Lt. Gordon's Transformation

"Personal Log: Stardate 46128.2. Lt. Jamie Gordon recording. Note: all log entries pertaining to Lt. Jamie Gordon classified under authorization Alpha Omega One Three and voice patterns of Jamie Gordon and James Gordon.

"It has been five days since I reported aboard the USS Korvan. The transporter malfunction that transformed me into a transgender individual has been thoroughly investigated and corrected, but without my original pattern I am going to have to remain as I am for the foreseeable future.

"We will arrive at the Dyson Sphere later today to begin our survey of the exterior until our sister ship arrives and then we can move on to the interior while they continue the exterior scans and remain outside the sphere to relay our observations to Starfleet Command and Science.

"Councilor Webster has requested that I start a separate log for myself to keep a record of my time as a transgender individual so that I can better understand what I am going through at this time and to track any personal changes in thoughts while I inhabit this body.

"At first I was overwhelmed by the changes in my body and thought processes following the transporter malfunction. Everyday activities that I took for granted, such as walking, talking, sitting or eating suddenly took on huge ramifications as I had to adjust to a new persona.

"Thanks to Carol, I had to turn learn all over again how to do these things so as not to revel to the rest of the crew that I had been a man prior to beaming over from Starbase 55. I know that all Starfleet personnel are trained to show respect for all life forms, but I guess we still harbor a few small insecurities regarding change. I myself, have been trying to get a grip on the changes that have happened to me.

"I am coming to the realization that if the crew found out I was a transgender person they would accept that, providing that they did not know about the malfunction. At worst I would be shunned by the crew as a freak, but that is unlikely. We are better trained than that, but it is still a fear that I have. At best the reaction I would get would be pity for the malfunction. I think pity actually be worse.

"My thought processes have been changing as well. Thanks to the increased hormones that Dr. Sportan has included in my diet I am thinking and feeling more like a woman than a man. At first this was very confusing for me but I am beginning to like it. The other night at the beach party I found myself flirting with the first office again. I also checked him out while we were swimming, God he has a cute ass. I can't believe I just said that.

"Carol has tried to convince me that it is perfectly normal for a young woman to enjoy looking at men in that manner, but I sometimes still think like the 30 year old man I was, not the 19 year old woman I appear to be now.

"Carol has been a great help. She has shown me that it is alright to be the woman I am now, but I still think that she is pushing me too fast. I understand that she has the back ground for this work, as she is a completely function hermaphrodite, but she was born that way, I was created.

"She has been encouraging me to explore my new sexuality and truth be told I am starting to enjoy it. The first time I tasted my own pre-cum was in the shower two days ago. I enjoyed the taste and almost tasted my own ejaculate, but I stopped before I could. I was completely repulsed by the idea, but only after I had achieved orgasm. Just before I came, the thought of tasting my own cum was what pushed me over the brink, but after, the guilt and disgust came through before I could. I could not brush my teeth fast enough after that shower.

"Carol found me on the couch after the shower and made me talk about it. I was horrified and humiliated that she made me admit what I had done and how I felt about it, but now I realize that I had to talk about it and that the humiliation was not as bad as I thought at the time. In fact it now that I think about it I was a little turned on by it. When we got back to our quarters that night, Carol showed me just how good cum tasted. She had me get undressed and then proceeded to give me the best blowjob I have ever had.

"When I came it was in her mouth, and she only swallowed the first of it. The rest she fed to me, directly from her mouth. I tasted my own cum and passed it back and forth between myself and Carol until she forced me to swallow it all.

"I did enjoy the taste and texture once I got over the shock. The warmth and the salty flavor helped me accept that I am a woman and that I should enjoy the taste of male semen. That it is nothing to be ashamed of.

"However, last night something really big happened. About two in the morning, the captain decided to through a red alert drill at us. I hate those drills in the middle of my night; I can't get back to sleep after one of those for hours afterward. We made it to our stations, but only just, and if Carol had not reminded me I would have forgotten my gaff entirely and shown myself to my crew. I expect they will find out soon enough, but a red alert in the middle of the night is not the time or place for them to find out.

