Fast to fly, then long in waiting,
Five months, nine months, till it's done.
Queen and rider share their purpose,
Clutch of many, clutch of one.
9th Pass -- Year 27 -- December
(Ista Weyr, December 15th)
Darian was badly upset. He stared at the blood-stained floor, his examining table, his hands. "I told you to restrict her flying. Why didn't you listen?"
"I couldn't," the Weyrleader answered. "I've already lost one queenrider. I couldn't afford another, especially when she didn't want to withdraw."
"Well, you've lost her now. She won't be worth a thirty-second for a month. So, you're down two anyhow, and she's lost a baby."
G'dened grimaced. Shortly after Scylenth's mating flight, the Cygnan had withdrawn again, sinking deeper into the depression Masterhealer Nerodian had warned them about. Even after the counseling sessions at Lemos, even with Elysina's help, his moods swung wildly, often with little or no reason. The relationship between Weyrleader and masterhealer was tenuous at best. He'd wondered what would finally trigger a confrontation between them. Selana's miscarriage had done it. At least they were keeping it civil. It was a discussion, not an argument.
"Darian, she didn't want that baby. What purpose does it serve to make her bear a child she doesn't want? Even if it is yours, isn't that kind of selfish?"
"Yes, it is," the avion sighed. "But she never said that to me. She could have continued to fly straight. I just didn't want her flying between."
G'dened stared at him. "That baby could have been yours, R'travil's or V'line's. If you need another child, wait a little longer. Elysina's about due. But don't make Sel feel guilty."
"I suppose Elysina's child is mine?"
"You know it is. According to El, nobody's been with her since Valkryth's last mating flight. Real mating flight. Nobody but you, that is. And the only time Valkryth has risen since then, she chose Astaroth. Elysina's insanely in love with you. Your kind of love, not ours. She's yours permanently."
Darian shrugged. "Okay, so her child is mine. That has nothing to do with Selana."
The Weyrleader closed his hands together, intertwining his fingers. "No, it doesn't," he agreed. "I'm sorry. But I need to ask another favor of you, one you're not going to like."
"Well, this has been the day for them. What do you want?"
"We need Valkryth to clutch. We need her dragons. The next time she rises, could you hold Astaroth out of the flight?"
The masterhealer sighed again, something he was doing all too often recently. "I guess so. Maybe. Who's most likely to fly her if it isn't Astaroth?"
"Either Clarinath or Kirth," the bronzerider replied.
Darian shook his head. He had lost Selana, and now he feared losing Elysina. He fought down the panic he felt rising in him. He could handle Clarinath or Kirth. He liked V'line and Tr'san. But there were others... and what if she chose to become the rider's weyrmate?
"I can't handle this twice, G'dened," he warned. "Not Selana and Elysina. I can't take it. V'line doesn't worry me, but she really likes Tr'san."
"You're not going to lose Elysina," the Weyrleader reassured him. "If you were, she wouldn't have latched onto you like she has. You're her weyrmate. A mating flight isn't going to change that."
"It sure wrecked my marriage to Sel."
"Yes," the Weyrleader allowed. "But that was Selana's first mating flight. It wasn't the flight that wrecked your marriage. It was how she reacted to it." He saw the anger building in the Cygnan and continued before he could speak. "Darian, don't. I know what you're going to say. Yes, R'travil was the cause and, yes, he was a total ass. You're right about that. But because of how Scylenth reacted, Selana had to have a bronzerider. Scylenth needed Clarinath to protect her from Quarelth, even just psychologically. That's why Sel and V'line became weyrmates. You even encouraged them. Shells, it was your idea. Even so, you're still married. Sel has made that clear. Elysina's been through this many times. She's not going to leave you."
Darian closed his eyes, lowering his head into his hands. "Do what you need to do," he replied quietly. His voice was dead, defeated. "You're going to anyhow. But at least wait until El has the baby. Please."
"Of course. Valkryth isn't going to rise while El's still pregnant."
"Alright. Tell Selana I'm going to do some tests. I'll be down in a bit."
"Would it help if I declared a restricted flight?" the Weyrleader offered.
The Cygnan looked up in disbelief. "You'd do that? Why?"
"Because, despite our differences, I still consider you a friend. Ista needs you. I know I'm asking a lot of you, so I need to offer at least something in return." He paused, looking to see if he had his masterhealer's full attention. He did. "If I declare a restricted flight, which dragons do you want assigned?"
"But why didn't you do this for us when Scylenth rose?"
