So, as dead as it left her feeling inside, Parker Posey did the only thing she felt she could do. She dated that star quarterback, made her best effort to develop a taste in men, and suppressed her Sapphic urges. Parker made herself the woman she thought those around her wanted her to be. At the expense of being the person she was born as.
Even when she left her family behind in Laurel for the opportunities far more liberal New York City provided her, foremost attending college at SUNY Purchase, and freedom to do as she chose was hers, she chose to walk the straight and narrow. To be the good daughter who did as she was supposed to.
But it all came at a price for Parker. Try as the training actress did to lose herself in her studies and learning her craft, she was a lonely, sad woman. She had the occasional man to keep her company, but somehow, it only made her long for a woman's touch even more strongly.
After Parker broke into "The Biz", she curbed her loneliness in different ways, going to all the industry parties and functions she could to network in hopes of fulfilling her dreams of gaining roles in which she could show what she was made of as an actress.
And she reaped rewards from her hard work, landing a regular part on the long-running CBS soap opera "As the World Turns" in 1991. She found herself in a wide variety of projects in the years after she left "As the World Turns" the following year, from the controversial in "Frisk", to the sexy in "Sleep with Me", to the hilarious in "Waiting for Guffman". Parker accepted the wide range of projects she did for various reasons. Because it challenged her as an actress. Because it helped pay the great expense of living in New York City. As a favor to a friend or connection, that would help her down the line. Most often, Parker took roles to prove something. That she was willing to take risks as an actress. That she deserved the lofty expectations she'd always lived with.
And, of course, prove things to herself that needed proving. In a couple of instances, Parker used film roles to prove to herself that her girl-liking days were over. One was "The Doom Generation", in which Parker played a deranged, hideously blonde wigged woman who had mistaken Rose McGowan's character for her long-lost Mistress. But, it was only a brief, asexual one-scene part that did little to test her resistance to women, however hard she immersed herself psychologically into her role of being another woman's sex slave. All it really did was make her wonder what it would be like, for a woman like Rose to own her body and be able to do anything she wanted to it.
After creating more doubt in her heterosexuality then, and later in a scene in "The House of Yes" in which she spent the whole time looking at Tori Spelling in a skimpy white bra and bikini, no more opportunities to test herself came until she signed on for "The Misadventures of Margaret": A film in which she played a woman who, in the process of writing an erotic novel, becomes overtaken with sexual fantasies. One scene had her character passionately kissing in lesbian fashion her bisexual friend, played by Brooke Shields. If she could survive this, she could surely put women behind her and devote herself completely to men, despite all their flaws. Then, maybe she could at least feel something real, something passionate with them.
In the end, Parker did not survive. Parker never imagined the day she arrived on the set what would come of filming this movie. Parker Posey as she had existed was defeated. Over the years, she had become such a mentally tough woman, who could put her own desires and needs aside for the greater good. But, somewhere during those days filming "The Misadventures of Margaret", all those barriers she had built up to protect her image, her career, and her family and friends from the sinful desires born of her adolescence were stripped away, along with her clothes. Parker was laid bare in every respect. And the many walls that came crashing down in dramatic, orgasmic fashion that fateful night in 1998 when Brooke Shields successfully seduced her was the best thing that had ever happened to her. It was then that happiness and freedom were finally bestowed upon a miserable and trapped 29 year old. And not a night had passed since that Parker went to sleep before saying "thank you, Brooke" for at last making her whole. But, that's another story.
------------------------------- Evening of Sunday December 7th, 2003.
It was a night of celebration in Vancouver, British Columbia for the cast and crew of "Blade: Trinity". But, not because filming had wrapped in the third movie of the Blade Trilogy, or the dailies had gone over well with New Line execs. Also filming in Vancouver was "Catwoman". A film that had been in discussion for well over a decade since Michelle Pheiffer had played Batman's latex-clad feline nemesis in "Batman Returns", except with Halle Berry filling a much skimpier catsuit.
Being in Canada, arguably the hockey capitol of the world, and the home of the NHL's Vancouver Canucks, in Late November a friendly challenger to a hockey game was made via fax, from the crew of "Blade: Trinity" to the crew of "Catwoman". The challenge was accepted, and the "Blades" vs. "Hallecats" conflict took place the first Sunday of December in the home of the Canucks, the GM Palace.
Ultimately, it was really very little of a conflict. That would imply a serious battle. This was not one, as a team of crew members The Daywalker himself, Wesley Snipes, was greatly confident in, wiped the GM Palace with the "Catwoman" crew. An outcome that would put a smile on Snipes' face when he heard the news, given his contentious history with Halle Berry.
While the man playing the title character wasn't in the house for his team's decisive win, two of his prominent co-stars were. Neither Parker Posey nor Jessica Biel donned the skates, but they were on hand in cheerleading capacity.
On screen, Parker and Jessica would be rivals, with Parker playing Danica Talos, a vampire leader with a heart as black as Parker's long, shoulder-length silky tresses were for this film, and Jessica playing Nightstalker Abigale Whistler, a young woman bent on avenging her father's death and stopping the threat raised by Dracula's resurrection. Off screen, no such complications existed between them. They were just two actresses making a movie, who had formed a friendship during filming.
Even though it ate into their free time away from the set, Parker and Biel were happy to give the support to their team that could be so motivating coming from such sexy ladies. Whether or not their presence actually helped the Blades triumph, they had enjoyed a couple of hours of entertainment on ice, after which they returned to their home away from their respective homes during filming of "Blade: Trinity", the Opus Hotel.
While the actresses had forged a bond, unlike their co-stars Wesley and Ryan Reynolds, there had been an underlying tension between them on this night. Or with Jessica, at least. Parker was just her outgoing, laid back self. Every bit the polar opposite of the high strung, not to mention high maintenance women she often played on screen. And that made her all the more annoying to the "7th Heaven" star, at this particular moment in time.
The thorn in her side wasn't stuck there by anything Parker had said or done. Instead it was staple-gunned there by what she wore to the game. Endowed with Blades team spirit on this evening, Jessica's choice of attire had been the official jersey of the Blades for this one-night-only engagement on ice. Parker, on the other hand, had gone with a Vancouver Canucks home jersey. To the Boulder, Colorado-raised, Colorado Avalanche-loving Jessica, it was bad enough that Parker wore the threads and colors of Colorado's Northwest division rival Canucks. The name "Posey" on the back of the jersey, with accompanying number 1 made it even more personal. Jessica, however, held her tongue on the issue of her supposed friend wearing enemy garb. Until they were placed in close proximity during the elevator ride up to the 6th floor where they both resided. She could take no more when Parker began whistling "Oh, Canada". Now, charges against Parker of trying to piss her off flew from Jessica's mouth, with severity. The accused responded with a "when in Rome..." defense. One not bought by her friend, who knew her to have an ever-so-slight mischievous tendency. Of course, Parker took the opportunity to have a friendly argument about hockey with Jessica, since she clearly needed some heated debate to melt ice.
However, when that initially friendly debate came around to Parker pointing out to Jessica that the Detroit Red Wings had won the Stanley Cup far more times than Colorado, there was only one direction things could go. For Parker, it was being propelled ever-forcefully forward by a Jessica shove, out into the hallway when a "ding" and opened sliding doors made it possible. As soon as Parker regained her footing following a bit of stumbling, she spun around to mock Jessica for her over sensitivity. Of course, making sure to wipe the smile of self-satisfaction of her face first. And then, with a hint of righteous indignation, she chided "damn, you Colorado Avalance fans are so sensitive", with hands on her hips for emphasis.
