This is a Earth Day contest story. Please vote.
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Taking a beat down for God, supermodels misunderstand their Earth Day modeling assignments.
Christie Brinkley was the first to appear for the photo shoot, an Earth Day commercial for Pita Breads, a new bread, even lower in carbohydrates and calories and made with all natural ingredients. Since she's always dieting, she was happy to model for a product that she actually uses. Moreover, glad to get the modeling job, that would undoubtedly be made into a commercial, being that she's now 57-years-old and nearly thirty years past her prime, modeling opportunities and commercials are now few and far between.
Yet, just as she was when she was younger, she was always excitedly early for her modeling assignments. Looking so much like the wide-eyed giddy girl she was, when she first started modeling at 19-years-old, she looked 37-years-old and not 57-years-old. Then, when factoring her immaturity and naiveté, no one would correctly guess her age.
"I owe my beauty to my good skin and because my mother is a dermatologist," she enjoyed telling everyone and anyone who'd listen to her endlessly talk about herself. When she wasn't saying the word, me, she was saying the word, I. Yet, both words were dwarfed by her favorite phrase, "I don't understand."
With everyone having already heard the story of the secret behind her beauty, so many times before, there were fewer who wanted to hear it, whenever she told it again. Not believing any of her denials, other models and the public in general were sick and tired of her saying she was a natural beauty and never had Botox injections and/or plastic surgery. Even now, so many years later, with so many younger and more beautiful models around, Billy Joel's Uptown Girl's favorite subject to talk about was still herself, a topic she never tired of discussing, so long as there was someone there to listen. One day, no doubt, years from now, with her head still held high in the clouds, much in the way that Zsa Zsa Gabor talked about her beauty and her lovers and in the way that Jack LaLanne talked about diet and exercise, until the day he died at 96-years-old, Christie would still be her best supporter and most vocal promoter.
Long after her beauty faded and her skin wrinkled, she'd make for a good Miss Dinsmore in another remake of Charles Dickens' Great Expectations. Long after her star faded, with an ego bigger than her phony breasts, in the way she still regards herself as a natural beauty, the eighth wonder of the world, a superhuman supermodel, she'd even make for a good Gloria Swanson.
"I'm ready for my close-up, Mr. De Mille."
Once called the most beautiful woman in the world and still so very stunning, but more importantly real and approachable, Cheryl Tiegs was the next model to appear for the photo shoot. Had she not been so open and honest about her age, by her youthful and rested appearance, no one would have guessed or even suspected that she was 63-years-old. Certainly, she looked twenty years younger. With makeup hiding her wrinkles and lighting her kind friend, she still vehemently denies that she's had any plastic surgery and no one has ever come forward to say that she has.
Part of her sardonic personality, Cheryl always had the look of cynicism and silent sarcasm on her face, especially when appearing with Christie. One could tell from afar that even though they were friendly, they weren't friends, just as it was obvious to discern that one was just a talking head and the other was intelligent. Christie was in her own fantasy world and Cheryl confronted reality with a warm embrace, an experienced expectation, and a knowing smile. If Cheryl wasn't smirking and making snide remarks that went over Christie's head, then she was rolling her eyes and letting out sighs of disbelief at some of the things that Christie said and did, especially when the camera was off the both of them.
"Hi Christie," said Cheryl giving her a hug. Cheryl's 6'1" frame and taller with heels, dwarfed Christie's 5'9" height and taller with heels. "How are you?" She showed Christie a sincere interest that Christie, with her self-centered and selfish nature, was unable to reciprocate.
"Oh, I'm fine now that I got rid of my fourth husband for cheating on me with that young slut," said Christie. She typically said things without thinking and generally gave out too much personal information that she invariably regretted later, albeit always too late, after it made good fodder for the tabloids. "Now that I think about it, it's funny."
"What's funny, Christie?" A long list of funny things that Christie did and/or said over the years ran through Cheryl's head.
"My fourth ex-husband's name is Peter and this modeling session is for Pita," she said with a laugh. "What a coincidence?"
"Yes, that is uncanny, startling, actually," said Cheryl suppressing a laugh, while rolling her eyes already.
"How are you?" She flashed Cheryl her plastic, trademark smile and turned away without even waiting for her reply.
"I'm great," shrugged Cheryl with a tired been there and done that look that comes with the experience of age and the wisdom of reality. "I'm just happy to be working again, even if I have model naked. Only, they're going to have to airbrush the Hell out of my 63-year-old, wrinkled body to make me look halfway decent," she said with a laugh. "My Sports Illustrated days have been replaced by AARP cover shots," she said with another laugh. "I'm just glad that I'll at least be holding a sign, hopefully a big enough sign to cover my sagging breasts," she said cupping her breasts with her hands and supporting them with an exaggerated oomph of a lift, before laughing again.
"Naked? What do you mean modeling naked?" Christie looked at Cheryl, as if she was joking. Not the brightest bulb on the runway, as dim as the empty look that darkened her eyes, when not on stage and off camera, the other models were always teasing, making fun of, and playing practical jokes on her. "Why would you think we'd have to get naked for a Pita commercial?" She forced out a laugh, while looking at Cheryl, no doubt, to see if she was pulling her leg again.
"Duh, Christie? You've never done an Earth Day PETA commercial before?"
"No, this is my first," she said shaking her head, as if verbally answering Cheryl's question wasn't enough and she needed to shake her head, too, as proof that she never did a Pita commercial.
"Oh well, then, your agent should have told you that you must pose naked. I'm surprised she didn't tell you. I used to have her as a modeling agent and she's usually very specific and thorough."
"Well, I'm not getting naked for a Pita photo shoot, that's for sure. That's ridiculous," she said with a shrug and an upturn of her still beautiful head. No doubt, she had too much cellulite to hide or, perhaps, she didn't want to reveal that she had some recent plastic surgery done to correct her breast implants. "Those tit and ass cheesecake photo shoots are over for me. Somehow those photos always manage to get posted on the Internet."
"Suit yourself," said Cheryl with a shrug, "but the modeling fee is triple our normal supermodel rate, which is why I agreed to do it. I can use the money. Besides, what does it matter? Except for my grandchildren, which I don't have yet, I don't care who sees me naked now. I'm so beyond that. It's just skin."
"Triple the fee, huh? Wow. I didn't know that. Maybe that's why my agent didn't tell me that I'd have to pose naked. Only, I never figured I'd have to remove my clothes for a stupid bread commercial," said Christie with an annoying snort and then a horse of a laugh.
"Bread commercial? What are you talking about, Christie?" Cheryl rolled her eyes and gave her a patient smile, as would a mother give a naive daughter. "This isn't a bread commercial, Christie," she said with a laugh, this time.
"Yeah, it is. It's for the new Pita bread commercial, lower in carbohydrates and calories and made with all natural ingredients. I eat it all the time. I love it. It tastes so yummy. The new promotion coincides with the Earth Day celebration. There's a new save the Earth logo on their wrapper that reads that five cents from every purchase is donated to save the whales."
