Milo had known Absol for YEARS and had now been on the road with her for nearly two, so why was he starting to get so tense around her? They'd both turned 19 a while ago, was that it?
No, why would that change anything?
They'd found some lodging just outside the main part of town, a small place renting single room cabins. Milo slipped in the key, and the lock clicked. He pushed the door open, relieved to be out of the rain, with Absol jumping in behind him.
"God, I'm filthy."
Absol looked herself up and down, her white fur stained with streaks of mud.
"Well that graveler had been in a pretty bad mood."
"Yeah, but why did it have to be raining? Just gets mud everywhere."
By the time Milo'd popped off his muddy shoes, Absol was still trying to wipe her muddy paws off on the door mat, a disgusted look on her face.
"You... want a bath for this one?"
It felt intrusive to even just ask, regardless of how many times they'd been through this exact scenario.
And yet it feels weird now.
She hesitated a moment.
"Y-Yes please. I JUST- I don't want to spend hours trying to get this out of my fur myself."
It was getting dark out, the day having been spent mostly trying to find and deal with a grumpy graveler that had been taking rocks from the walls of people's houses. The mountainside town had been a nice, quiet place. Certainly quite the contrast from the cities Milo had been spending so much time in as of late. It should feel nice to have a break between their big tournaments, get some rest before training up again.
Then why does it feel like something is stuck in the air?
Milo slipped into more comfortable clothes, ditching his dirty casual wear for sweat pants and a loose tee. He met up with Absol in the 'bathroom', nothing more than a small, tiled corner of the lodge with thin fiberglass walls. But it had a toilet, a tub, a sink, and a shower so it wasn't too bad.
Absol had the water going, but the tub wasn't filling. She was pawing at something on the floor of the tub. Walking in on her felt... wrong. Like he'd just walked in on his sister, or someone showering.
"There you are! I-"
She noticed something, probably the way he was nervously looking around, or maybe she just fully realized the scenario. Regardless, the feeling spread to her too and she looked away, suddenly embarrassed. Her gaze locked to the floor of the tub.
"I can't work the shower."
Milo walked up and peaked over the edge of the tub. She'd managed to get her forepaws mostly clean with the bar of soap she'd been struggling to grab when he came in. The soft bar had a few gauges where she had gripped it with her dull claws. Her lower half was wet, but on account of that she'd only managed to get the spigot on and not the shower head, it'd be difficult and uncomfortable to soak her whole body. Looking above the spigot made it obvious why she hadn't been able to switch on the shower herself. It was a stiff metal lever, slightly depressed into the wall of the shower. Impossible to get a grip on without proper fingers. She waited, sitting in the tub like a toddler. Milo could practically feel the heat of her shame as he reached over her. Milo wanted to reassure her, but no words came to him.
He swapped the handle over to 'shower' and the detachable shower head sputtered to life. Warm water rained down, comforting Absol for a moment. Milo started to take off his shirt, not wanting to get it wet. Getting the garment off, he tossed it away and turned back to Absol, who jerked her eyes off him. Milo pretended not to have noticed. He awkwardly reached behind Absol to the other side of the tub, grabbing the shampoo from a shallow ledge. Absol locked up while he did, holding her breath. He came back around, and popped open the shampoo bottle. Water ran down his arm in small trickles, reminding him he'd have to put even more of his body in the tub with Absol to fully get her clean. Tilting the bottle and emptying a glob onto his hands, he looked back to Absol.
"I'm gonna start now."
He reached forward, running his hand along Absol's side, trying to get the shampoo under her fur. There was nothing but the sound of running water and the rain above. Absol tensed up, stiffly looking forward as Milo worked. He didn't dare press too hard, or go any lower. So he just kept awkwardly rubbing her with the soap at arm's length, barely making any progress. It all felt wrong. Suddenly, Absol collapsed onto the floor of the tub with a troubled whimper. Milo knew why. He let his hand rest on the edge of the tub, stray drops of water slowly washing off the suds.
"What are we doing?"
She lay defeated at the bottom of the tub, resting her head against the fiberglass. Water slowly rolled down her fur.
"I... I don't know." Milo answered.
He dropped the shamoo on the floor, letting it fall from his hand.
"We've known each other- LIVED with each other almost our whole lives, and it turns into
this
?"
Absol gestured forward with a paw, to the shower handles. Milo frowned. She was right, neither of them wanted
this
.
"It's... everything's so awkward now. And we've been together our whole lives, I don't... I don't want to do something wrong."
Milo stared at the floor.
"It's like I only just realized how uncomfortable everything is we've been doing for years."
The silence of running water returned. Milo didn't know what to do now. He felt like he was waiting for the world to stop.
"What if it doesn't have to be?"
Absol's voice caught him off guard. It was nearly the last thing he'd expected to hear, but it put something in him. Something like a fluttering in his chest. Like maybe she was right. He looked back to her. She had her head buried between her front legs, something she'd done when she'd been scared as a pup.
"Like, try to accept it? Or..."
Milo's heart was racing, and his palms felt cold. Every fiber of his being telling him not to, but he forced the words anyway.
"Lean into it?"
Regret filled him as the words left his mouth. But they were gone, and it was now up to Absol to decide what to do with them.
Was this how she felt too, after saying what she did?
"Y-yes."
"To... to which?"
"Both."
Milo hadn't realized he'd been holding his breath.