"Anyway, after the drill Carol and I went to the holodeck again and used the Fiji program, but this time we locked it out for everyone else. Carol stripped down completely and started to sunbath nude, but I stayed in my suit. I could not help but notice how beautiful she was. Her large breasts were high and firm, her body toned and tight, and her clit soft and pretty. Somehow it looked very right on her body.

"After a while we started to talk about the incident in the shower again, as well as the blowjob she gave me and feeding me of my own semen. I admitted that it turned me on but that I was still confused. Carol told me to just relax and take life as it comes, but to do that I have to understand myself. Carol then told me to touch her.

"I was a little hesitant at first, I mean I fell asleep the other night holding her clit and we have kissed, but this was something different. I started with her breasts, touching them, rubbing them, kissing and licking them. The only instructions Carol gave me was to go slowly, women like to make love slowly. It seems that she will never stop being my teacher. The taste of her breasts was wonderful, her nipples were so hard, I thought they might cut my mouth.

"As I moved my hands down her body, I brushed the back of my hand against her clit and felt something wet. I looked down and realized that it was her pre-cum. I was intrigued. So far I had only tasted my own pre-cum and my own semen, and that only second hand. I wanted to taste someone else, but I was scared. My mind was fighting with my body again, and my body was winning. I think subconsciously I wanted my body to win. I tasted her pre-cum and was delighted with the sweet taste of it, so different from my own.

"I grabbed the shaft of her clit and started to jerk her off without thinking about it. I knew what felt good for me, so I tried to do the same things to Carol. She moaned and laid back, opening her legs and giving me room to do what I wanted, and I wanted to taste her clit.

"She is a little bigger than I am now, but smaller than I was, but that did not matter. I had jerked myself off many times before, but the feeling of holding a hard cock, or in this case clit, in my hand was different. I could squeeze and rub, and I did not feel anything on my own clit. It was very unusual. My hand was doing all the normal things it did when I masturbated, but my clit could not feel it. Finally I took the last step and took her clit into my mouth.

"The feel of her skin was like nothing I had ever felt before. It was soft and hard at the same time. Her clit was warm and I could feel the underlying hardness beneath her skin. The taste took me to another place, somewhere I had never been before. The feeling of her in my mouth sent a tingle down to my breasts and an even stronger jolt to my clit. I was still wearing my gaff, so I could not get hard, but I did not stop to take it off.

"I took my mouth off to lick her clit from top to bottom and when Carol jerked her hips I found myself face first in her pussy. She tasted even sweeter here. I thrust my tongue as deep as I could into her hot tunnel and I was rewarded with her squirting cum at me. It tasted sooooo good. I kept on jerking her clit until she came. I had to move from her pussy to her clit to capture the taste. I wanted her cum direct from the source this time.

"Her semen was even sweeter than her female cum and so much better than her pre-cum. I shoved the fingers of one hand into her vagina and stroked her clit with the other hand as I sucked the cum out of her. She sprayed her female cum all over my chest and shot her semen deep into my mouth. I swallowed it all and sucked for more. I think I began addicted to Carol's cum the instant that it touched my tongue. In fact when I was down Carol was upset with me that I had swallowed all of it.

"Carol was quite surprised when she offered to get me off and I turned her down. I came in my gaff without touching myself at all. The thrill of sucking Carol off made me orgasm on my own. The feeling of her in my mouth set off a reaction unlike anything I have ever had. When Carol came and I took her in mouth I felt a warmth in my groin and felt my balls spasm and shoot cum out of my dick, and I had not even gotten hard. I had heard of soft penis orgasms, but I had never had one before.

"Carol said that I had made a big step in accepting who I had become. I believe that she is right and I want to explore more. I am thinking of taking Cdr. Burton to the holodeck in the next few days to see if I can do the same thing to him, but I am still very nervous of the idea. I will have to talk it over with Carol first; I mean what if he wants more than just a blowjob.

"But I am worried that I am losing myself, or at least the self I used to be."