Twisted Depraved Fuck Parody Series
*Where is this guy? He's an hour late."
"I don't know Katie. Just start the introduction to the interview and maybe he'll show up."
*Whatever... Hello everyone... I'm Katie Couric. I'm here to interview a man called The Most Controversial Person is Entertainment. He's also been called quite a few other... even harsher names. He's a very interesting and complex man... and at the same time, he's very direct and simple minded in his approach to living his life. He believes in having fun and making the most of his life. That includes a lot... and I mean a lot... of women. He also has no limits or boundaries for his sexual debauchery. He does what he wants... when he wants... and who he wants... it's his life them. He's James... and he's my guest... And he's finally fucking here." Katie's cameraman can't believe she let that slip., but she saw me pull up... at 140 mph... in my pimped out green and gold, retro, super charged pimp van.
I open the window. "Get in baby doll." I tell Katie.
"Baby doll?" Katie looks at me, her eyebrows raised.
"Get in or I'm leaving. I'm in a hurry." I tell her. I get right to the point.
Katie quickly jumps in the front passenger seat. I pull off quickly, before her cameraman can get in. I speed away from the hotel. "You forgot Bill... the cameraman..." Katie looks back towards him, as we speed away.
"No I didn't. I didn't wanna take him with us. Damn... you look good baby. Fuck... you've got great cans." I compliment Katie... who's wearing a skin tight, brown, sleeveless top and mini skirt combo with brown heels as well. He shoulder length, dirty blonde hair is tied in a ponytail. She's got my 14 inches all excited and shit.
"Well thank you... I guess. How are we gonna do this interview? Could you please slow down? This is very dangerous... OH MY GOD!!" Katie grabs the dashboard nervously, holding on... for dear life... as I speed though the LA traffic.
"Let me see your tits babe. I'm a tit man. Spence (my cousin Spence from The King of Queens) wants to see em too. Ain't that right Spence?" I look towards the back, at my cousin.
"Ummmmm... yeah... sure." Spence looks at Katie with a cautious, meek smile.
She looks at him and shakes her head, befuddled. This interview isn't going like she planned. She decides to just use her phone for the interview. She starts filming with it. "You wanna see my breasts? I'm married James. That's not very professional." Katie tries to stay calm... she groans... wondering why she wanted to interview me.
"It is for me. Seeing a chick's tits... especially beautiful ones like yours... is pretty much my job. C'mon baby... you're gorgeous... you're tits are gorgeous. You know you want to. I can see that little slut twinkle in her pretty eyes baby. Here... have a beer." I hand Katie a Budweiser. She takes it. I smirk... happy she took it. She downs about half of it, then puts it down.
"A little slut twinkle in my eyes? Thanks." Katie lowers her head, shaking it... disgusted at me... and herself for doing the interview.
"It's a compliment babe. I wanna fuck you... so a slut twinkle is a compliment. You know about my reputation. I see the way you look at my crotch. You want tha Supa Dick all up in you baby doll. We both know it." My brazeness takes Katie by surprise... even though she knew how I was. She knows I take who I want... when I want them. I always get the girl... always. My grandma Martha (Martha Stewart) instilled that in me... and I instilled my 14 inches in all her horny holes. She took my virginity, many years ago. I love that woman so damn much. She's my mentor... sexually and otherwise.
Katie shakes her head... smiling now. She's intrigued... and turned on... by my unabashed cockiness. I know who I am. I can get any woman I want... and like I said just now... I always get them. I'm greedy, cocky and horny as fuck. I'm the Sex King... and I definitely fuckin' prove it.
I smoke my blunt... and make my way through the hell pit that is LA traffic. I'm headed to LAX to pick up my cousin/wife pornstar Lisa Sparxxx. She's been on a gangbang tour... 50 G's a pop.
I hand Katie the blunt... she takes it, but doesn't know what to do with it. She doesn't wanna smoke it while she's working. She finally gives in and takes a big toke on it. The van is filled with sexual tension and smoke, so I let the windows down.
"Nice van. It's very 70's ish." Thanks baby. Yeah... it's retro. $150,000 van. I like it. I have a couple of them. It's my pimp van... it's good for fuckin'. The bed in the back is real comfortable. You'll find that out for yourself, shortly." My unabashed cockiness at work again. I give Katie a big grin and take the blunt back to smoke.
"I will huh? You're a pretty confident guy... pretty damn cocky. I'm married... and I'm here to interview you... that's all James." Katie looks at me with a strong, bossy vibe. She's trying to take control of the interview... but I'm the alpha male 24/7, so she's gonna be out in her place.
"Baby... I don't five a fuck if you're married. As a matter of fact... that makes me want you more. I love bangin' other dudes chicks. It fuckin' turns me on. I knocked up Spence's girlfriend. Did it for free too. I get paid for that shit baby. Ain't that right Spence?"
"Yeah... I walked in on James and Denise. I had gone out to the store and I come back and James is plowing her doggy style on my bed... I live with him. It turned me on. Denise was screaming and cumming... her big tits flopping wildly, as James plowed her pussy with his massive cock. I jerked off watching it. He fucked her for three hours straight. Pissed all over her too. I licked her clean... and him."