Golden Girls Gangbang

"Golden Girls Gangbang"

by J.D. Savanyu

Another sizzling hot afternoon in suburban Miami. Four sexy gilfs were hanging out in their house on Flamingo Drive, retired and bored out of their minds. Sitting around bitching and moaning, pining for their slutty "glory days." Rose Nylund was the ditzy one, Blanche Devereaux was an in-your-face southern belle, Sophia Petrillo was a crazy Italian paesano, and Dorothy Zbornak was the sensible one (sort of.) They were all pushing seventy, but they still acted about thirty.

"Damn, it's hotter than the devil's asshole today," Blanche whined while waving a Japanese hand fan with geishas painted on it. "I feel like Maggie the Cat on a Hot Tin Roof."

"Maggie was real frisky, way down in Ole Miss," Rose giggled.

"I used to be 'frisky,' but I haven't gotten any dick since I took my talents to South Beach," Blanche continued. "Most younger guys don't want an old bag like me, and most of the older guys can't get it up anymore."

"It's been two months since I took a joyride on a hot rod," Dorothy added. "I'm so horny, I almost raped the mailman today,"

"Talk about 'going postal,'" Rose remarked.

"You ladies have never gone without cock as long as I have," Sophia interjected. "Back in Sicily, women were expected to remain pure until marriage, so unmarried sluts like me had to sneak around. I lost my virginity on my eighteenth birthday to a bartender at the village tavern. He fucked my brains out in a hayloft, and it was the best two minutes of my life. But a big piece of hay got stuck in my uterus, and I got a terrible infection. I couldn't have sex again for a whole year, and by that time the Americans had invaded Italy, and that bartender was banging a slutty dancer with the U.S.O. tour. She gave him syphilis, and he wound up dead in a gutter. I screwed plenty of Yankee soldiers, but I never got V.D. I'm a damn lucky broad."

"Another fascinating story, honey," Dorothy replied sarcastically.

"I'm not one of the lucky ones, I guess," Blanche grumbled. "I should probably throw in the towel, and settle for those limp-dick shuffleboarders down at the senior center."

"You come on too strong with that spicy southern belle attitude," Rose replied. "Most men prefer sweet ladies like me."

"How about a knuckle sandwich, sweetie?" Blanche growled.

Just then, a loud banging sound rang out on Flamingo Drive, followed by the loud screeching sound of tires.

"What the hell was

that

?" Sophia shrieked. "It sounded like an F6 Hellcat, dropping a bomb on Palermo."

"Maybe it's one of those drug cartel gangbangers," Rose guessed. She went to a living room window and peered around a curtain. "I'll be damned. It's the Florida Panthers!"

"The Florida

who

?" Blanche gaped.

"The new Miami hockey team, in the NHL."

"Miami has a

hockey

team now?" Sophia chortled. "What next, eskimos on jet skis?"

"Those hockey guys are real tough customers," Rose continued. "They won their first preseason game last night, but now their team bus has a flat tire."

"Hot damn. I never pass up a chance to flirt with beefcakes," Blanche beamed.

"Good idea. Let's break the ice with those Canadian hunks, and maybe they'll break

us

," Rose giggled.

"They're about a hundred miles out of our league, but it's worth a shot," Dorothy sighed. They all went out to the sidewalk in the blazing heat, looking at a big bus with a pouncing cartoon panther on the side, flanked by a hockey stick and a palm tree. The bus driver stepped out to look at the flat tire, followed by five ripped jocks in sharp gray suits.

"Hey fellas, you're in quite a jam here," Blanche uttered flirtatiously. "Your tire is flat, but your muscles sure ain't!"

"Thanks, ma'am," replied a tall Panther.

"Lean and mean, just the way I like 'em. I'm Blanche. What's your name, honey?"

"I'm Stu. This is Doug, that's Len, that's Jesse, and that's Brian. We're the first scoring line for the Panthers."

"Scoring line? I like the sound of

that,

" Rose replied flirtatiously. "I bet you score a lot of goals, on

and

off the ice."

"Uh . . . yeah, I guess." Jesse murmured. "I scored a hat trick last night."

"A hat

what

?" Sophia replied.

"A hat trick. Three goals in one game."

"Good for you, Mister MVP!" Blanche beamed. "Have you scored any 'hat tricks' in bed?"

"As a matter of fact, I

have

," Jesse snickered. "Sixteen three-ways, and five four-ways. Not counting the ones I was too drunk to remember."

