"Please, don't touch it," Tommy begged, shielding himself from Batgirl.
"Jesus, that doesn't look good," Batgirl whispered. She stared at Tommy's dick and, for the first time, it wasn't with lust. Tommy's dick was frostbitten from his encounter with Killer Frost days before and had turned a deep purple. He was worried that it might peel or, worse, fall off. He had been privately freaking out before Batgirl had returned from her trip to Bludhaven. He knew there was no way to hide it so he had told her the truth about what happened.
"So Mr. Freeze did this to you?" Batgirl asked, her brow furrowed.
"Yeah, Mr. Freeze," Tommy nodded.
Batgirl thought hard. "Because I've seen what Mr. Freeze does to people and it's bad but not quite THIS bad. And usually doesn't it require direct contact...?"
"No, apparently not," Tommy said. "I was able to capture him but this lingered. Maybe it's special ice or something."
"Special... ice...?" Batgirl asked. She was even more confused.
Tommy quickly moved on. "So anyway, what do I do? Is there a special Bat-doctor I should see? Please don't say Alfred, I don't want to show him my dick."
Batgirl shook her head. "No, don't see a doctor. I know someone better. Let me make a call."
Picking up a phone that Tommy had always been afraid to touch, Batgirl made a call. Tommy could only hear one end of the call.
"Hey, Zee... No, it's Barbara... Yeah, he's fine. He just has a little, well, not so little problem... No, not life-threatening... You are? That's great!... He hasn't really had time to check his messages recently... Yeah, I'll have him meet you after your show. Thanks!"
Batgirl hung up the phone and started scribbling something down on a slip of paper. "You're in luck, she's actually headed to Gotham tonight for a gig. Meet her at the Old Royal Theatre at about 11:30 tonight, her show should be done by then. You'll have to sneak in and make your way to her dressing room."
"Okay," Tommy replied. "...Wait, who am I meeting?"
"Her name is Zatanna. She's a magician," Batgirl told him.
Now it was Tommy's turn to look confused. "You mean she's like a sorcerer or a wizard or something?"
"Well... kinda," Batgirl replied. She typed into the Batcave computer and brought up a webpage. Tommy gaped.
"You'll Never Forget Your Night With The Mesmerizing Zatanna," the header boasted. Looking at the picture underneath, Tommy could see why. Zatanna was a gorgeous raven-haired woman, with beautiful blue eyes that seemed to stare directly into yours. She was smiling widely, her pearly white teeth exposed through bright red lips. Her smile was dazzling, seemingly beckoning you closer. She was wearing a tuxedo vest but nothing underneath; her ample breasts peeked tantalizingly from the top of the vest. A top hat, a tuxedo jacket and hot pants covered the rest of her. Fishnet stockings ran up her legs. She was leaning towards the camera with one finger beckoning. It was hypnotic.
Tommy stared and then winced. He subtly adjusted himself, gingerly moving his injured but still operational dick.
Batgirl noticed the way Tommy was staring at Zatanna and quickly shut the browser. "So listen," She began, "Zatanna is one of Bruce's oldest friends. She knows almost everything about him. You CAN NOT let her know that you aren't Bruce. He didn't tell anyone he was going on this secret mission for a reason and we can't risk letting his secret get out."
Tommy nodded. "Got it."
Batgirl's eyes narrowed. "And you can't do anything with her."
Tommy looked at her innocently. "Whatever do you mean?"
Batgirl stared at him.
"Okay, okay," Tommy gave in, "I won't."
Batgirl eyed him skeptically. "Alright, you better get going if you want to meet her."
***
Tommy sat in Zatanna's dressing room, twiddling his thumbs. There wasn't anything quite so ridiculous as being dressed as Batman when you were just sitting around, he thought. He sat on a highchair, the type that a director would use, with one leg crossed over the other. He was trying as hard as he could to let nothing move his dick. He was sitting next to her make-up desk and the bright lights reflected his ludicrousness in the mirror.
