Shakira. She of Colombian-Lebanese descent, hot Latina looks and recently blonde hair. She also had a killer body and, especially, a killer ass. Always encased in either leather or Spandex, it always moved as if it was a totally separate entity. It was also a smelly ass as, while not as publicly known as, say Jenny McCarthy, Sarah McLachlan or Tyra Banks, Shakira was a farter. At the end of each show, her band and singers would have to use oxygen masks to get air while the stage was fumigated.
Neil was a casual fan of Shakira for over a year and liked her music. He also had a bit of a crush on her, although unlike others, he was not exactly obsessed with her. He did have her CD "Laundry Service", as well as one or two Spanish CDs, and a poster on his bedroom door. One day, he received a letter informing him that he was the owner of a "Lucky Ticket" which allowed him backstage after Shakira's next show. Neil looked over the ticket approvingly.
"Very cool," Neil smiled to himself. "I can't wait."
The show was an awesome, two hour-plus fiesta with little Miss Ass Shaker doing her thing with her Spandex-encased ass shaking it and the crowd eating it up. After the show, Neil went backstage and showed his ticket to the bodyguard outside Shakira's dressing room. The ex-football player nodded and allowed him to enter. Shakira was reclining on a sofa with a bottle of water in her hand, dressed in a white tank and reddish-brown Spandex tights with black lace fringe. A smiled creased her lovely features as she took a gulp of water.
"Welcome," She greeted. Her voice was soft and low with a noticeable accent. "I take it you are Neil."
"I am," Neil replied. "Great show, by the way."
"Gracias. May I see ticket, por favore?"
"Sure thing." Neil obliged and handed it over.
"Congratulations. You get to be part of my staff for rest of tour."
"Very nice. What do I do?"
FRAAAAAAAAAPPPPPP!!! ROOOOOAARRRTTT!! Two rather swampy-odored farts serenaded Neil as Shakira giggled, waving her hand in front of her ass. Neil raised an amused eyebrow, yet he obviously did not seem to object too strongly.
"Mi perdon. I do that a lot. Especially onstage."
"Hey. Some things can't be helped. It actually smells kind of nice."
"Gracias. What do you do? You are, how you say, 'bum sniffer'?"
"You want me to sniff your ass?"