"Hoo boy, you're just my type," Sophia uttered, clearly aroused. "I used to bang a lot of jocks back in Sicily, when I was a college cheerleader. They were mostly soccer players, of course. Nobody ever heard of hockey on that hot Mediterranean island. It rarely went below freezing in the winter, and there was only one snowstorm the whole time I lived there. It happened when I was on a road trip with the soccer team, staying at a hotel in Catania. We had an epic cabin fever orgy, lasting three straight hours. The best sex I ever had, bar none.

Una scopota meravigliosa, oh mio dio

!"

"Wow," Doug chortled. "Did you ever meet Don Corleone?"

"Uh . . . "

"Say, boys," Dorothy interjected, "would any of you like to go out on a date with us golden bachelorettes?"

"Hell, why not?" Len snickered. "I have a thing for older women, after being raised by my grandmother."

"A group date with hot grannies will be a nice change of pace from our usual brainless bikini models," Stu added.

"Come on out to our pool party tonight, at my house in Sunset," Brian offered. "227 Lauderdale Road. Bring your bathing suits along, and we'll have some wet and wild fun."

"Sounds refreshing, honey," Sophia uttered seductively. "We'll beat the heat, and get hotter than Anita Eckberg in

La Dolce Vita

."

"La Dolce

what

?"

"Never mind."

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

The golden girls arrived at Brian's mansion in posh suburban Sunset, glowing in a glorious Florida sunset. The superstar's house was full of vintage NHL memorabilia. Lots of sticks and pucks from the Original Six. The girls didn't give a shit about hockey (or any sport besides sex,) so they went right out to his backyard, with a big pool, a big hot tub, and a Hawaiian luau-themed liquor bar. Fifteen hard-skating hunks lounged in swim trunks and Speedos, sipping cocktails and headbanging to "Symphony of Destruction" by Megadeth.

"Howdy, boys. The party bitches are in da

house

!" Blanche announced comically. The four senior citizens stripped down to stylish bikinis, showing off their saggy but still sexy bodies.

"Not bad, ladies. Not bad at all," Stu murmured.

"You've aged like fine wine," Len added.

"You're a bunch of wild ice bangers, and we're a bunch of bad grannies," Dorothy proclaimed, bopping her silver head to the thrash metal anthem.

"I'm feeling like a naughty

piccola sgualdrina

," Sophia beamed, wiggling her cellulite-laden hips. "Let's go skinny dipping in this unfrozen pond!"

"Hell yeah!" Keith cheered.

"I love going

au natural

," Joe agreed.

"Are you fucking serious, Sophia?" Dorothy groaned.

"Of course I am, you tight-laced Yankee prude."

Sophia shamelessly removed her yellow polka-dot bikini, revealing her full frontal gilf glory. The scoring and checking lines cheered loudly.

"Why the fuck not?" Dorothy sighed. "This is probably our last chance to go hog wild in a cee-ment pond."

They all stripped nude and entered the pool, feeling rejuvenated in the cool water, watching those hockey guys pull down their Speedos. They all got hard with "team spirit."

"Fuck yeah, boys!" Blanche cheered. "Those sticks are long enough to score a hat trick. Like Big Daddy on the sugar plantation."

"I'd like to hang my fedora on

that

rack," Dorothy murmured, pointing at Peter's eight-inch pecker. The players entered the pool awkwardly. Blanche grabbed the edge of the pool and pulled her body half out of the water, showing off her ass.

"What do you think of my

derriere

, you charming drinks of water?"

"That's the finest

derriere

I ever did see, Miss Blanche," Jesse replied, imitating her sultry Georgia accent with his Montreal

quebecois

accent. The other golden girls pulled themselves half out of the water, shaking their rumps eagerly. "What do you think of

our

asses?" Rose beamed.

"I'd love to eat

poutine

off that ass, bitch," Jeff grunted.

"I wanna smack those saggy cheeks, granny," Len added.

"Go ahead, punks. Make our day!" Sophia growled like Dirty Harry. The first scoring line swam forward and lightly slapped their asses, making them yelp in delight.

"That's right, boys," Blanche groaned. "Two minutes of spanking in the penalty box."

"Harder!" Sophia cried. "Spank me like my crazy

papà ubriaco

!"

"I'm your fucking daddy, you old skank!" Len grunted, spanking her loudly on both cheeks. "I'll make you an offer you can't refuse."

