Lex Luthor stood at his window at the top of the tallest building in Metropolis, admiring the vast view. It was only right that the greatest man in the greatest city in the world had the greatest view, Luthor thought. The only building that had a view to match was the one next door. It was also owned by Lex Luthor.
As Luthor admired his city, he saw a streak flying through the air.
'Finally,' He thought. A great rush was heard as the streak flew in from the roof. Luthor heard the being approach behind him.
"Is it done?" Luthor asked, not bothering to turn around.
"It's done," The being replied. "She's been released and she understand what she had to do."
"What did you offer her?" Luthor asked.
"Earth," The being replied. Luthor turned and smirked.
"Nicely done," He said, "But I still am not sure if she'll be enough to take down Batman. He's probably the second greatest human being alive." Neither needed to point out who was first.
"She'll be fine," The being replied. "Batman is still just a... he's only a man."
Luthor frowned. "Don't underestimate him. Batman is devious and he has managed to thoroughly disrupt our plans so far. He is smart, he is calculating, and he is very, very dangerous."
***
"Bleeehhhh!" Tommy ejected as he vomited off a cliff in the Batcave, chunks of what appeared to be corn passing through his esophagus and into the deep chasm. Tommy unleashed a torrent, his pasty white vomit arcing 5 feet away before descending into the darkness below. He finally finished and wiped his mouth disgustedly. He took two steps and then began to vomit once more.
Tommy... had not taken his break-up with Black Canary very well. After his surprising discovery that his girlfriend liked girls, the poor sod had descended into a depressing habit of drink. For the past week, he had taken to going out after he had wrapped up a night as Batman, hitting up the bars just as they opened and drinking until he blacked out. He usually woke up in some strange place with a killer hangover and no idea where he was.
No matter how much he drank, it never made him feel any better.
The night (morning? Tommy wasn't sure) before, Tommy had faded out of his blackout to find himself on top of a redhead. The woman was moaning while Tommy drunkenly fucked her, his dick barely hard enough to thrust inside her. She didn't seem to mind, though, as she writhed underneath him.
"Oh yes, oh yes!" The woman was moaning while Tommy plugged away. He could feel himself quickly becoming ready to cum. The woman was close, too, and if Tommy had only held himself they could have finished together. He was in no mood to be unselfish, though, and he began to moan heavily as he began to cum.
"Oh yes, oh ye- no no no, I'm not on the pi-" The woman began to say before Tommy shoved himself deep inside her and began to cum, filling the redhead's womb with seed. She went back and forth between anger and desire, as the feeling of Tommy's cock filling her up wasn't all together unpleasant.
Tommy finished cumming and rolled over, gasping for breath. The woman hopped up and ran to the bathroom, presumably to clean herself up. She was in there for a few minutes while Tommy tried to clear his vision enough to count the number of ceiling tiles in the woman's crummy apartment. He had made it to "4" when the woman came back.
"Well thanks a lot," She said sarcastically. Tommy waved at her half-heartedly with his hand.
"Now quick, you have to get out of here," The woman continued, picking up Tommy's clothes and throwing them at him. Tommy rolled over instead, trying to get some sleep.
"Please, my husband's going to be home from work soon an-" The woman began.
"Husband?!" Tommy said, quickly shooting up in the bed. He soon realize how poor an idea that was and he held his head in his hands. "You're fucking married???" He asked through the pain.
The woman had her hand to her forehead, clearly distressed. "I can't believe I did this," She was muttering to herself. "I can't let Warren find out..."
Tommy was hurriedly dressing, hopping as he tried to fit his foot through his pant leg. He finally got his clothes on and turned to the redhead.
"Look, this was fun, uh..." Tommy struggled to think.
"Mary," The woman, apparently named Mary, said angrily.
"Look, this was fun, Mary, but I don't think we should do thi-"
"Just get out," Mary told Tommy. He didn't need to be told twice. He exited her apartment, gathered his bearings, and hiked the 10 blocks to where he had hidden the Batmobile. He arrived to the huge car, unlocked it, and promptly threw up all over the hood.
This was the second woman Tommy had found himself with in the past week. It never made him feel any better.
Now, back at the Batcave, Tommy awoke from an uncomfortable nap and struggled to make his way to the Batcomputer. He had a pile of messages: requests from Justice League members for advice, e-mails from Black Canary about something (Tommy refused to open them), and urgent notices from Barbara to get in touch with her. Tommy ignored them all. He sat at the computer, closed his eyes, and rubbed his temples with his fingers. He breathed, letting the silence of the Batcave envelop him. It made his head hurt less.
*HONK *HONK *HONK *HONK *HONK *HONK *HONK *HONK
A large siren blared in the Batcave and a red light began to spin. Tommy felt bile come up to his throat and he groaned, covering his ears while grimacing. Tommy struggled to open his eyes to look at the computer screen.
"Alert! Alert!" The annoying computerized voice said. "Ongoing threat at Gotham Central Station. Threat believed to be Kryptonian."
"Shh," Tommy said. Did everything have to be so Goddamn loud? Tommy rubbed his temples and then lumbered over to his suit. As he began to put the Batsuit on, Tommy heard a familiar door slide open. Tommy turned to see the case of kryptonite ascend from the ground. Pulling on his cowl, Tommy walked over and opened the case.
"Computer," He said, "What do these things do again?"
"Green: weakens Kryptonians.
"Black: splits Kryptonians into good and bad parts.
"Silver: Causes Kryptonians to suffer from delusions.
