2200 Lima
Georgetown
I'm cold.
It's dark, it's windy, and I can smell the approaching storm. Rushing down the hallway of my apartment complex and struggling to ward off the chill by pulling my jacket tighter around my torso, I'm in no mood to argue with the familiar figure emerging from the shadows. 'No, not tonight' I silently plead, all the while knowing my objections will be useless.
I could take him down. I'm a Marine, trained in hand to hand combat. I could knock that flyboy grin right off his pretty face. There are times when it's all I can do not to haul back and swing. I've pictured it many times. I could inflict some serious damage, and he'd be hampered by that damn savior complex. But then I'd have to battle with the guilt, and I'd lose that battle, and eventually we're going to have this showdown anyway, and tonight I just don't have the energy to take him down. Why try?
Did I mention I'm cold? And hungry? We still haven't spoken. I pause, eyeing him. Do I have a chance in hell of avoiding this? He must have read my mind (I hate it when he does that!) because his head dips in a quick negative shake. And then his big body is moving away from the door, maneuvering around me, blocking any chance I have of escape. Caught between my front door (and warmth) and an apparently immovable Commander Harmon Rabb, Junior and escape. I shrug. Some battles are destined to be lost. I unlock my door and shoulder my way inside. I briefly consider my chances of getting in and shutting the door in his face, but it's cold outside (damn guilt) and he's already pushing past me into the apartment.
The silence stretches as we stand in the dark. The door is shut now, and the oppressive silence closes in on us. I can hear the rush of air as he exhales, but he still hasn't spoken. Finally, I drop my briefcase and then my bag. They thud softly on the floor as I slip out of my jacket and turn, throwing it across a chair. He flicks on the lights, and I run a ring less hand through my hair, deflecting his notice so he won't notice I'm trembling.
Still silence. Fine. Better silence than the hurtful words, the yelling and screaming we're bound to be doing soon. The thought of the verbal wars ahead send another wave of exhaustion through my body. I shiver and turn, moving towards the only door with a lock in the apartment. A hot shower behind a locked door. Let him stew in his silence.
I close the bathroom door and press the lock, then turn on the shower. Wonderfully, mercifully, thick steam begins to build immediately. I strip off my uniform, paying little attention for once, tossing it into the corner. The running water is drowning out any sounds coming from beyond my bathroom door. Not that I'm listening, of course. I step under the warm rush of water and squeeze some shampoo into my palm. Working it through my hair, I try to think of something, anything, other than that large, well-built (damn it!) body out there.
On any other night, I'd play with my old friend BoB the showerhead, anything to release the buildup of tension. But BoB has often manifested as the man on the other side of the door, and I don't need any further physical spurs. Neither of us does.
Pink elephants. Think about pink elephants. No, bodies. Men's dead bodies, floating in my wake. That's sufficiently sobering.
I shut off the water and step out of the shower, toweling off. Automatically, I grab the body lotion from off the counter, and then stop, staring back at the gloriously naked and highly aroused man in the mirror. What the hell does he thing he's doing?!? Now I'm mad. I didn't ask for company tonight; contrary to popular thought, I never asked for my heart to be broken. And I sure as hell didn't ask for company in my bathroom! Where is my robe? Oh, there it is, hanging just out of reach. I turn; ready to fight a path to my robe if I have to. My hands are clenched in fists-- maybe, just maybe, today will be the day. I'll finally lose it, haul off and beat the shit out of him.
Or fall onto his monstrous cock, which is now drawing my eyes and wetting my cunt. Fuck. His hands are on my wrists pulling them behind me, and I'm being pressed back against the edge of the counter. This is painful. If I could remember how to breathe, I could remember how to move, and I could struggle.