Dick's morning had started innocently enough--beginning with Kara offering to "help" Dick's prominently morning wood with a nurturing handjob...which quickly devolved into him plowing her into the mattress beneath them, the young blonde's legs kicking in the air as Dick came inside her--
And then Kara's crime-alert on her phone rung, reporting that a robot supervillain was terrorizing the nearby M&T Bank--
Then the morning got less fun.
"Metallo? Are you kidding me?" Kara exclaimed as the metallic man stepped outside of the bank doors. She crossed her arms indignantly as she exchanged a look of disbelief with Dick. "I was hoping for it to be some knock-off...what's the point in moving from Metropolis if I keep getting my cousin's hand-me-down villains?"
Dick shrugged next to her, fully dressed in his Nightwing outfit, escrima sticks in hand as he kept his gaze on the approaching cyborg. "It happens. I can't even begin to tell you how many times Scarecrow and Two-Face have 'paid me a visit' back when I was in Bludhaven..." After a moment, he paused, murmuring under his breath, "And Ivy that one time--"
"Hand-me down? That's so funny, considering you're just a weaker Superman in a skirt!" Metallo growled, his green eyes the only thing visible from his titanium shell. The rest of the villain was his usual, metallic-skeletal armor, complete with his unchanging faceplate.
"Uh huh. Like you're the paragon of originality, Metallo! It's the same old thing with you, the usual 'try-to-kill-me-and-my-cousin-with-your-Kryptonite-heart' plan!" Kara retorted. "Like, if you're gonna try to kill me, at least do something different! 'Cause it's getting repetitive." To further cement her point, the blonde cocked a hip and gestured to the full-body lead jumpsuit she had worn over her usual outfit.
And while Dick missed the view of Kara's toned, exposed tummy and how her mini-skirt would occasionally hike up her thighs, he noted that Kara's curves were perfectly filled out in that jumpsuit.
"Think you're so safe in that suit, huh? You keep forgetting how powerful my metallic form can be--for instance, it's quite efficient in crushing the second-rate Batman you brought with you!" With a guttural roar, Metallo lunged towards Dick, cracking the concrete ground he stood on, narrowly missing him by centimeters as the acrobat dodged his attack.
"Stop! Comparing me! To Batman!" Dick snapped angrily, more incensed by Metallo's dismissive label than his current attempt to murder him. "Seriously, like I get that there's a resemblance, but could you supervillains come up with something else to call me for once?" He punctuated every statement by throwing an explosive wing-ding in Metallo's face. "How am I a rip-off, wannabe, or second-rate Batman?!? I don't even have a CAPE!"
Brushing off his indignant attack, Metallo transformed his right hand into a buzzsaw, leaping forward to slice Dick's escrima sticks (and his face, presumably) in half, crying out, "You know what, you're right--at least Batman knows how to shut up! I'll fix that problem!" He grabbed Dick by the collar before he could slip out from under him, pulling the former Robin up with his left hand, positioning his face before his whirring buzzsaw.
"Says the world's chattiest Terminator!" Kara exclaimed, zooming up to crush Metallo's buzzsaw hand, and ripping out his Kryptonite heart, all in the span of a few seconds. Almost instantly, the green lights of Metallo's eyes went out.
"Thanks, for a second there I thought I was about to become a second-rate Two-Face instead." Dick quipped, landing back on his feet and brushing away from Metallo's robotic grip. Glancing up at the skeletal cyborg, he shrugged. "'World's chattiest Terminator'...okay I see it now."
"Well, I couldn't let you die after the night I just had." Kara cooed, giving Dick a naughty look as she placed Metallo's Kryptonite chunk into a small lead box she had brought with her. "Right when our relationship' starting getting interesting..."
"Yeah, uh...about that..." Dick didn't want the young woman to get the wrong idea about their newfound closeness. "Just don't expect me to show up at your place every week, I'm kinda going for a "
'spur of the moment' thing with the other girls-"
"How many other women are you seeing that aren't your girlfriend?" Kara asked in an interrogated tone.
"I lost count a while ago...thirteen...I think?"
"Thirteen?!?" Kara repeated in disbelief.
"I said, 'I think'! It's probably twelve." Dick remarked absently.
"I thought you were a pervert, no, forget that, you're a straight up man-whore!" Kara declared incredulously.
"You're not the first blonde to tell me that." Eyeing the frozen Metallo, Dick added, "And I wouldn't be so judgmental, is that guy even alive after you remove his Kryptonite heart?"
