Demi Lovato hadn't been alone in a room with Selena Gomez for years. It felt like several lifetimes, and in a way it was. They both weren't the little girls who swore they would be best friends forever. Now those little girls were gone, in the place two 'adults' who were strangers to each other.
It was her younger self's worst nightmare come true, and when she stepped into the dressing room and close the door behind her Demi had to stop for a minute to prevent herself from getting overwhelmed and crying. At least not before she did what she should have done years ago, and tell Selena the truth about how she felt.
"Demi, it's so great to see you again." Selena said, trying to make her smile genuine but it was kind of hard when she wasn't sure what Demi would say or do.
"Yeah, you too." Demi mumbled, losing her nerve as she suddenly found herself studying the ground.
"Sooooo, you wanted to talk?" Selena questioned softly. There was then a long pause and then Selena sighed, "Demi, I'm not trying to be a bitch, but I'm literally performing in five minutes. If you want to come back later you can take as much time as you need, but-"
"No, no, no!" Demi insisted, "I swear this will only take a minute. And I don't want to be tempted to stay and talk afterwards. I want you to really think about it without me."
"Okay then." Selena sighed, "So talk."
There was another pause and then Demi said, "Remember when we were... us?"
Selena smiled softly, "Of course I remember."
"Well I've never been happier." Demi blurted out, "Have you?"
There was yet another pause and then Selena smiled softly, "Demi, if you want to try and be best friends again I'm more than happy to try. But realistically we're both very busy, and different people, and-"
"I know, I know, I know... but we always made time for each other when we were teens, and I really want to get to know the new you." Demi insisted.
Smiling again Selena stood, walked towards her old friend and nodded, "Then why don't you stay here? I've got snacks, and when I'm done we can catch up."
Demi took a deep breath. She could leave it at that and maybe she would get Selena back as her friend, and maybe that would really be enough this time. But deep down she knew it never would. Knew that it would be worse.
That once again being forced to be around this wonderful girl and not kiss and touch her would be the same kind of torture which had drove her to drugs, alcohol and cutting herself.
So for the sake of her mental health she had to not only say it out loud, but finally say it to Selena's face. Even if Selena rejected her it would help, because then maybe she could finally move on.
"I don't want to be your friend!" Demi blurted out, "I never... I never wanted to be just your friend."
There was a long pause, the longest yet, which only ended when there was a knock on the door letting Selena know she was needed on stage, causing her to swear softly, "Shit."
Demi was almost taken aback by just that, as Selena never used to swear, but she had a lot more to worry about so she quickly started rambling, "I know it's sudden, and you're with someone, and we're not exactly who we used to be, but I know you Selena. I know you better than anyone ever could. I've seen your beautiful soul, and no matter what's happened you can't have change that much, but I'm sure I'd love all the new parts of you just as much, so when I heard you were into girls, I just had to come here. Even if it wasn't true I, I needed to tell you, because it's killing me. It, it almost killed me. But, if you give me a chance, I swear I'll do whatever you want, worship the ground you walk on, anything! Just please think about it... and, and don't hate me."
As Demi was talking Selena turned her back to her and started writing something down for some reason. When she finished Selena came back to stand right in front of Demi and tried several times to interrupt, but Demi wouldn't let her. The floodgates were opened and she just couldn't keep her secret inside any more.
She had to get it out, even if she barely paused to breathe in between the words, and she cried so much that she could barely see and must have looked like a total mess. Of course Demi was convinced she was about to get rejected, so it didn't really matter.
When Demi finally finished the was a pause, followed by another knock and an insistence that Selena get a move on, prompting the younger brunette to shove a piece of paper into Demi's hand and tell her, "This is where I'm staying tonight. Please, please, please come over after the show, and we'll... talk."
With that Selena left a dazed and confused Demi behind her as she left her to perform. Demi just stood there staring at the now shut door, trying desperately not to get her hopes up, but it was impossible.
Honestly the most likely scenario was that Selena just wanted time to shoot her down as gently and quietly as possible, but now she had not been angrily rejected Demi couldn't help but hold onto the idea that maybe, just maybe, after having some time to weigh up the pros and cons Selena would agree to give dating a shot, a.k.a. make Demi's dreams come true. She probably should have known better.
*
The address Selena had given Demi was also really promising, because it was for a very expensive hotel suite which Demi knew for a fact was soundproof, which made it perfect for certain celebrities to hook up without anyone finding out.
Of course it was mostly used by celebrities eager to indulge in a little same sex fun, and as an in the closet gay woman Demi had spent a lot of time in this hotel, and even the suite she was going too.
And as she nervously took the elevator to the very top floor of the building she thought how she probably wouldn't have survived this long without the truth about her sexuality coming out if it wasn't for this place. At lease when she was not freaking out about the possibility of actually getting to be with Selena Gomez.
Fortunately she wasn't the only one excited, because about a second after she knocked on the right door it opened to reveal a smiling Selena, "Hey."
"Hey." Demi smiled nervously back.
"Well, aren't you going to come in?" Selena grinned, moving aside so Demi could nervously step into the suite. Then when she had close the door Selena whispered, "Just try and keep an open mind, okay?"