Kelso soon found a great evergreen and proceeded to cut it down. As they were loading it onto the Vista Cruiser's roof, Eric yelled at Hyde for "writing his name in the snow" so close to the tree.

Kitty loved their choice and said it was probably the nicest tree they had ever had. It was agreed that Kelso should purchase the beer since he knew the guy at the convenience store and could probably get a good deal. Eric didn't want someone recognizing him and reporting it to Red, and Hyde had just turned 18 and didn't have an official ID yet. Red knew they were technically old enough to drink, but definitely not mature enough. The group received more good news when they found out Red was going to have to work Christmas Eve at Bob Pinciotti's appliance store. That meant he wouldn't be checking up on them. Bob told Red that "Bargain Bob's" would be the only store open on Christmas Eve because you never knew when some husband would realize he forgot a gift and run out to buy a refrigerator at the last minute.

"What a dumb ass," Red muttered to himself. It rubbed Red the wrong way to know Bob would be at his Christmas Eve party, and Red wouldn't, but he agreed because since being laid off at the plant, he needed the money.

On the evening of the party, Kitty was busily preparing food and drink for her own guests, as well as Eric's (even though he had asked her not to). Laurie, still envious of her little brother for being permitted to have a party, decided to attempt to sabotage the gathering by emptying an entire bottle of rum into the punch bowl. Kitty brought the plate of cookies, and Laurie carried the punch bowl down to the basement; just missing Kelso coming through the outside door with two cases of beer (Old Milwaukee, of course). "Mom, I told you no punch," Eric reminded her.

"You can't have a party without punch," Kitty explained, "that's just insanity."

"Yeah Eric," Laurie prodded slyly, "Mom went to all the trouble of making it...so drink a lot," knowing that if Red caught them drunk, there would be Hell to pay.

Kelso nearly injured himself jumping over the sofa to greet Laurie. He knew her reputation and his hormones would not let him pass up an opportunity to get into her panties. He found Eric's older sister to be incredibly sexy: everyone knew she never bothered with a bra and the way her small breasts were jiggling inside her sweater proved tonight was no exception. "Hey Laurie," he started, trying to be extra suave, but could not think of anything else to say.

"Hey Kelso," Laurie teased him as she thrust her chest forward.

Kelso was about to proceed when Fez burst through the cellar door with an armful of gifts. Kelso became all flustered and blurted out, "presents...I thought we said no presents."

"No, you said no presents," Donna reminded him, "what would Christmas be without presents."

"Awww man, now I've got to go out and get Jackie a gift or she'll kill me," he announced nervously. Then turned to Laurie and tried to calmly add, "yeah Jackie...who I'm dropping, by the way."

As he turned to leave, Laurie offered him some punch, which he refused. Not having any luck with the spiked punch, Laurie gulped down a cup full herself before heading back upstairs.

Just missing Kelso, Jackie arrived with three of her cheerleader friends and introduced them as Lisa, Jenny and Tracy. They were like clones of each other: cute blond and egotistical. Fez's eyes widened when he saw the trio of desirable girls and he immediately introduced himself. Tracy asked if they had anything to drink and Fez jumped at the opportunity to get them drunk, "oh yes...we have beer."

Tracy responded, "no thanks, don't you have anything else."

Disappointed, Fez answered, "yes we have some punch, but wouldn't you rather have beer."

He reluctantly served the cheerleaders cups of the fruit punch and they all began to drink freely. Not being used to alcohol, in no time they began to feel the effects; and soon Fez was sitting on the sofa between Tracy and Lisa, with Jenny leaning over the back massaging his shoulders. Fez was in heaven as they fawned over him and his foreign accent. Lisa admitted, "you sound like Ricardo Montalbland."

Jenny giggled, "you said Montalbland."

"No I didn't," Lisa disagreed and began to rub Fez's thigh, "say something slow Fez."

Grinning from ear to ear, Fez slowly recited, "hello my darlings."

As the cheerleaders began to giggle, Eric, Donna and Hyde stood by the Foreman's chest freezer sipping beer and agreed, "what's wrong with the pep squad tonight, they're acting extra stupid."

The only food at the basement party was Kitty's Christmas cookies and some chips, so the alcoholic punch and beer was being absorbed directly into the blood stream of the guests. Eric, Donna and Hyde had lost count of the beers they had consumed; and Fez and the pep squad were drinking the punch like water on a hot summer day. Lisa began to massage the inside of Fez's thigh and suddenly she drew her hand back like it had touched a hot stove, and she just stared at Fe's crotch. "Oh my God, what is that ," she gasped and Jackie and the other two cheerleaders bent to see what she was talking about. There was a huge bulge growing downward in Fez's right pants leg. It looked like he had a salami stuffed in his pants and it now descended almost to his knee.

