Stern Caresses

It was Mark's second drink at the bar. He was waiting for Addison in vain when Derek came through the door. Derek took a distant seat in quiet disgust when he caught a glimpse of Mark's face. First Addison, then Meredith, and now his workplace bar. Derek had to admit leaving was one of the best ways he knew to stand up for himself. Mark was a different kind of man. He was too present.

It was now Mark's third drink. He was glad he wasn't a lightweight like Derek once was growing up, his thinking increasingly slower while trying to ignore his old friend at the other side of the bar. Mark couldn't help glancing from time to time though, just a little bit. He remembered well how Derek was always shorter than him, and how he would defend Derek against the other kids. They were inseparable, so one side of Mark always wondered whether his friend was actually doing okay in Seattle. He was always planning to reach out in the back of his head, but never felt strong enough to do it.

Derek was starting to feel his face hotter from drinking too. Even as kids, even after they had a fight, Mark would always be back smiling at his door the next day after school. Derek would hate himself for forgiving Mark so fast, but also feel relieved he was there once more. He felt a presence around him, like someone was watching, but he wasn't sure if it was just imagination.

Mark knew he was getting wasted. Deep down, he also knew no one had put up for so long with who he actually is than Derek. People got tired of him eventually, like Addison did. At this point he was just staring the back of his friend, ready to leave before he did something stupid. With a tight pain in his throat, Derek couldn't stop thinking how finding Mark and Addison together on his bed was like a thousand deaths, a grim confirmation of all his insecurities. No matter how grown up and professional he became, he would never be able to defend himself from Mark. When Mark came back, it was like every one of those sudden rushes of relief and guilt at his door after school. And after Derek finally punched him at the hospital, he couldn't help but once more feel a stronger rush, deep down desperate Mark would make one more effort to make up.

Mark felt so drunk. After all that happened he was virtually alone in a dive bar across the continent in Seattle, a few steps away from his childhood friend. What else mattered? He caught himself standing behind Derek, before sitting down on his side.

"I wasn't feeling like leaving, so I hoped you wouldn't talk to me."

"What are you talking about, Derek? You have better places to be right now, those two women are at your feet." Mark tried to diffuse the tension with banter, at the same time unable to hide his jealousy.

"We both know you aren't alone here at this bar for the lack of women after you." Even Mark's compliments were purely a projection of himself, and Derek could no longer ignore that.

"I guess I'm kind of a lone wolf, you know I wasn't made to settle down. You used to be like that too, though. Remember how we got any women we wanted back in New York?"

"Grow up, Mark. Couldn't you just stick to your nurses?"

"Look, the bar is probably closing soon and we're here looking like two drunk losers. Can we take this somewhere else? We can have a couple more drinks for the old times."

Derek was hurt, caught in his act hiding away from New York. It was too hard to say no to Mark's bastard smile.

"Where are you staying?"

They got up and paid their tabs. Mark was visiting, so Derek was in charge of the driving to his friend's hotel room. The renewed intimacy from the secluded closeness after such a long time apart from each other created significant cognitive dissonance. The closed windows and the warm drunkenness made them feel anxious and silly.

"Derek, have you been banging that blond girl? Is that why you punched me in the face like that?"

"Once a manslut, always a manslut, huh? Her name is Meredith, asshole. You're making me question going to your place with you."

"Come on, I didn't know you two had a thing. She's a hot intern! That's what I'm talking about, you still got that juice from the old times!"

"Knowing that never stopped you before."

The clock seemed to suddenly slow down, both men wishing they could put it all behind them more easily.

"I'm telling you, Addison didn't even stay with me in New York. She came right back for your dick", Mark was trying hard behind that joking macho facade. Derek nervously giggled, before taking a deep breath out.

"I guess I haven't thought of it that way yet."

"I don't know what you got there, man! I might be your better looking half, but you're the one they keep going back to."

"Stop sucking up to me, Mark."

Mark was floored. He humiliated himself trying to say everything a man wanted to hear, and still made no progress.

"Look, I'm being honest. Before you got married, Derek, it was you and me against the world. So when the opportunity showed up, I just wanted some of what you and Addison had."

The two men anxiously stared forward in silence again. Derek was mad, but he could smell his friend on the passenger seat, a slight wet dog scent perceptible at the end of a long day. After all that nonsense, he still felt strangely safe feeling that smell once again. With the taller Mark on his side no one could mess with Derek inconsequentially. Except for Mark himself.

"You know you always had it easier, Mark. I needed to grow up much faster than you. I couldn't be a bachelor with you forever, and after all that happened I realized I needed more space to grow. Now I am running for Chief here. Life went on."

"You needed more space because you were unable to hold your own."

