My Desperate Fan Fiction

I often said that warm summer days were made for Wisteria Lane. There was nothing better than working in my garden all day, and then relaxing while my husband Paul cooked dinner on the barbeque, and Zach swam in the family pool. Sometimes we'd invite friends over to join us, and Paul never once complained. Well, almost never...there was one woman on Wisteria Lane who Paul tried to avoid as much as possible...

Edie Britt opened her front door, and walked out onto her porch. She was wearing a short silk robe, a thong, and nothing else. She knew she had a body to die for, and didn't mind showing it off—while keeping a pretense of modesty though, hence the thong. While she sipped her coffee, she watched as further down the lane she spied the door to Susan Mayer's house open. Susan was carrying a breakfast tray in her hand, and Edie knew that she was going to scurry across the street and bring it to Mike Delfino's house. Edie sneered at the thought of Susan spending the morning with Mike, and secretly hoped the dumb woman would trip before getting to her final destination.

Edie and Susan had been vying for Mike's heart for years now, and Edie was loathe to admit that her ditzy neighbor was winning the contest. And Susan didn't play fair. Edie suspected that whatever breakfast meal that Susan was bringing to Mike had actually been made by her daughter, Julie.

And that's when it happened. Susan tripped on the curb, and the breakfast went flying all over Mike's front lawn. Edie chuckled, and then flashed a fake sympathetic pout and friendly wave when she saw Susan look around, probably hoping that nobody had seen her latest disaster. Edie was certain that Susan's face went bright red, but she didn't stay to watch, and instead turned around to go back into her house.

Edie shimmied out of her thong the moment the door was closed, and she then lay down on her living room couch. She unfastened her robe, closed her eyes and bit her lower lip as she ran her fingers along the slope of her full breasts, and circled them around her hardening nipples.

"What do you see in her?" Edie said with a huff. "I've heard Karl's stories. She was lousy in the sack!"

Edie then traced her hand down her slim belly, nearing her freshly shaved mound. In her mind, she pictured herself walking up Mike's driveway, and spying him working in his garage. She'd come up as quietly as possible, and then surprise him with some sultry comment. "Working up a sweat, are you?", or something along those lines. She pictured Mike turning around, and giving her a lopsided grin. He'd say something about enjoying working with her hands, and that would be the opening she needed.

On her couch, Edie ran her hands down between her legs, and traced them up and down the slit of her pussy, before teasing her cit. In her head, she pictured herself approaching Mike, and telling him she enjoyed working with her hands too. She'd drop to her knees, and undo Mike's jeans before he could object, and she'd pull his cock out of his pants. It would be flaccid at first, but she'd take it in her mouth, and start bobbing her head up and down. She'd tease Mike with both her tongue and her teeth and she'd sigh in delight as Mike's cock stiffened in her mouth. That's when he'd take charge, and start fucking her face.

"Oh, yes," Edie sighed on her couch, and quickened the speed and force with which she flicked at her sensitive nub. She could feel her pussy warming up, and fought the urge to finger herself. "Not just yet," she whispered to herself.

In her head, she had her hands wrapped around Mike's ass as he continued to fuck her mouth. She imagined Mike's breathing becoming more ragged, and that's when she would break away from him. "Not just yet," she'd say, and stand up. She'd quickly strip off her short shorts, and Mike would marvel at how prepared she was by going commando. Next, she'd jump up on Mike's work bench, and spread her legs for him.

Edie gasped as, on her couch, she finally slipped her fingers into her drenched pussy. She began to finger herself fast and hard as she imagined Mike, his hard cock plowing into her pussy. In her mind, she saw herself wrapping her legs around Mike's lower back, pulling him in closer as he fucked her harder and harder.

"Fuck me, Mike," Edie moaned both on the couch, and in Mike's garage. She could feel her pussy tighten around her fingers, and knew that she was close. When the orgasm rocked her body, Edie screamed out loud, not caring if those damn Scavo kids heard her. She'll probably get a lecture from Lynette, but those brats needed an education.

In her mind, she pictured Mike pulling out of her before shooting his hot load of cum on her belly, and her dripping pussy. She pictured pulling Mike in for a long deep kiss, and leaning her head back as he then proceeded to kiss her neck.

Edie's post orgasm glow was interrupted by a knock on her front door. She sat up, and quickly tied up her robe. Lynette was quick this morning. What had her twins been doing, spying at her through her front window?

She opened the door, and instead saw Susan standing there, a sheepish look on her face.

"Mayer," she said by way of greeting. "I saw your fall, and I'm not sorry to say, but I'm all out of band-aids."

Susan shook her head. "It's fine, Edie. I was just wondering. Do you happen to have any Eggo waffles?"

Edie smiled sweetly. "Why, Susan, yes, I do." She then slammed the door in Susan's face with a laugh.