One fine evening, where the moon was full, there lived three lonely hobbits. First there was Sam the Wise. He was married to a bartender and enjoyed wearing black satin g-strings and threw each one away after being used once. Then there was Pippin the Scavenger Man. He was pretty thrifty and bright. So often he ravaged through random trash barrels. On a certain occasion he came upon the mother load of all trash, a pile of steaming-one-time-used black satin thongs. He took them and still wears them to this day. Finally there was Merry. He was rather... well naive and innocent. On top of that free spirited, pipe smoking, laddie who needed to live a little, he was also a virgin.
Even though they had each other, they all still missed Frodo. They missed the long walks they had with him, they missed the way he caressed each one of their bodies after those wonderful long walk, and well... all the stuff that led up to the morning after.
But baen to the three laddies, there was a festival that night and of course there was a heavy supply of ale and pipe weed. Let’s juts say they might of had a little bite of too much fun. All of them were staying in the Prancing Pony that night and on that particular night, those hobbit rooms got a little too cozy.
It all started with Merry the virgin, asking Sam and Pippin exactly how all the different positions worked.
Sam and Pippin shared a secret smile. Merry would finally grow up on this starry night. He would become the hobbit he was meant to be.
“Merry have you ever kissed before?” Pippin gently asked his best friend.
“Just my mum.” Merry answered, blushing.
“Well, these lips have been around Hobbiton,” Sam said, pointing to his mouth. “I’ll show you what a hobbit tongue can do”, he whispered seductively into Merry’s sensitive ear, causing him to slightly shudder.
He grabbed his good friends hand and lead him over to the nearest wall, pressed him firmly against the wall, and gave Merry a kiss he’d never forget. He had never felt the flutter of butterflies inside his belt like that before.
After the amazing kiss, Sam stepped back, opened his eyes, and walked towards the bed while gesturing for Merry to follow him. While this was happening, Pippin went over by the window, stared at the clear sparkling sky, while smoking his pipe. He made small erotic figures as he exhaled his smoke. Sam and Merry were beginning to really get busy.
They did not pretend to be quiet about it either, you could hear them from as far away as Rivendell. Merry was so amazed at what he had been missing. Pippin watched until he could not contain his ‘special urges’, and jumped right on into the action. I suppose it could of sounded as if they were having sex, but they weren't, yet. All of a sudden Pippin stripped off his clothes all the way down to his g-string. He felt somewhat embarrassed, when he realized they had not planned on diving into having sex right away. But he was forgiven when they saw his ‘ready and enlarged package’.
“Is that my g-string you had on Pippin?”, asked Sam.