That was a punch at Derek's guts. His ears went numb, his eyes dry, unable to do anything other than drive for a few minutes until he pulled over.

"Are we at the hotel yet?", Mark asked, worrying he went too far.

"Maybe you should get a cab."

"Wait, Derek, I'm sorry."

"Get out of my car already, Mark, this was clearly a mistake", said Derek, already unfastening his seat belt.

"Be a man, Derek! You can't even take 5 minutes of honesty from the people who actually know you. I liked you better when you punched me!"

Derek jumped in direction to Mark inside the car, blind with rage. Derek was strong, and he kept fighting even though Mark quickly immobilized him

"Calm down, man, I'm here. D- Derek, dammit, can you please calm down? You always knew I was all twisted inside, but that never kept you before from staying by my side anyway. That's it. There you go. Would you chill if I let you go now?"

Derek stayed there, his head underneath Mark's right arm, panting. Unable to react. Closer to the smell he had recently noticed. It had been hard to be away from home for so long. Mark, also panting, couldn't help but feel the warmth of Derek's mature skin. He knew very well that Derek, though slightly less strong, was as much of a man that he was, and there was no childish whim he could pull off to change that fact.

Suddenly self-conscious, Mark loosened the grip, but Derek stayed there. Mark wished his friend moved off of him already, his dick was getting uncomfortably hard in his pants. Derek laid his torso tight against it, and would soon notice how hard it was. Mark instead realized the back of his shirt underneath his sleeve was getting unusually wet. Derek was sobbing.

"Come on, Derek. Are you okay, man? Don't cry. I'm here, you know me since forever. Here. This is awkward already, man, get up. We're looking like fools."

Mark pulled Derek up from underneath his right arm. His friend's dick was also tenting the pants.

"Derek, you're right. This was probably a huge mistake. Maybe I should take a cab home and we can work this out later while we aren't as wasted."

"Did she taste good to you, Mark?"

"W- What? Derek, I said I am sorry, I-"

"Don't pretend you don't know what I am talking about. Were you able to feel how wet she got? How loud did she scream your name?"

"Derek, cut that crap. We don't need to do this, it's late and we're drunk. You're always the proper one."

Derek knew that Mark knew how hard they both were. In a leap of faith or desperation, Derek kneeled down in front of the driver's seat, and reached for his friend's bulging crotch across the handle. It was warmer than Mark's arm somehow, and twitching. Derek took a deep sniff of the crotch, this time looking for that smell at the root while his friend stayed there, paralyzed.

"Is that what you really want?"

"Mark, it's late and we're drunk."

Derek opened Mark's blue jeans zipper, now able to see the outline of the dick from up close. He had seen his lifelong friend's dick several times soft, and maybe flashed a semi-erection a couple times, but it had been too long, and he never saw it so closely and detainedly. Mark sported a thick 7-incher, thick as a deodorant spray. Intoxicated with anticipation, Derek fished out the girthy piece out of the containing white Calvin briefs. It bulged with several veins, with a particularly prominent one along the shaft. Uncut just as he remembered it. The head was comparatively smaller and thinner, with foreskin hanging at the tip despite being fully erect. It wasn't the stereotypically pretty and symmetric dick, but it hung heavy and swollen, realistically alluring with its aggressive demeanor.

Mark caught on how Derek was fascinated by seeing a hard man's dick so close for the first time. Mark could see from above his dear smaller feisty friend on his knees with shining eyes and a half-opened mouth, so thirsty and hypnotized. That prompted an unexpected tenderness in him, besides the novelty and shock of it all. He wanted to please his friend, to give him his best given the fuck up he always was.

"You wanna taste it, buddy?", asked Mark smiling. Derek looked up like a deer in headlights, scared to vocalize any answers and confirm anything that could not be taken back. "It's okay, man, I would never judge you. I'm in this with you at this point. You liked the smell of it, might as well taste it." Derek reacted with two uncertain head nods, still looking dazed.

Mark took the cue and gently but firmly grabbed his friend's soft salt-and-pepper hair with his left hand. He didn't have many opportunities to feel it without looking awkward in public. With his right hand, he grabbed his dick from Derek's hand and slowly stroked it, exposing the vividly pink and wet head. Then, he swung it from top to down and offered the exposed head to Derek's nostrils.

"Here. I know you've been wanting this all night. It's okay. He's such a drooler, ain't he? I'm all wet already. All for you tonight." Derek was now glaring at the pink head, concentrated, still with a half-opened mouth and his heart pounding at his chest. "I'll show you how it feels on your skin." Mark then nonchalantly rubbed his dick across Derek's face cheeks so his friend would get more used to it, then softly beat him with the pulsing rod. "Wanna taste it now?" Derek took the chance and swallowed the less intimidating head. "Fuck. You're making me so horny, dude. You like the taste of it?" Derek looked up again and nodded with the dick head in his mouth, less scared but pleading. Mark realized both had no experience with the weeds of male to male sex, and at that night Derek's beginner blowjob would never equal his many experienced hook ups. He liked Derek so much, though, and Derek seemed to want him so bad. Mark looked back lovingly at his friend's expecting eyes and decided that night would not be about himself.

