This work is not intended to offend anyone. The author (me) holds nothing but the highest regard for all parties mentioned in the story/stories. It is a work of fiction, and should be treated as such. This work should not be viewed by anyone under the age of 18 (or older, depending on the legal age of the location in which this story is read.) I hold no legal responsibility, yadda, yadda, yadda, you all know the routine. Just covering my ass.
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My vacation began innocently enough, as most do.
It was spring break. Me and "the guys" were doing the road trip thing, bombing around in Ray's beat-up old wagon. Nothing but a couple of guys having fun (in the non-homosexual kind of way, of course).
Our tour eventually brought us to Hollywood, CA, where our hopes of hobnobbing with the celebs came to a disappointing halt. We must have toured the streets for ages, but we didn't see anyone worth noting. Hell, at that point, we would have settled for a few has-been actors or one-shot-wonder musicians to laugh at.
Well, making a long story short, we became somewhat disenchanted by the no-shows, and we finally parked the wagon and packed ourselves into a hotel. Nothing big or fancy, just somewhere to kick up our feet. I made sure I had my own room. I wouldn't have minded splitting a room with one of the others (probably would have been a little cheaper), but I felt like watching a porno flick at some point, and it's hard to get hard when... well, I'll just say this: my friends and I weren't THAT close.
Exhausted by the trip, everyone packed it in early. Except me, of course, because I was still wired from the cappuccino we had downed at one of the nearby cafe's. I tried to get some shut-eye, I honestly tried, but after an hour of tossing and turning, I decided there was no way I was doing any sleeping.
I knew the hotel had a bar. I'm not much of a drinker, but I thought there might be some chicks around to chat with. Who knows, I might be getting back to bed sooner than I thought! (Heh, heh, heh.) I jumped into my day clothes, locked my door on the way out and hit the button for the elevator.
*Bing!*
The doors swished open.
I expected the place to be deserted, being just after midnight... But when the door opened, there she was, as big as life. Christina Ricci. Christina honest-to-goodness-slap-me-in-the-face-if-I-be-lying-for-the-luva-god Ricci. You know, Casper, Sleepy Hollow, Opposite of Sex, Ice Storm, etc, etc, and THERE SHE WAS! She was dressed... well, I wouldn't say provocatively.. she was clad in a white t-shirt (that seemed almost 2 sizes too small... gulp!) and a pair of jeans. She obviously wasn't going anywhere fancy... probably down to get some ice.
I was flabbergasted. I mean, how often does something like this happen??
Several thoughts raced through my mind. First, I pushed myself forward both mentally and physically, practically leaping into the elevator. I calmed myself thoroughly, trying to remind myself that if I started gushing all over her, she wouldn't give me the time of day. I had to play it cool. I had to pretend she wasn't even there. I had to keep myself from staring at her breasts, oh MY GOD HER BREASTS!!! Stop that!! Stay cool, take it easy. Deep breasts - breaths! I mean breaths.
22nd floor... 21st...
Okay, just calm down. Everything's fine.
19th floor... 18th... 17th... 16th...
I was staring at the floor, watching my feet in a sort of childish way. Don't do that! I scolded myself. Not smart!! Look at her! She knows who she is, and she knows I know who she is! Make eye contact, small talk, anything!
I looked up at her and smiled. She did that same.
Okay, I thought. Good start.
I nodded, and gave my standard greeting. "Hey," I said calmly.
"Hey," she said back.
Right on! Okay, it's all good..
14th... 12th.... 11th....
I saw my opening.
"14th to 12th," I said aloud. "Superstitious nonsense. I mean, who would leave out a whole floor just because of a superstition dating back to the days of 'witches and warlocks'?"
"What do you mean?" she said, looking at me, then looking upward at the elevator floor lights.
10th... 9th... 8th....
My journey downward was almost over. The elevator would stop, and we'd go our separate ways. I had to keep her interested.
"Well, the whole '13' thing. You know, devil's dozen, 13 witches in a coven, Friday the 13th... And now this."
She smiled. "It is pretty silly, I guess," she agreed.
"Of course it's silly! I mean, why 13? Where did that whole thing start? Was there some big catastrophic event with ties to the number 13, or did everyone just wake up one day, hundreds of years ago, and say, 'Okay, from now on, everybody, the number 13 is unlucky. WE know that it isn't, but boy, will it sure freak out the grandkids!!'"
Christina laughed. JACKPOT!
4th... 3rd...
A sudden shake in the elevator cut Christina's laugh short. The shake became a violent tremor, and we were thrown to the floor. The lights dimmed for a moment, then sputtered back to life. We slowly rose to our feet, realising the elevator had come to a stop. From the look of things, it didn't seem like it was going anywhere anytime soon.
First things first. "Are you okay?" I asked. I didn't even realise I had said it, it just came out. It's the gentleman in me, I'm sure. I extended my arm to help her rise.
"I think so," she said, taking my hand. "What happened?"
"I dunno." I hit a few buttons, nothing. I tried to push the doors open. Despite my abundance of upper body strength, nothing. "I think we're stuck," I said helpfully.
"Gee, what could have given you THAT idea??"
I chose to ignore the snide remark. I had spotted something interesting anyway.
"There's an intercom here," I said. "I think we can call for help. Gimmie a sec..." After a moment or two of fiddling, I had it. "Hello??" I called into the device.
"Hello?" came the response.
"Hey, we're stuck in here!!"