As the trio of blondes watched, they could see it twitch inside his pants. Fez had a look of fear on his face like he had done something wrong and was going to be punished, but the drunken cheerleaders were fascinated by the outline of his erection as it grew. Tracy added her tiny hand to Lisa's and they gently touched the bulge through the fabric; timidly squeezing and rubbing it. Jenny came around from the back of the sofa and kneeled between Fez's legs, spreading his knees as she rubbed his inner thighs. "I don't know about you," she said to her fellow cheerleaders, "but I've got to see it."

Without even wasting words, Tracy unbuttoned and unzipped Fez's trousers, while Jenny grasped his waistband and began to tug his pants and boxers down his legs. Fez, now smiling like the Cheshire Cat, lifted his butt up off the sofa to ease Jenny's effort and sat back down to bask in their attention. Jenny removed Fez's loafers, took hold of his pants legs and jerked his pants (and boxers) completely off. The girls collectively gasped, and Lisa exclaimed, "holy shit," as they stared at Fez's groin. Fez just smiled.

The cock laying against his leg was of monstrous proportions: it was nearly a foot in length and as thick as a soda bottle with a crown like a tangerine. It truly looked like some sort of snake between his legs. All three girls were mesmerized by its size, their jaws hanging open. Lisa was the first one to move as she apprehensively reached out her hand and wrapped her tiny fingers around Fez's penis. It sprang upward in her hand and she squealed as Tracy added her hand to Fez's pole. Not to be outdone, Jenny also grabbed her share of Fez's meat and was amazed that there was actually enough cock to accommodate three hands. Jackie crawled between Fez's legs with Jenny and announced, "you know he was my friend first."

Amazingly, no one else in the basement even raised an eyebrow over what was transpiring on the sofa. Almost everyone had gone and Hyde, Eric and Donna were gathered around their wire-spool table playing "strip Rock-em, Sock-em Robots." The table was made out of a huge wooden wire-spool discarded by Point Place Power & Light. It made a great table and Kitty, against Eric's objections, had covered it with a nice Poinsettia decorated tablecloth for his party. The game was, it was boys against girl, and every time someone's "block" was knocked off; they had to drink beer and lose an article of clothing. Obviously they were all completely inebriated or Donna, in particular, would never have agreed to the terms. Everyone had lost their shoes and socks, and Eric and Hyde were shirtless. Donna had just lost again and was pulling her Christmas sweater off over her head, revealing her skimpy plain white bra.

As Eric watched Donna shake her wonderful long red hair from side to side, her ample breasts jiggling inside their cups; he thought his zipper was going to pop. Hyde reached down to adjust his erection as it rubbed against his zipper, since he never wore underwear.

"OK Pinciotti," Hyde challenged, "you're gong down...what will it be next, the bra or the pants."

Laughing and slurring her words, Donna told him, "the twins come out to play next...give it your best shot Hyde."

It was Hyde's turn at the controls and her challenge seemed to throw off his concentration because Donna's robot beheaded his in one punch. Eric and Hyde each swigged a beer and shoved their trousers down their legs. Eric was still wearing his "tighty-whities," but Hyde's hard-on sprang out in full view. "Holy crap Hyde," Donna stared at his nice seven inches, "no underwear."

"Naw, don't believe in them," he responded proudly, "it's something the establishment wants you to wear."

Eric saw Donna staring at Hyde's cock and quickly grasped the controls and bet Donna, "it's time that bra came off Donna."

"Yeah, you wish Foreman," she smiled as she maneuvered her robot. It quickly lost its head and she chugged what was left of her beer, reached behind her, unclasped her bra and shrugged it off her shoulders and down her arms. Her breasts were magnificent. A full 36 D, they hung on her chest like water balloons and with every tiny movement, they jiggled like Jello. Her nipples, already aroused, were like jellybeans surrounded by large pink areola. Leaning over the table, her nose almost touching the Robot's ring, her incredible tits actually rested on the festive tablecloth.

"Come on Foreman," urged Hyde, "you win and her pants come off." Eric could not concentrate; all he could do was stare at his neighbor's naked breasts...the tits he had dreamed about for years. As luck would have it, Rock-em, Sock-em was not exactly a precise game and with barely a touch, Donna's robot lost it's head. "Woo-hoo," Hyde rejoiced, "get em off Pinciotti." Donna stood, and without any hesitation, shoved her pants down her long legs and kicked them under the table. Her panties matched her bra and were nearly transparent, the shadow of her red bush clearly visible.

Donna knew she was drunk, but was not concerned. She would later admit a lesson: that alcohol served as a powerful aphrodisiac. Becoming more aroused by the minute, she knew her nipples were now hard as rocks, without even touching them. She had seen Hyde's penis, and was completely aware of the way Eric's underwear was tenting. Donna knew in her mind that she was destined to be with Eric, and was becoming more convinced that the time was near for her to surrender her virginity to him.

Forever the wise-guy, Hyde chided her, "looks like the carpet matches the drapes."

