Taylor Swift/Travis Kelce/Aunt Anne
Twenty-four-year-old Tommy reaped the reward of his Aunt Anne hatred for Taylor Swift and her love for Travis Kelce, a premium tight end for the Kansas City Chiefs.
My 39-year-old Aunt Anne is a huge football fan. When it comes to football, her interest in the sport exceeds most men's love of the game. A dedicated fan, she loved watching NFL football every Sunday afternoons, Monday nights, and Thursday nights. With her unable to afford a ticket to a football game that wasn't in the nosebleed seats, watching football on my big screen TV was our weekly event.
When it was time for the football game, she dropped everything to come to my house to watch the game. As soon as she arrived, after greeting her sister, my mother left the house to go out with her friends and/or to go shopping at the mall. Not a fan in the way that her sister loved football, an understatement, my mother hated the loudness of the TV blaring the game and our constant cheering or lambasting ruining her peace.
As if she was a referee or a statistician, her running dialogue of rules and players statistics were ongoing throughout the entire game. She entertained me with her knowledge of the sport as much as the sports announcers. Watching football with my aunt was like having Tony Romo sitting beside me while watching the game.
Her favorite team was, her home team, the Kansas City Chiefs. Of course, Patrick Mahomes, the quarterback, is her favorite player. Yet, as soon as she saw a closeup of him, as if love at first sight, she fell in love with Tight End #87, Travis Kelce. As if she was dating him, and he was her steady boyfriend, all of her conversation bordered around him. Travis this and Travis that, all she talked about was Travis Kelce.
'Give it a rest,' I thought. 'The man is a good player but he's no Rob Gronkowski.'
It's true, in the way that my aunt was in love with Travis, I had a man crush on Tom Brady, especially on his beautiful wife Gisele, but with him retired and divorced from her, I've been searching for another player to brag about. With him head and shoulders above any other player, there's no other player good enough to replace his football jersey. Brady until the end, like many other Brady fans, I continue wearing his jersey and his hat while watching the game. Of course, my favorite movie is 80 for Brady with Lily Tomlin, Jane Fonda, Rita Moreno, and Sally Fields.
Then, with Gisele the last of the supermodels, unless Christie Brinkley suddenly emerged from retirement looking rested after plastic surgery, and from her long-time home in the Hamptons, Gisele had no competition. Other than the fake and manufactured beauty of the Kardashians, there's no woman on the planet to replace her. Yeah, sure there's Beyonce, Scarlett Johansson, Jessica Alba, and Emma Watson, but they all pale in comparison to Gisele's beauty.
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Every time they showed Travis Kelce on camera, my Aunt Anne swooned. In the way that she fell head over heels in love with him, if she could marry him, she would. Only, he didn't even know my aunt and her undying love for him existed.
With my aunt 5'11" tall, the same height as Taylor Swift, and with Travis 6'5" tall, if they married, they'd have giant children. In the way that Donald Trump at 6'3" and his soon to be ex-wife, at Melania at 5'11" tall, they begat Barron a virtual 6'7" giant at only 15-years-old, and he's still growing.
Like clockwork, dropping everything for the game, every Sunday afternoon, Monday night, and Thursday night, our favorite thing to do, we sat together on the couch eating popcorn, drinking beer, and watching football. My aunt was not only my mother's younger sister but also, she was my beer drinking, football watching, best buddy. I loved watching football with my aunt. A football factory of knowledge, educating me at every game, she knew more details about the game and statistics about the players, past and present, than I did.
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"I want to show you something," said my aunt giving me a sexy look and a naughty smile.
As soon as she looked at me with her big, beautiful, green eyes, I was lost in her soul. In the way that she was in love with Travis Kelce, I loved my aunt. I wanted to marry her. I wanted to have children with her. Yet, with her 15-years older than me, I'd settle for having incestuous sex with her.
'How hot would that be to have sex with my aunt,' I thought?
I wished there was a Travis Kelce mask that I could buy to pretend that I was him. Yet, with me only 6'2" tall, and him 3" taller than me, my height would deceive me. Nonetheless, maybe, if I mimicked his moves on the football field, walked like him, and tried talking like him, she'd fall in love with me.
'You remind me of Travis Kelce,' I imagined my aunt saying.
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Then, with her wanting to show me something, she floored me with what she said next.
"Only, you mustn't tell your mother what I'm about to show you," she said.
She was ready to take me in her confidence over her confiding in her sister. She was ready to tell me something that my mother, her sister, didn't know, and shouldn't know. She gave me a look that suddenly frightened me and sexually excited me at the same time.
"She must never know that I showed you what I about to show you," she said with a sexy laugh. "I'd be so embarrassed."
I looked at her with curiosity while wondering what it was that she wanted to show me. Knowing my aunt's keen sense of humor, I imagined it was a magic trick. Perhaps, it was a piece of jewelry. Maybe, she got something pierced. Maybe, she had her breast tattooed with Travis Kelce's name.
'That's one tattoo that I'd love to see,' I thought.
In the way that she looked at me, I knew that it had to be something sexually inappropriate for her to make me promise not to tell my mother. Maybe, she had her nipples pierced. I'd love to see my aunt's big breasts and pierced nipples. Yet, hoping that it was something good, I had no idea what my aunt wanted to show me.
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"I have a friend who does embroidering," she said with a dirty laugh.
'Embroidering? Boring. Who cares,' I thought? 'I was ready for her to pullout a potholder, a hat, or a scarf from her pocketbook.'
Then, she shocked me as much as she sexually excited me by what she said next.
"I bought a red bra and red matching panties for her to embroider the Kansas Chiefs and their logo in red, white, yellow on my bra and panties," she said with sexual arousal.
Suddenly, showing me her embroidery, I imagined my redheaded aunt parading around the living room in her red bra and red panties emblazoned with the Kansas City Chiefs logo.
"I even had her embroider in yellow, the property of Travis Kelce on my panties," she said with a dirty laugh.
Clearly, my aunt had lost her mind over her sexual attraction for Travis Kelce. Is that what my aunt wanted to show me? Is that what she didn't want me to tell my mother what her sister had shown me? Did my aunt want me to see her embroidered bra and panties? I held my breath with sexual anticipation while hoping my aunt wanted me to see her embroidered, sexy lingerie. I'd love to see my aunt's bra and panties.
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