Hour Glass

I am just leaving the Hour Glass signing in NYC after an amazing day of Depeche Mode heaven. My pulse is still thundering in my ears and my head is still swimming around with the euphoria of having just touched Dave's hands.

As he reached for the C.D. he took both of my tiny hands into his long and sensual grip and as I looked into his eyes, I knew that there was so much more behind them that was meant just for me.

For those 4 or 5 seconds time stood still. He took my breath away as though he was inhaling my sensuality, drinking deep of the chemistry that was unmistakably flowing between us.

Oh my, he is speaking but for a moment I just see his lips moving but I'm unable to hear a sound and then he smiles and I am brought back to the fact that we are facing each other in a room with so many other people, but we are the only ones there.

Stammering, "I apologize for my inability to speak" and he laughs that smoldering, sultry laugh that tells me that I am going to be a very lucky woman.

Dave asks "What is your name, baby?"

I managed to slip out – "Ammy" - all the while breathing shallow breaths as to not just drop on the floor before him.

I feel so many things all rushing in at once and I realize that I want to be a considerate fan to the rest of the folks standing behind me and tell him "I am so much looking forward to a concert tour of Hour Glass".

He completes what he has written and I say

"thank you for your time" and reluctantly say "Ta-ta", with one last caress of my hand, starring intently into each others eyes he places the CD there, a glowing smile, the connection is passed between us. A glimmering but unseen halo surrounds us. People of pure heart can recognize each other.

My feet are nailed to the floor and I have to shake myself to clear my head in order to move away from the table. The girls that were in front of me on line are waiting for me to join them.

Shocked and wildly jealous of the extraordinary sight that they had just witnessed. They are hugging me and screaming as we jump up and down with joy! We link arms and they drag me out into the bustling streets of New York.

I am still having trouble breathing and I feel like I just had the most magnificent dream. The girls are asking me to see my CD but I put it in my inside jacket pocket to have it as close to my heart as I can.

They keep pestering but I wanted to read it when I was on my own as to savor the words that my beloved Dave Gahan had written just for me. We walk the blocks that it takes to get to Carmines on West 44th Street. I can not wait to wrap my lips around an Appletini cocktail. The walk went unnoticed as we were all just floating inches above the pavement.

We follow the waiter to our table take our seats and I take this opportunity to run to the ladies room. Here is my chance. I make my way up the stair case and push open the door. It is still early so the restaurant is only mildly busy. I have the room to myself. I slide the CD out from the folds of my black trench style rain jacket. In most perfect penmanship it reads:

Dearest Ammy,

I saw something in your eyes and I want it for myself.....

917-555-5555 "It's no good"

- Dave Gahan

I read it over and over. Who would ever believe me? But there is no one on earth that I am going to share this with anyway!

All of the emotions that I have been experiencing all day come flooding into a hazy sort of perspective. Do I call him? Clearly yes! My next thoughts are of the immorality of it all. After all we are both married to people who love us very dearly. Although any other time this would have been enough to keep my hormones in check, not this time.

I take out my cell and start to dial the number, carefully adding each digit into display. Just push send......... either way there will be regrets? I contemplate the weight of the shackles that I will be wearing from this moment on and decide that I will never have another opportunity to fulfill a dream such as this.

I push send. It connects, I hear ring 1 and 2 and quickly hit end. It is still early and he is in the middle of the signing. I don't want to leave an awkward voice message.

I take a quick check of my appearance and blot the misting I have in my eyes... calm exterior – like a duck floating on the lake – their feet underneath the water, paddling one hundred miles an hour! I mustn't let on about my incredible good fortune.

I make my way back to the table. As I take my seat, my phone starts to vibrate. With shaking hands I take it out of my pocket. The number I had just dialed is ringing me back.

I manage a "Hello."

The voice on the other end speaks to me and says, "I believe that I just missed your call?"

Breathless, I say "yes you did. I didn't want to bother you because I thought that you are probably still at the signing".

He speaks again "Actually, I've just finished and I am in my car. Are you still in the vicinity, Ammy?"

My head starts reeling all over again, as the girls are sort of staring at me and back and forth between each other with this confused look.

I explain that "I am at Carmine's Italian Restaurant on 44th between 7th & 8th."

Dave sort of whispers, with sultrily nuances, "I'll swing round with the car, that is if you'd like to join me?"

How does one respond to the culmination of all those lonely nights dreaming of just this occasion and not blow ones cool?

One word is all I can muster "yes...."