Through the door, he could hear raucous applause. Tommy continued to wait and thought it odd that one of the most powerful magic beings in the universe apparently liked to perform as a stage magician. The room had some of the accoutrements you would expect a stage magician to have: a bunny in the corner, some wands scattered here and there, assorted stacks of cards. You would never guess that a powerful being was at work here.
Tommy continued to wait. The show was over but apparently Zatanna had been delayed. Tommy twiddled his thumbs, just to see if that was a thing people actually did. It wasn't very much fun.
Finally, Tommy could hear a din of voices getting closer. Tommy raced over to a closet and stepped inside. Leaving it open just a hair, he could barely make out a tall figure entering the room. She was leaning over, talking to someone through the door. She kissed them on the cheek. As she did, Tommy checked out her ass. He grabbed his dick in pain.
Zatanna closed the door and turned around. Depositing a large pile of roses on a nearby table, she called out, "Bruce?"
Tommy stepped out of the closet. "Hello," he said neighborly.
"Bruce!" Zatanna cried out. She bounded over to Tommy and gave him a big hug. Her breasts pushed up against him.
"Ah!" He spontaneously cried out. Zatanna jumped back and looked at him with concern.
"Are you hurt? Batgirl mentioned something was wrong and-"
"No, I'm okay," Tommy said. "Just in a little bit of pain."
"Bruce," Zatanna chastised, "What's wrong? And why's your voice sound funny? You can tell me anything, you know that."
Tommy made his way over back to the make-up table and took a seat. He cleared his throat. "I have a small cold, I think. My problem is that I had a little run-in with Mr. Freeze and have a certain condition now that Bat... Barbara thought you could help me with. I didn't want to bother you but..."
Zatanna laughed, throwing her head up into the air. "Oh Bruce," She said, "You know you're never a bother. Show me your injury and let me see what I can do."
As she said that, Zatanna held her hands behind her an held her head high. She shouted, "Hatpot dna taoc yawa!" and both her jacket and hat flew off her head, landing on the coat rack near the door. Tommy noticed that her breasts weren't just bursting out of the top of her vest but also the sides. He cleared his throat again, covering up his groan.
Tommy began to show Zatanna his injury but faltered. He remembered what Barbara had said. "Are you sure you need to see it? I mean, it's in kind of a sensitive area. I don't want to shock you."
Zatanna thought for a moment and then her eyes went wide. "You mean... oh. Oh!" Then she laughed again. Somehow she was sexier when she laughed, Tommy thought. "Bruce, I don't think there's any part of you that I haven't seen before."
Tommy was surprised at this; apparently the original Batman wasn't a monk like everyone thought. Tommy got off the chair, turned himself to the side, and shimmied off the bottoms of his suit down to his knees. Then he slowly turned and faced Zatanna.
"Yikes," She said, her hand shooting up to her mouth. She stared at it. "It looks like it's... frostbitten? But it's also swollen, much larger than normal. Does that happen during frostbite?"
Tommy tried not to smile. "Uh yeah, I think I heard that somewhere."
Zatanna continued to stare. She seemed to be lost in thought. "Oh right, we need to fix it," She muttered to herself, suddenly snapping herself out of her daze. She opened up an old steamer trunk and pulled out of it a thick leather-bound book. It looked incredibly ancient. Opening it, Zatanna began to search for a spell.
"So, let's see here... warming spell won't heal the injury... general healing spell? No, we need to be careful with that area..." She flipped pages, scanning quickly.
Tommy stood uncomfortably. Apparently there WAS one more activity more ridiculous than sitting in a brightly-lit room while dressed as Batman and it was standing in a brightly-lit room while dressed as Batman with your dick out.
"You know what," Zatanna said, looking up and then down at Tommy's dick. She spoke to it, not him. "Maybe we can look through my father's old spells. He might have some gender-specific spells for a... situation like this." Zatanna put her book away and grabbed an older, even thicker book. She flipped to the back.
"A-ha!" She exclaimed. "Here we go: 'This spell will make your penis better than new and take a real load off your mind!' Sounds like just what we need."
Tommy breathed a sigh of relief. Zatanna continued.