"Ha ha," Donna acknowledged, "just play the game." This time she was the one having trouble concentrating, as she watched Eric's penis twitching inside his underwear as he stood next to Hyde's chair. It was like his eyes had Superman's heat-vision as he stared at her heaving breasts, and they became flushed and warmer. The round lasted almost a minute before Donna lost again.

Hyde began to hum "Stairway to Heaven," as Donna stood, turned her back to the table and slipped her panties past her thighs and down to the floor. The panties seemed to take forever to hit the floor, descending her long shapely legs. Her ass cheeks were perfectly round and firm. "Turn around Pinciotti," Hyde demanded, "we won this, don't try to get out of it." Donna turned to face the winners, her face red with embarrassment. Her red pubic hair was trimmed into a neat triangle; a trick she had learned from Jackie so that nothing peeked out around her bathing suit. She had the classic thigh gap and Eric and Hyde could see that she had unnaturally long pussy lips (of course their knowledge of such things was limited to Playboy).

Pausing for a couple minutes, Donna then sat back down and told Eric, "it's your turn to get naked," as she gripped the controls.

At this point, Eric could not care less who won...he had seen his dream-girl naked, and the image would be forever imbedded in his brain. In addition to the beer, he was now on a natural high and he quickly won the round with one punch. "You won Foreman," Hyde announced, "but she's already naked...now what."

Donna could hardly believe she was speaking up, but her surging hormones coupled with the alcohol, had taken over as she could feel herself becoming moist, "well, I guess you could fuck me." Hyde and Eric were completely speechless as they just stared at Donna, their cocks pointing straight at the ceiling.

Jackie was leaning into Fez's lap, her mouth open ready to engulf his crown when Kelso burst through the outside door with a bag in his arms, "Jackie, I've got your Christmas present."

Jumping to her feet, Jackie grabbed the bag, tore it open and cried out, "awww, hot rollers...you do love me Michael." She threw her arms around Kelso and stated, "and I have your present." Sinking to her knees in front of him, Jackie unbuckled his pants, tugging them down as she dropped. Shoving his leopard-print briefs down to his knees, Jackie grasped his hardening cock in her hand and began to lick the head like a lollipop. His penis was only about six inches and slender so she easily fit the entire length into her mouth and began to suck.

"Oh shit Jackie," Kelso groaned, his eyes rolling. Suddenly he looked around the basement and exclaimed, "what the Hell is going on here...what did I miss? Holy crap Donna...Fez, what the Hell." No one else even glanced his way. It was incredible, everyone in the basement had complete tunnel-vision; only concerned with their own activity. And when Jackie massaged his balls and squeezed; he understood, and grabbed the sides of her head to hold it steady while he began to fuck her cute face.

Jenny was lowering her blond head into Fez's lap, her lipstick coated lips stretching wide around his large crown. It was a struggle, but she managed to stuff the head into her mouth and began to roll her tongue all around his cock-slit. Tracy grabbed Fez's chin and forcefully began to kiss him, feeding him her tongue and running it all around his teeth. He moaned as Jenny fondled his scrotum and sucked him into the back of her throat. Lisa had shed her sweater-vest and shirt and was unclasping her dainty pink bra. She took Fez's left hand and placed it on her bare breast as she rubbed the right herself. Feeling the breast in his hand, Fez broke free of Tracy's mouth, looked at Lisa's perfectly round 34 C globes and announced, "boobies...I love boobies...they are beautiful."

Now feeling ignored, Tracy threw off her festive sweater and plain white bra to expose her much larger breasts. They sagged on her chest like bags and her areola were incredibly large. She put her hands under them and bounced them to get Fez's attention. He immediately released Lisa's tit and attached his mouth to Tracy's left breast, sucking the nipple to attention, as he fondled the right twin. Jenny, Fez's rod still in her mouth, began to rub the crotch of her pants, feeling herself getting wet. Lisa looked down, saw Fez's giant cock in Jenny's mouth, kicked off her shoes and began to push her pants and lacy panties down her toned legs. Her dark blond bush was trimmed into a thin "landing strip" of pubic hair (even in the 70's, cheerleaders didn't want their pubic hair showing) above her puffy lips.

Lisa had never had anything even close to that size inside her, but she was so horny she couldn't stand it and was not about to be outdone by the other cheerleaders. She pushed Jenny's head away from Fez's groin and straddled him, face to face. Feeling his prick pull free of Jenny's nice warm mouth, Fez pulled back from Tracy's chest complaining, "hey, that felt nice..." but stopped when he saw Lisa's naked body poised above his lap. Watching as she gripped his pole in her hand and lowered herself so that it was nudging against her slit, Fez gasped, "holy crap." He put his hands out and kneaded her soft tits as he stared at her puffy lips above his crown. Tracy and Jenny decided to help their friend and they hooked their fingers inside Lisa's lips and spread them wide, allowing them to surround Fez's huge crown. Fez was about to lose his virginity and his body was twitching as he waited.