[
Setting the scene:
the events of this chapter take place before the arrival of Gandalf, Aragorn, and Gimli.]
23 February 3019 (Third Age), Edoras
It was the ache in her hand that she felt first. Dangling over the edge of the bed, unsupported through hours of motionless sleep, its tendons and muscles were paralyzed by stiffness, her fingers still curled around a long-absent shaft. Unbending them was a long, slow process accompanied by tooth-grinding pain.
Her other hand couldn't move at all, for it remained fastened to a bedpost. Her lips were dry and sore. Her legs splayed wide, still strapped to the corners of her bed, and though her sex had closed back to its usual narrow seam, deep inside she felt the bruising aftermath of many rough finger-thrusts. Her thighs and buttocks were sticky with dried effluvia. Worst of all were her breasts, covered in a disgusting crust of....
No. I can't bear to relive it.
She stared at the ceiling, numb. Her soul felt as filthy as her body. She was used. Violated. Unclean. Ruined.
After many minutes of silent despair, she sighed and began the slow work of freeing her immobilized limbs.
<<<<<<<>>>>>>>
Scalding water coursed down her chest. She'd long since scrubbed the vile remnants of Wormtongue's seed from her skin, but no matter how frequently she rasped her flesh with abrasives, no matter how many times she heated basins of bathwater to a boil and rinsed herself with the steaming liquid, she couldn't help but feel that it lingered and clung.
I'd better stop before I start losing skin. Anyway, my poor breasts have already taken more than enough abuse.
She gently swabbed the area between her thighs, and in an instant her arousal came alive.
Please,
please
not now!
She allowed herself a few tentative rubs, then forcefully shunted away the urge. The need to cleanse herself internally forced her to briefly quest inside her channel, and to her dismay her sex ignored her determination and tingled with excitement and expectation.
Cleansing turned to exploratory caresses, caresses to confident massaging, massaging to resigned capitulation. But it was of no use; her fingering brought plenty of pleasure but no release. Eventually, the water grew tepid and she stepped from the bath, her wet golden locks draping over the curves and valleys of her slender body while she stared blankly at the wall.
After a while, she sullenly wrapped herself in cottons and returned to her bed, shivering. A cold dawn had arrived while she dallied in the bath, and she needed to dress for an appearance before King Théoden, but she was drained of motivation and distracted by arousal.
Apparently there's some sort of controversy involving my brother Éomer, and someone will have to take his side...a responsibility that falls to me. He's ever at odds with the King and Council these days, and even I doubt that Wormtongue is the sole source of his conflict. The reason for, yes, but my brother falls into his snares as easily as I. Perhaps we're both ruled...or overruled...by our passions.
Neither the cold nor her responsibilities could erase the persistent yearning in her loins. Her attempts to fight it off or ignore it had proven useless, yet time was passing all too quickly. She'd either need to achieve satisfaction right now or suffer through hours of low-level arousal in the presence of the King and his counselors.
Even after a rapid-fire onslaught of new and unwanted experiences, even without the restoration of a good night's sleep after hours of outrageous assault, I'm still consumed by inconsolable erotic craving. I remain utterly repulsed by what was done to me, and yet I'm horny. I disgust myself.
With sudden decision she flung her wrappings aside, stroking and probing as efficiently as possible. One hand tweaked her soft breast, fingers worrying a swollen nipple. The other gently circled her clit, dipping a finger just inside. Her pleasure grew, but plateaued well short of her goal, and no amount of surface rubbing could coax it along. She closed her eyes and imagined strong, masculine hands doing the touching, but while she felt a mild swell in her heart, her sexual arousal barely increased. She cycled through favored fantasy partners, consciously avoiding any from Gondor lest they remind her of Wormtongue's tricks, but none of her personal gallery of images sufficed. In frustration she abraded herself harder and faster, and while this
did
measurably increase her pleasure, climax remained elusive.
Abandoning her nipple, she moved a second hand to her sex and roughly spread her slippery labia. Plunging two fingers as deep inside as she could manage — she was lubricated enough to accept the penetration in one swift motion — she tried to imagine
taking
herself as aggressively as a partner might. (
Which
partner was a question she deliberately avoided considering.) The effect was immediate, and her hips rolled with excitement, but once again an unsatisfying plateau was reached.
