"According to your reports," The commander didn't look up from her computer screen, "It looks like you defended 9S while he hacked without incident. Excellent work, 2B."
"Yes, Commander," 2B frowned. "But defended is a strong word for it, we didn't see a single enemy, let alone fight one."
"Well, they were probably too scared of you to engage," The commander shrugged.
"Commander, 9S-" 2B started, then 9S elbowed her to interrupt.
"What about him?" The commander asked like 9S wasn't there.
"He did an above-expectation job," 2B chose her words carefully, making sure not to lead the commander in any way.
"He did what he was expected to, yes. I don't agree that he did more." The commander responded tersely. "The expectations for a scanner unit are different from those for a battle unit. The risk is lower for him, the technical performance more forward. If I'm limited with my praise and forward with my criticism of 9S, it's because most missions assume his success and die on his mistakes. If his name comes up in the recounting of what happened, it is almost always because of his failure."
"Yes, Commander," 9S smiled glibly. "Very well put."
"Regardless, both of you, well done." The commander saluted. "For the glory of mankind."
"For the glory of mankind." They both responded flatly.
***
"I told you."
9S sat back and kicked his feet, sitting in 2B's chair as she paced around her stark black and white room. She was tracing a slow, methodical pattern from bookshelf to wall.
"Technically, the commander did-"
"She didn't," 9S leaned back in his chair. "She praised 'both of us', not me. We agreed beforehand that wouldn't count."
"But..." 2B balled her fists. "I did nothing that mission! I didn't even stand guard, not really. You hacked into the terminal while I sat in the grass nearly a kilometer away and caught butterflies on my fingers!"
"Yeah, I was there," 9S grinned smugly.
"But she still praised me and not you!" 2B sat down on her bed, frowning.
"Commander doesn't like me," 9S kept grinning. "I'd say she doesn't like any scanner unit, but I've actually heard her praise one of the other ones. Granted, it was for fixing her personal terminal..."
"I should never have taken that bet with you," 2B turned her frown to him. "You cheated."
"Cheated?" 9S's grin disappeared. "You're the one who nearly cheated. You were about to go fishing for her to compliment me before I stopped you."
"Yes, but..." 2B's frown deepened.
"You made a bad bet," 9S went back to smirking. "It happens. I could have warned you that I only take bets I know I'll win."
"How exactly do you only pick winning bets?" 2B glanced at him.
"Think of it like this," 9S slid a little lower in the chair. "You bet me fifty gold that the sun will rise tomorrow morning."
"Why would I ever take that bet?"
"Because we both know that, realistically, the sun will rise. So fifty gold for fifty gold isn't fair. Instead of me putting up fifty gold, I put up something like... fifty million." 9S tilted his head toward her. "You'd be pretty dumb not to take that, right?"
"I... guess?" 2B shrugged. "Fifty gold is not that much, and there is always a chance for some kind of eclipse, or other strange occurrence."
"See, there's the trick," 9S made a gesture like he was rubbing a pair of coins together. "You're dumb not to take the bet because of how much you potentially miss out on. Meanwhile, I get a free fifty gold."
"Until the day the sun doesn't rise," 2B smirked. "Or until the day I steal my money back."
"Until," 9S said in an artificially whimsical voice, "But I knew that the commander praising me and not you was about as likely as the sun not rising, so I offered the bet."
"You bet stupidly." 2B stood back up, "Wouldn't it be better to bet a logical amount on a controlled outcome."
"You say I bet stupidly," 9S stood up with her and stole her spot on the bed. "Good luck finding somebody who will accept a logical amount for a controlled outcome. That's a recipe for getting ripped off."
"As opposed to you, who thinks you are the one doing the ripping off," 2B countered. She turned to 9S and scowled when she saw him on her bed, but she sat in her chair without commenting on it.
"If I only think I'm the one doing the ripping off, how come I just ripped you off?" He asked smugly.
"Because I didn't know the actual context of the bet," 2B admitted sheepishly. "I misjudged the commander."
"Sounds like the outcome wasn't as controlled as you thought."
"No," She rose, clearly remembering that her chair wasn't good for sitting in and realizing why he'd gotten up. "Though I didn't bet much."
"Hey, we agreed you have to do whatever I want," 9S propped himself up on his elbows. "That's not nothing."
"If you're going to command me to break the rules or throw myself out of the airlock, I will simply refuse to obey," 2B frowned. "Otherwise, I doubt anything in your perverted little mind will really phase me."
"Funny you say perverted," 9S grinned ear to ear. "Because I've been watching some human media recently."
"Oh... shit..." 2B grimaced. "I had worried this would be your request."
"Now, I don't want you to go thinking I've been fantasizing about this or anything-" 9S started, then stared at her. "What exactly are you doing?"
2B looked up. She had been unfastening her skirt and pulling down her stockings. Her headband had been slipped from her porcelain-white hair. Her blindfold was off and her icy blue eyes were suddenly frightening in how intense and how cold they were. He took his blindfold off too, but if his navy eyes were anywhere near as intimidating, she didn't show it.
"I was under the impression your request was going to be... carnal..." She responded uncertainly.
"I mean... it kinda is..." 9S looked away. "But not like... that kind of carnal..."
"You do realize it is within your capability to request copulation," 2B explained casually. "And not outside of reason. Scanner units and battle units are compatible. It has happened before."
"Right, but... let me put it like this," 9S grinned in a slightly skeevy way. "For one thing, that sounds like a lot of effort."
"A lot of..." 2B rolled the words on her tongue, seeming to decide they were sour by the way her face went cold and hard. "You ass."
"Aaaand," 9S really snuggled into the sheets as he drew out his words. "Since you're the one getting all the attention from the commander, I figured it should be something where I could really just lay back, relax, let you do all of the work."
"I see," 2B's face seemed to get even colder. 9S was worried he was pushing his luck. "What did you have in mind?"
"First of all, could you call me something like 'master' while we're doing this?" He pushed it further.
"Either that is your request, or the act you want me to perform is your request," 2B's lips curled into a slight sneer. "I'm not going to do both."
"Fine, fine." He shrugged. "So there was this one human video I saw... Where the guy was laying down, and the girl was standing over him..."
"On the bed?" 2B asked annoyedly.
"On the floor actually, but I think the bed will work too." 9S glanced at her casually. "You'll probably want to take off your heels, though."
"I was going to, anyway," 2B answered as she sat back down in the chair and unzipped the long zippers that held up her stocking heels. "I'm not standing on my bed in them."
"Well, I don't want you standing on anything else in them either," 9S chuckled.
She looked at him in bewilderment before fully removing both. Her legs were long and toned with wiry muscle, round in the thighs but tight in the ankles and calves. She was even paler where her stockings covered, though this was mechanical and not a real tan, and palest of all were her feet. Long and thin, hairless and delicately feminine. Her thighs were thick enough that her stockings normally dug into their smooth, pearly flesh. Now that they were off, a red mark remained in the pattern of the frilly fabric. Like a signature.
"I'm assuming I should be naked," 2B gave him a slightly bemused look, "Should I remove the rest of my clothing before we start, or is there a specific way you want it?"