The taller friend felt the soft hair through his left hand fingers once again, and then clenched at them more firmly this time. He then shoved three more inches of his dick inside his kneeled friend's mouth, taking out a gasp of the latter who then closed his eyes and grabbed the top's hips. "Watch out your teeth! Try and cover them with your lips." Derek, now panting, once again nodded with half of the dick in his mouth. Mark proceeded to move half of his dick in and out of his friend's mouth, in a slow but steady pace. He now sported a larger smile when Derek once again looked up. "See, I knew you could take it." Mark kept the pace so his friend would get used to the sensation of having his mouth full of meat without chewing. Derek kept his jaws mostly loose, spit starting to overflow his mouth after some minutes. "You're making my dick so wet! My balls are dripping." Mark noted smirking with a hint of sadism.

He then aggressively pulled Derek's soft hair through his fingers and shoved more of his dick length towards his friend's throat. Derek started to gag and blushed, bringing out an amused chuckle from the top. Mark pulled out a little bit so his buddy could breath more easily. "Damn, that just felt so good on the head. Your throat just gripped on my dick. I'm gonna get in again, baby, but you can just pinch my leg if you feel like you're throwing up." Mark now was freer to vary the speed and depth through that wet hole. He would stay with shorter and steady strokes, then surprise Derek with a slow hard punch on the throat. "I know you haven't done this before but let's try something. Breath deep through your nose while I'm fucking your mouth, and when I hit your throat you either breath in or try to swallow. Ready?" Derek grabbed his friend's strong glutes harder, anxious for what was gonna come next, but complied. He wanted to see how much further he could go to lodge Mark inside of him, hugging him with his throat.

Mark thrusted his dick head deeper, but gently and Derek swallowed in. The sensation was weird, the latter felt as if he was throwing up but he didn't. His gagged harded, his throat unusually tightened up. "Let's try again, buddy! Take a deep breath through your nose and relax when I go in again. You're taking it so well! I know you can do it." Mark did it again, and this time the head went through an inch or two more. Derek felt satisfied with the breakthrough, but also immediately scared with having a rod filling up his throat. He couldn't manage to breathe, having a hard time using his nose exclusively. Mark suspected that was going on when Derek squirmed and tried to back up, but he stayed in stroking his friend's throat gently a few seconds more, firmly holding the head on both of his hands so he could show nothing bad was going to happen. Then he backed out completely, and let Derek finally catch his breath. Spit was dripping off of his chin. "Are you okay? You did amazing for a first time!"

Derek was breathing heavily, his chest moving and his eyes startled. Glad to be able to breathe freely again, but missing the sensation of having his mouth hole filled. "Did you- Did you really like it?" Mark looked down reassuringly. "Of course, baby! Look how hard those veins are still jumping!" The truth is that there was a lot of teeth action. Still, he was happy to give Derek something his friend secretly wanted. Mark thought to himself he should definitely appreciate those nurses and their restroom blowjobs more. They did a good job, having the stamina to climax him.

"You can suck on it however you want now!" Derek got excited to test his new skills, and went down again tentatively licking the spit back from the underbelly of the shaft, then nursing on the head with his eyes closed. Mark was proud, now rubbing his friend's head with a male sternness. "You liked it, didn't you Derek? It's okay. I loved it too. Show me how much you liked that thick dick. Yeah, kiss on the head, buddy." Mark caught on his friend's crotch, with an unusually big bulge and a small wet spot towards the right. "I guess I never saw you fully hard like that, man. Are you packed to move back to New York or just happy to see me? That's a heavy package right there." Derek stopped sucking and looked up somewhat embarrassed. He hated how his unsuspectingly big piece turned him up whenever he got horny.

Mark stretched Derek's collar up a bit so he could dry up the remaining spit on his dick, then put it back on his pants. "Hey, I don't care, this was great. I would understand if you want us to each go home and pretend it never happened though. A few minutes ago you didn't even want to talk to me." Derek remained silent, still looking lost with open dreamy eyes looking past Mark's groin. "We could also finish this at my hotel room tonight if you want to, of course. It's been a while since I saw your dick. I'm not gonna lie, I'm curious. We could compare them." Mark pitched with a grin. Derek gulped and looked up at his taller friend, coming back to reality.

"You're an ass, Mark." The blond man's heart sank a little bit, regretting to indulge in this adventure. "Where is your hotel again?"