A third finger intruded, immediately followed by dismay at how easily her scarcely broached womanhood was accepting such ever-deeper, ever-wider intrusions.
But I don't have time to dwell on that now. I need to come. I'm incapable of starting my day without doing so. How have I arrived at this?
And then, a
fourth
finger. In no sense under her conscious control, but simply willed inward by her greedy sex, it easily slipped in right alongside the others in a moment between thrusts.
This is insanity. I've never before used, nor even remotely needed, this much of a physical presence inside me to reach orgasm.
Though it wasn't the widest she'd been stretched of late, for her fingers were long, thin, and graceful in comparison to...to....
No, I
still
won't think about him
. Coupled with an aggressive thumbing of her clit, it seemed that she might finally reach her goal. Faster and faster she pumped, her sore wrist aching anew, and at last, with a small jolt of pleasure, she came.
It was satisfying, and served to calm her jangling nerves, but it wasn't even close to....
Wrenching her fingers from her sex, she shunted the wretched memory into her determined wake and dressed for Council, eager for the comforting presence of her brother after all she'd been through.
<<<<<<<>>>>>>>
To her surprise, her meeting with the King went surprisingly well. Wormtongue lodged his usual objection that Éomer's raids ranged too far from Edoras and left the city vulnerable to attack. But to everyone's obvious relief it was a written objection, for he wasn't present in Council; in fact, no one seemed to know where he'd gone. The King limited himself to a rambling lecture against leaving the populous heart of the Mark under-defended, but didn't press the point. Eventually, he even mumbled a few words of praise for his nephew's tireless pursuit of their enemies, though he immediately undid their effect by impatiently demanding that his son Théodred — of like mind with Éomer and equally overwhelmed by endless skirmishes — be summoned back to Meduseld from his current post at the Fords of Isen.
She couldn't decide which made her happier: seeing her brother again, hearing the King make a decision without a counselor whispering words of defeat and surrender in his ear, or that Wormtongue was nowhere to be found. She even stole a few moments for a brief but loving reunion with Éomer, though she had to work hard to hide her personal turmoil from his keen eyes.
Perhaps there's hope for us after all. And I still hold to another.
Locking her door, she plucked a volume of rune-lore from a shelf, then extracted the stolen parchment from her secret nook, leaving the vial for later study. She plopped book, parchment, blank paper, drawing implements, and herself onto her bed, looking for all the world like a school-aged lass about to start her homework...and began the slow work of translation. She'd already confirmed, in the few brief moments she'd had to study the parchment lifted from Wormtongue's room, that the runes were indeed Elvish but in an archaic mode; one older than any of the usual references could decipher. Rohan wasn't a society based on lore or the wisdom of sages, but rather on its untamed Northern spirit, and she'd been lucky to find a useful reference in Meduseld's meager library. She hoped it would be enough.
<<<<<<<>>>>>>>
Many hours of struggle later, she dropped the heavy tome to the floor, exhausted.
If only I could read these runes as easily as I manage the thrust and parry of a sword.
The frustrating, often maddeningly fruitless work was taking far too long. Early indications were that the vials were an element in some sort of potion or magic, as part of the text seemed to be a recipe, or perhaps a procedure. But of or for
what
remained opaque.
Knowing that it could go ill were she caught at this activity, she tucked everything into her hiding place, double-checked that her door was locked and bolted, then prepared for sleep. It was already dark, and though she'd skipped the evening meal she wasn't hungry. She felt, despite everything, a vague sense that tomorrow would be the day her fortunes finally began to improve, and as she nestled under her covers she enjoyed a blissful moment of forgetfulness regarding the previous evening's misadventures. Until....
There it is again. That persistent, annoying urge.
Finding it absurd and almost slatternly that she'd need to pleasure herself yet again, she rolled to her side and willed herself towards sleep.
It didn't help. If anything, the yearning grew in intensity the more she tried to ignore it. With a resigned sigh, she realized she'd indeed have to pursue another orgasm before she could rest.