USS
Ajax
, Deck 2 Mid - Science Lab:
Lt Sasha Hrelle looked up from her hand, eyes narrowing across the table at her opponents and grimacing. "Hmmm... I think I have
bupkis
here."
Lt Jim Madison's broad dimpled chin lifted as he raised the ante into the pot. "And I think I'll have to upgrade the onboard Universal Translator for all your Yiddish words."
She looked over at her lover. "Understanding Yiddish is easy: 99% of it is about complaining: about the Universe, the weather, your family, your health... or a crappy hand of cards."
On her right, the Tellarite helmsman Ensign Grel clacked his hooves. "A language of mostly complaints? Sign me up." He added his own chips, as did the Tactical Officer Ensign Bump, and Nurse Okeke, a Wakandan woman with deep brass eyes and a booming laugh.
Sasha stared at the second round of bets, looking thoroughly defeated as she turned to Shanek. "Well, Ensign? Care to add the final nail in the coffin of your Second Officer?"
The Vulcan raised an eyebrow... and lowered his hand, face down. "I fold."
Sasha offered him a smile, turned to the rest of the table... and then dropped her smile as she raised again, triggering another round of bets before she finally announced, "Call."
They laid their cards down. And Sasha's Three Queens beat them all.
She chuckled as she drew in the pot. "Much obliged, dear suckers, much obliged." She glanced at Shanek again. "How did you know to drop out?"
"I recognised your attempt to Doublecock me."
All eyes turned to him.
"Excuse me?" Sasha asked, grinning.
"A term developed in early 19th Century poker strategy," Shanek explained, deadpan. "A tactic employed by a player to seize control of the pot, by offering false tells and double bluffs suggesting a weak hand, in order to lull opponents into raising, before the player re-raises, trapping other players who would otherwise have folded if the player had first raised."
"How can a Vulcan be so good at poker?" Grel groused, his snout wrinkling. "I thought your people were incapable of lying."
"That is a fallacy," Shanek informed him, rearranging his chips. "Though we strive to be honest at all times. However, within the context of the game, where deception is a necessary and accepted tool, it is not considered ethically wrong."
"I never took our Second Officer to be a Doublecocker," Okeke quipped, lifting up her tumbler of Spican flame whiskey and bringing it to her full lips.
Grel grunted with amusement. "How about it, Jim? Does Sasha Doublecock you when you're alone with her?"
Madison smiled. "I never kiss and tell."
"As your roommate," Shanek pointed out, reaching for his own glass. "I must disagree."
Sasha was moving to the Lab's replicator, now reconfigured by Madison to produce drinks and snacks instead of base chemicals and scientific instruments, but now stopped and looked back at the table. "Oh really, Shanek? And when he leaves me, does he come home to you giving you all the gory details?"
"Careful how you answer that, Buddy," Madison warned with mock portent, shaking a finger at him. "Remember, I know where you live."
The Vulcan imbibed sparingly. "Admittedly, he does not elaborate, and is never uncomplimentary towards you, Lieutenant Hrelle... except for a general complaint about the number of bites you leave on him."
Grel and Okeke laughed, their laughter doubling as the more naive Bump whispered to them, "Why would Lieutenant Hrelle bite him? Do they fight a lot?"
Sasha chuckled, knowing her relationship with Jim was the talk of the
Ajax
... and much more comfortable about it than when it all started months ago. She leaned into the replicator. "A plate of fried shuris pieces."
Moans rose from the players at the table, Grel punctuating with, "No more, Lieutenant! Please!"
"What are you talking about? You never had any of the
first
plate!"
"None of us did," Okeke elaborated. "Because shuris is awful. Looks awful, smells awful, tastes awful."
"As a vegetarian," Shanek commented. "I have never indulged in any meat products. But if I did... I still would not eat shuris."
Sasha offered them all her middle finger. "Fine, I'll have to finish this myself."
"You don't
have
to, you know," Madison pointed out delicately, rising to his feet, finishing his shot of whiskey and walking around, stretching his muscles. "You didn't have to have that first plate, for that matter. I mean, on top of that full dinner you had tonight-"
"What are you trying to tell me, Cuddles?" she challenged, glaring at him, albeit playfully.
He turned away, seemingly casually. "Nothing, nothing at all... it's just, well, I can't help but notice you're, ah, putting on a little weight."
Okeke breathed in. "Stand by for Red Alert."
Sasha ignored her. "Oh, am I?"
Madison never made any attempt to look her way, as if distracted by a wall panel. "Not that it
shows
on you, of course, but... well, it gets more noticeable when you're on top-"
She raced across the lab and leapt onto his back, wrapping her legs around his muscular thighs and her arms around his wide shoulders, roaring and biting him on the neck as he spun around in mock panic at her attack.
"I think I'd rather deal with the Caitian eating habits than the mating ones," Grel teased, grasping the table to keep it from being knocked over from the antics of the couple.
Just then the door slid open, and Lt Cmdr Kit Kohanim entered, the Zakdorn First Officer taking in the scene with a visible display of outrage. "What is the meaning of this?"
The junior officers bolted to attention, while Sasha hopped off of Madison's back and followed suit, albeit with a stance that was slightly less than full attention. "Lieutenant Commander, how may we assist you?"
Kohanim glowered at her, the folds on either side of his round oatmeal-coloured face always making him look like he was melting from his own internal chagrin at her antics. "You may assist me,
Lieutenant
, by explaining what you and these junior officers are doing in the Science Lab, engaged in unauthorised activities!"
"Unauthorised, Sir? What do you mean?"