"Those circumstances were very different," the Istan explained. "You can't restrict a queen's first flight. There are too many ramifications to be considered. I'm sorry, but that just wasn't going to happen."
Darian sat back in his chair. This he hadn't expected. Not from G'dened. Still, there was only one dragon in the weyr he wanted to let mate with Valkryth, and he was being withheld from this flight. "If it can't be Astaroth, it has to be Clarinath, Kirth or Sanadanth. Is that alright?"
G'dened nodded. "Clarinath, Kirth and Sanadanth it is. I'll make the arrangements. I leave it to you to tell V'line, Tr'san, N'pol and Elysina." He was starting back into the Weyr tunnels when a thought struck him. "D, would you like to go back to Lemos for a while? Maybe get away from here for a few seven-days? I could arrange to send El with you."
"Is this a polite way of saying that you want me back in counseling?"
"Only if you think you need it. I'm sure the masterhealers could find some time for you if you want it. Just thought you might like to get away for a while."
"Thanks, but not right now," the avion declined. "There's just too much going on here. Besides, if you send both me and El off, I'm not all that confident that Selana and Rubia can handle the weyr."
"Selana was Weyrhealer at Eastern," the bronzerider reminded him.
"She didn't have a queen to care for at Eastern. And she's in no condition to be handling a Weyr. Not a good idea, Weyrleader. At least, not right now."
"I can ask Master Oldive if he could send Jenira back for a couple of seven-days. I think he'd do it for you."
The Cygnan smiled. He thought about the Craft Master, thought about the Healer Hall and the people in it. Despite himself, he'd become acquainted with several of the healers. He even considered Oldive, Nerodian and Kimmel friends. Yes, they would probably send Jenira back, but they needed her at the Hall. He couldn't keep imposing on them.
"No. I think we've asked enough of the Healer Hall recently. Let's just leave it alone."
G'dened nodded. "Okay. But if you need some time away, let me know. I'll send Elysina with you."
He turned and left the infirmary. He was biting his lip as he walked, wondering what other trouble the avion could stir up. He had to admit, though, that the off-worlder was an excellent masterhealer. He needed him in the Weyr.
He couldn't have stopped Selana if he'd wanted to. How do you tell a queenrider not to ride her own dragon? She'd done most of her recent flying on errands for the Healer Hall, not fighting. She'd been disappointed in Scylenth's clutch, which really wasn't bad. Twenty-two was a respectable first laying and at least two of the eggs were large enough to hold browns or bronzes. No queen egg, but that was also normal for a first clutch.
Selana's concerns over the size of Scylenth's eggs doubtless further convinced her that the child she carried was R'travil's. Anyone with a basic knowledge of dragons knew what flying between would do to a pregnant woman. The bronzerider had no doubt that she had done it intentionally, forcing the abortion.
Caylith could have stopped the junior queen, but there didn't seem much reason for it. Why make the woman have a child she didn't want, that she actually feared? It didn't make sense. Well, this way, he'd have them back in one month instead of seven. Darian might not like it, but that was the way it was, and that was fine by him.
'You're upset. Can I help?'
'I'm alright. I'm a little worried about Darian.'
'Why? He seems to be strong.'
'He is, but he's been through a lot. He's really unhappy. Selana just lost a baby. Darian thinks it was his. And now he's afraid he'll lose Elysina in the mating flight.'
'Valkryth says Elysina will never leave him. Why doesn't she tell Darian that?'
'I think she has, but I'm not sure he believes her. He's still too close to Scylenth's mating flight. You would think his time at Lemos would have ended that.'
'I don't know what we can do about that. Do you want me to ask Astaroth?'
'Not sure it would help. This is up to Darian. We'll see how he does in the next few days.'
'Is it alright if I talk to Astaroth? He can talk to Darian.'
'That's up to you, big fella. It's alright with me. Let me know if he says anything useful.'
G'dened knew he had to cheer up before he entered Selana's weyr. He couldn't act depressed or worried. She had enough problems of her own. By the time he reached the queenrider's weyr he was whistling, burying his concerns in the tune.
A curious head peeked out through the sleeping chamber curtain. "Somebody's in a good mood. I thought you two were going to kill each other."
Smiling at his mate, the bronzerider explained. "He's not happy, but he'll be alright. We didn't fight. Didn't even argue. Just had a rather serious conversation." He nodded at the curtain. "I'll tell you about it later. You'll need to know this. How's she doing?"