The second scoring line swam in, tagged out their teammates, and went to work on eight saggy glutes.

"Oooh yeah, that sting's going right to my clit," Dorothy moaned.

"I haven't been spanked this good since Salvadore caught me cheating on him with his brother!" Sophia cackled. The checking line swooped in and spanked them even more, driving the golden girls gaga.

"God damn, I'm so fucking horny," Blance groaned. "I need a big hockey stick up my twat!"

"Sure thing, babe," Doug laughed. They all swam across the pool, and the girls assumed the doggy style pose in a row on the steps, wiggling their asses eagerly. Doug grabbed an official NHL hockey stick and shoved the narrow butt end up Blanche's twat.

"Oh god, yes! That hockey rod feels so good in my bod!" Blanche moaned loudly, squeezing her tits and tilting her head toward the Miami sunset.

"Come on boys, let's score a sombrero on those naughty grannies!" Brian beamed. The rest of the checking line grabbed some sticks and used them to score a vaginal hat trick (plus one.)

"Oh fuck, oh fuck! This is so fucking crazy!" Dorothy growled ecstatically, working her wet clit with her fingers.

"I can't wait to brag about this to the geezers at the senior center," Rose giggled while getting slap-shotted like hell.

"Shaft us harder, ya fuckin' Cannucks!" Blanche ordered. The Panthers gladly obeyed her order, shafting them like Mario Lemiuex. The harsh gravelly sound of moaning old ladies mixed with the white noise of sloshing chlorinated water.

"Oh fuck, I'm gonna squirt all over this fucking pool!" Sophia groaned. "

Oh mio fottuto dio siii, merda merda MEEEEERDAAAAA!"

The other three girls reached equally theatrical orgasms, pounding their fists on the concrete deck and thrashing their legs in the pool water.

"Holy shit, holy

shiiiiiit

," Rose purred with her eyes rolling back in her head.

"I need

more

!" Blanche growled. "I wanna get scored by the top line!"

"Me too."

"Me three."

"Me four!"

"We're going missionary on these sinful silver sluts," Pete growled. They sat down on the first watery step, and the power shooting line spread their legs wider. Sliding their big jock cocks up four wrinkly pinkholes.

"Fuck yeah!" Stu growled while pussy-pounding Dorothy. "Bottom shelf, where mama don't hide the cookies."

"Fucking

biiiiitch

!" Doug growled at Rose. "Getting one last gangbang before that old pussy falls right out."

"I love your big fucking stick!" Blanche moaned at Len. "I wish there was an NHL team back in Hot-lanta."

"I wish there was one in New Orleans," Jeff mused from the sidelines.

"The Big Easy needs some hockey," Len replied breathlessly, pumping his pelvis like Elvis.               "Thank god Wayne Huizenga was crazy enough to bring a team to Miami," Jeff snickered.

"That Blockbuster Video money is really busting pucks," Randy remarked.

"I love Blockbuster. Especially the porn section," Dorothy moaned, masturbating vigorously.

"Fuck me

harder

!" Sophia roared to Jesse. He picked up the pace, smacking his muscular hips loudly against her cellulite-laden thighs. "Just like that, you well-hung stud! Treat me like Mussolini on a Roman tavern wench."

Stu splashed water all over Dorothy's tits and twat. He kept pounding away while spanking her ass even more. "God damn, I love mature women. They know exactly what they want, and they fucking

get

it."

"Change up, boys!" Keith announced. "Give the deuce line some ice time."

They reluctantly pulled out, and the second line swooped in, banging those senior sluts like twenty-something sex kittens. Joe slobbered Rose's floppy d-cups and slammed his sausage up her asshole.

"God damn, you dirty Canadian Mountie!" she growled. "Screw me harder than all those Cuban

muchachas

down on the

playa

."

"

Diablos si, maldita abuela loca

!" Joe remarked in B-minus high school spanish. He smacked her boobies nice and hard while bashing her booty. Meanwhile, Keith wrapped Blanche's legs around his shoulders, then he stood up and pile-drove his dick into her tight vagina, making waves in the pool. Ten guys cheered him on from the sidelines, pumping their ripped arms.

"Keith, Keith, Keith, Keith, Keith, Keith, Keith, Keith, Keith!"

Jeff switched to anal on Dorothy, and Dallas started titty-fucking Sophia.

