Driving a limousine in Los Angeles over the past few years has brought me into contact with a lot of well known personalities. Now and then, the contact is more intimate than you might imagine. Now, don't misunderstand me. Not every celebrity I meet takes me to bed. Usually it's a job like any other. But tell me, what stories would you rather hear? Me, I'd rather make known the tales of the tails I've known.
One enjoyable memory involves actress Demi Moore. The chauffeur normally assigned to drive her was on vacation and I had been given the job. I was required to be available during the entire week, rather than just on call and as was typical for such an assignment, I was utilizing one of the company sedans rather than a stretch limousine. Using such a car meant there was no barrier between driver and passenger, which makes talking easier.
Throughout the week, we became increasingly at ease with each other and ended up talking quite a lot. The subjects were usually very general, things such as Southern California and the entertainment industry. By Tuesday afternoon, we had already logged over a hundred miles and her heavy schedule kept things at a hectic pace all week.
On Friday, the last day I would be driving for her, she had a mid-day meeting to attend out in Palm Springs, about a two hour drive each way. The plan was to leave her home at 9:00 A.M. and return home that same afternoon. When I arrived at her house, things were in a chaotic state. Ms. Moore was trying to get herself ready while at the same time riding herd on her children. She apologized when she opened the door, explaining in a rush that her housekeeper had been delayed.
I offered to distract the tykes while she finished getting ready, an offer that was quickly and gratefully accepted. I spent a few minutes telling them stories of the supposed "UFO" landings near my childhood home of Rosewell, New Mexico, stories they listened to with fascination. Soon enough, the housekeeper arrived, Ms. Moore was ready and we were on our way.
Once we were on the freeway and making good time, Ms. Moore commented that she had heard me telling the kids my stories. She too was from Rosewell and we both agreed we were equally glad to have left the area behind us. This seemed to lower some barrier between us and her conversation became increasingly frank. She spoke about her pending (at the time) divorce from her husband, Bruce Willis and it seemed to make her melancholy, especially regarding the effect the separation had had on herself.
Apparently the children spent most of their time with Ms. Moore and this limited her time outside the house. She didn't sound regretful about the situation; merely disappointed at how lonely her life had become. I found myself feeling sorry for her and tried to be as sympathetic and attentive as possible. We made good time on both legs of the trip and by late afternoon we were back in the Los Angeles area.
Once we reached her home in Brentwood, she asked me to have the car ready in a half an hour, at which time I drove her to drop the kids off with her husband for the weekend. After we made the drop-off, she asked me to take her back home. As was the case earlier in the day, she was very quiet and seemed to be pretty depressed.
I wondered what I could say to help her feel better, but sometimes the best thing to do is nothing at all. I therefore left her to her thoughts and took her home without incident. Because I had been working out of her house, I had a few personal items to retrieve from the house and accompanied her back inside. I gathered up an extra uniform shirt, a small kit bag and a few books I had brought along to keep myself from getting bored. Once I was ready to go, I walked towards the kitchen area where Ms. Moore had been heading last time I saw her.
She was sitting at the table with a cup of coffee, gazing forlornly out the window. I was still unsure if I should offer any words of sympathy but she looked so alone I asked for some coffee as well, simply for the sake of saying something. She jumped up and quickly filled a cup for me, guiding me to the table to sit down with her.
We made small talk for ten minutes or so and I noticed her spirits picking up. I was kind of puzzled by that, because we really were talking about inconsequential matters. However, I had no idea of what was on her mind. After I finished my drink, I stood to go. Ms. Moore told me to wait just a moment, that she wanted to give me a special thank you for my help that week and then she disappeared from the room.
I heard her footsteps going upstairs and then waited for almost another ten minutes. I was just wondering if I should go check on her when I heard the stereo blaring from several rooms away. I wandered out towards the main entrance and stopped in the doorway of a large living room, stunned by the sight before me.
To my amazement, Ms. Moore was dressed in a pin striped suit exactly like the one she removed in the movie "Striptease", complete with hat and high heels. She was doing a slow bump and grind type dance, obviously using the skills she had developed for that same movie. Her movements continued until the song ended just a few minutes later and when she turned towards me, I realized she had known I was watching. She grinned as she walked towards me and asked in a seductive tone what I thought.
I made no immediate answer, entranced as I was at how sexy she looked in what was essentially a man's suit. She took my forgotten belongings from me and tossed them aside before taking my hand and leading me to a nearby sofa.
"I've always wanted to do some dancing for someone I hardly know," she purred huskily. "You are the perfect candidate and I can't think of a better way to say thank you for your help this past week."
I was shocked at the proposal, but certainly not in any objectionable way. I had watched her dance on the screen more than once, using the fast forward and rewind buttons repeatedly. Now she wanted to give me a real-life show? "Shazam!" I thought to myself as she led me to a seat on a large sofa.
Demi walked over to the stereo, swaying her hips as she did so. She pushed a few buttons, then stood in the open area of the floor in front of me, separated from me by a small but sturdy looking coffee table. She turned her back towards me and gave a very seductive look over her shoulder as she waited for the music to begin.