"He's alive, his body kinda just shuts down, like some kind of robot coma." Kara explained, while unzipping and pulling off the light gray lead jumpsuit. "Mm, finally some air, couldn't breathe at all in this thing!"
"I'm not sure you should take that off yet." Dick said worriedly. "And just because your ass looks amazing in that suit."
"Like your ass doesn't--"
"Ugh, that's enough!" barked the voice of Metallo, his green eyes alight once again. "I was gonna let you two turn me in so I could break out my buddies in Stryker's, but I can't stand another second of your disgusting, hero pillow talk!"
"How are you-?!?" Kara stammered, looking back at the Kryptonite piece still safely insulated in the lead container.
Before Metallo could condescendingly answer her question, Dick clicked on a device from his own 'utility belt', causing the metal man to disappear in a fiery explosion.
BOOM!
"Managed to stick a small explosive inside his armor." Dick explained to the shocked Kara. "Definitely packs more of a punch than the usual wing-ding...what? Just because I'm not Batman doesn't mean I can't learn a thing or two about being overly cautious..."
"I think you killed him!" Kara said with a hushed whisper, the scrap pieces of Metallo littering the ground around where he exploded.
"Not quite, Supergirl!" announced Metallo's voice from within the smoky remnants of the explosion. "John Corben lives...but no longer as Metallo!"
Emerging from the smoke, John Corben revealed himself, dressed in a black-and-gray jumpsuit, looking just as human as he had been before his transformation--except for the fact that his skin was glowing bright green. Kryptonite green.
"Now I am once again a man, no, more than that, thanks to the--"
"--Magic black candle that you sold your soul to?" Dick interrupted.
"Well, yes, actually--but it was quite worth it, because not only can I once again feel and touch like a man, but I maintain the strength I had as Metallo--and the weakness of my enemies!" John made a dramatic motion towards his bright green skin.
"Supergirl!" Dick cried out, managing to catch a staggering Kara from collapsing on the ground. She moaned incoherently, too close to John's Kryptonite radius to respond or move. Dick pulled her upwards and moved toward the abandoned lead bodysuit as John advanced on them, gleefully continuing to gloat as he did so.
"I hope you can hear me, Supergirl, because I want your last living moments to be knowing that your end came at the hands of Superman's deadliest foe, the Kryptonite Man!!!"
Dick instantly stopped his desperate efforts to get Kara to safety. In fact, he stopped completely to stare blankly at John Corben. "Wait...you really named yourself Kryptonite Man? Seriously?"
"Think that's funny, do you?" John snarled, his emerald-colored eyes glinting maliciously as his fists began to glow brightly with energy. "We'll see who's laughing after I take you apart, piece by piece..." Dick formulated several plans to outmaneuver Corben and get Kara back in the lead suit--and immediately discarded them all as he noticed a familiar blonde figure silently fly to the ground behind them.
"Wait! Before you kill me...please change your name so people won't say I was killed by Kryptonite Man." Dick 'begged' sarcastically.
"It's a good name!" John protested.
"No, I agree with Nightboy, that name sucks." Added the confident yet playful voice of Power Girl, in all her muscular-curvaceous glory. John turned to see the older blonde and unfazed, laughed.
"HA! It's funny, you were actually next on my list after Supergirl..." John noted with a sneer. "You just saved me the trouble of going all the way to New York again..."
Karen brushed a few stray strands of blonde hair out of her face and rolled her eyes, grumbling, "You know, it would be nice for once if the supervillain of the week actually remembered that I kick their asses on a regular basis-"
"You think you can stop me?!? You're no Superman, you're just a fatter Supergirl with an ugly haircut!"
John's rant became more and more unhinged as Karen walked closer to him, only four feet away from him. "You didn't even bring a lead jumpsuit, so make that a dumber Super..." Karen was three feet away from him. "Girl...too..." Karen was now right in his face, completely exposed to his glowing skin...and didn't look remotely weakened in the slightest. "How did...but...Kryptonite doesn't affect you at all, does it?"
"Nope!" Karen replied cheerfully, her answer followed up by her aggressively head butting John, the green-skinned man crumpling to the ground.
WHAM!
Exchanging a bemused glance with Dick, the statuesque blonde looked at him, and then the unconscious Kara. "You've been avoiding me, man-whore. Let me guess, you already got bored of me and decided to try out the younger model, right?"
"Why didn't Kryptonite affect you?" Dick asked in earnest, slipping Kara's leaner figure into her leadsuit, eyeing the unconscious John Corben suspiciously. "Thanks for the save by the way."