"Good boy! Keep pumping my big heaving bosoms. This is better than all those stupid-ass Harlequin romance novels I've been reading."

"I'm a real fucking stud, you crazy Eye-tie!" he barked out, spanking her flabby old ass.

The other Florida Panthers grew impatient with taking turns. Mike stepped out of the pool and raised his arms like a referee calling a penalty on the ice.

"Zamboni time, boys! Everyone off the rink, and into the jacuzzi."

"Fuck yeah, ref!" Tom beamed. "A little hydrotherapy for these seasoned veterans."

They hustled across the concrete deck and eased into a big lukewarm hot tub, in the shade of three palm trees. Blanche turned on the jets and sucked Len's dick, pumping her silver head rapidly in and out of the water, making him groan. Joe penetrated her from behind, fucking her hard in the bubbling water while spanking her with both hands.

"Just like that, Lenny-boy! Fuck it like you bought it. Treat me like a French Quarter hooker on Mardi Gras!"

It quickly escalated into a full-on balls-to-the-wall whirlpool gangbang. Fifteen jocks doinking four hot gilfs in every position and every hole. Stu and Dallas hoisted Rose's body horizontally and tilted her sideways, scissoring her slit and fucking her face. Jesse and Tom double-penetrated Dorothy while she deep-throated Doug. Sophia grabbed two dicks and sucked another, while taking two more underwater. An amazing blur of wet writhing bodies, moaning and groaning in a loud splashing cacophony.

"This is vintage hockey fucking, boys!" Brian cheered in the middle of the fray. "Like those old-school brawls at the Montreal Forum."

Blanche groaned loudly against Randy's nine-inch rod while getting her holes hammered by Joe and Jeff. She twisted her head up and down the thick shaft and jacked her clit, soon reaching a powerful orgasm. Dorothy drooled and babbled incoherently against the edge of the tub, taking two cocks in the pink and another up the stink. Stu worked his way around and plugged her mouth with man-meat. They pulled out a minute later and smacked her up, pulling her gray hair like naughty schoolboys.

"Oh god, I love kinky men like you!" Dorothy wailed. "Two minutes for roughing, you fucking enforcer!"

The other Panthers spanked the golden girls even more, and fucked 'em till they broke. Twenty collective climaxes in twenty minutes; squirting like hell in that swirling tub. A sweaty writhing mass of humanity, like piranhas in the amazon river.

"It's a tie game, so let's settle this with a shootout," Keith announced.

"All over their hot gilf faces!" Jesse added eagerly.

"Come on, you old fogies. Get down on the deck," Brian grunted. The golden girls exited the whirlpool and dropped to their knees near the luau bar. A tight round bukkake formation for the Florida Panthers. The girls tilted their heads back to get a hot creamy treat, with their wet hair sticking together in a solid gray mass.

"Holy shit. I can't believe I'm gonna bust a load on these Geritol sluts," Len chortled.

"They're forty years older than that redhead cheerleader I body-checked last night," Peter added wryly.

"

Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhh

!"

"EeeeeeeYAA-HA-HOOOOOOO!"

"Uhhhhh

wuuuuuh!

Fucking

shiiiiiiiit

!"

"God damn, god damn, god fucking DAAAAAAAAAMMMN!"

Big gobs of goo gushed all over, splattering those silver foxes from head to pussy. Four more players hustled into the offensive zone and pumped their sticks for wicked one-timers.

"Call me the next Gretzky, you slutty granny," Keith growled.

"You're

better

than Gretzky, baby," Dorothy murmured. "Grease me up like the Edmonton Oilers!"

"He shoots, he

scoooooooooores

!"

Four more wads plastered their pretty faces, making them moan loudly. The hockey bukkake lasted nearly five minutes, with everyone going back for sloppy seconds. By the time it was over, the golden girls looked like Lucille Ball after a milk factory mishap. More spunk than a Jerry Lewis telethon.

"Fuck yeah, you nasty grannies!" Dallas cheered.

"Now

that's

what I call a 'power play,'" Joe remarked.

"Hell of a game, ladies," Jesse beamed. "Let's do this again sometime."

"Anytime you want, boys," Blanche uttered seductively.

"I'll give you some free tickets to a Panthers game, so you can watch us score some

real

goals," Stu said.

"Sounds awesome, honey," Sophia beamed, licking splooge off her fingers. "Hockey is way fucking better than soccer."