(This series is pure fantasy. Please enjoy it as such.)
I was somewhat surprised to hear last week that the Celebrity Sexfight that garnered the most views from our website was the pillow fight between Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian.
Apparently the chance to see Paris peeing her panties was too tempting to pass up. Even though the blonde beauty ran off the set humiliated, I had to ask her back for another chance to prove herself. I was shocked that she eagerly accepted the invitation. Her only stipulation was that she wanted us to guarantee that she would be the winner this time.
I told her that predetermined outcomes weren't the way we did things. The matches were to be decided fair and square.
The blonde beauty pouted, but wanted a chance for redemption. She came up with an interesting proposition.
"What if I told you that I have an opponent in mind who already agreed that she would let me win."
Needless to say, I was intrigued. I couldn't just let her leave me hanging, I had to know who she had in mind.
Paris flashed an innocent smile, knowing that I was interested. She teased me for a bit before letting me know her opponent.
"Cameron Diaz!"
I thought she was bullshitting me. Cameron was one of the first celebrities I contacted when putting this together. She told me that she wasn't interested. Either Paris was lying or she somehow convinced her friend to change her mind. I was shocked when I found out that the beautiful blonde star of There's Something About Mary agreed to be on the losing end of a Sexfight with Paris.
Against my better judgment, I went ahead and scheduled a match between the two stars. I simply couldn't pass up the chance to have Paris Hilton again. Especially if her opponent was Cameron Diaz, someone I've had a crish on ever since I first laid eyes on her.
We had another packed house for the battle of the hot blondes. Little did they know the outcome was predetermined. I felt a little guilty, thinking I had cheated the audience. Hopefully it would still be entertaining.
Once again, Jimmy Kimmel was on hand to emcee the event. He's been a surprise participant in a couple of the other matches that he worked. I wonder if he'll join in with these two gorgeous blondes.
The sleepy-eyed late night talk show host entered the ring, ready to get things rolling.
"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Celebrity Sexfights! Where your favorite stars will pur their killer bodies on the line to prove their sexual superiority."
"Tonight we have two beautiful blondes for your wanking pleasure."
"Our first contestant is a beautiful actress, star of such classics as The Mask, Bad Teacher, and There's Something About Mary. Well, there's something about having Ben Stiller's jiz in your hair. Please welcome CAMERON DIAZ!!"
Cameron entered the arena flashing her trademark huge grin, strolling down the runway in a bright white string bikini. She waved to the crowd before climbing into the ring, ready to do battle.
"Taking on Cameron tonight is another beautiful young lady...PARIS HILTON!!"
Paris walked in, with her silky blonde hair tied back in a ponytail, wearing a skimpy pink bikini, holding her pet poodle, Fifi.
Jimmy commented as she walked down the aisle, hugging her four-legged friend.
"Paris used to be followed around by paparazzi. Now she's being followed by a pack of poodles."
Paris handed off her tiny white puppy to one of her bodyguards, and got into the ring, staring sexily at her opponent in the other corner.
If Cameron was gonna throw this fight, you couldn't really tell. She looked as if she was ready to tangle with the spoiled rich girl.
Jimmy was eager to get the match going. immediately gathering them at the center of the ring, going over the ground rules. It was pretty simple. The first person to get the other to cum would be the winner.
Paris and Cameron stood toe to toe, staring each other down, ready to get this show on the road. Paris appeared to be confident, which was no surprise, considering she talked Cameron into throwing the match for her.
The sexual duel began without much drama, with both women carefully circling each other, looking for the perfect place to attack.
Cameron was the aggressor, putting Paris in a headlock and taking her down to the mat. She didn't look like someone that was supposed to lose. She even tugged on the strings of her friend's top, rendering Paris topless in a matter of seconds.
Paris had modest breasts, but they were very firm. Her dime-sized nipples looked very succulent as she tried to fend off her horny rival.
Paris was a bit confused by Cameron's move, thinking the fix was in. A look of shock was apparent as the skinny blonde couldn't believe her good friend would renege on their agreement. She reached for her friend's white top, hoping to even things up. Cameron playfully slapped Paris on the wrist, keeping her bikini intact.
To say Paris was frustrated would be an understatement. The pouty blonde was used to getting her way. Instead, Cameron put her in a bear hug, squeezing her from behind as they both sat on the floor. The athletic prowess of Cameron was taking shape as she seemed to be in total control. The smiling blonde actress began kissing Paris on the neck, occasionally sticking her moist tongue in her ear.
Paris struggled to break free, trying to pry Cameron's arms loose, giving her room to move. The feisty heiress managed to bust out, turning and facing her foe, pinning Cameron to the mat. The slinky blonde finally had things going her way as she hovered over her friend, with her tiny tits in Cameron's face.
A look of satisfaction emanated from Paris as her rival began sucking on her pert nipples. Cameron didn't seem to mind being on her back as long as she got to feast on Paris's luscious titties. She swirled her tongue around the pink nipples before playfully biting them.
It looked as if maybe Cameron was tanking. Paris liked being on top without much pushback. While she had the upper hand, she went for Cameron's top. Paris tried to reach behind, searching for some strings to tug, but Cam kept shifting her body, making it nearly impossible.
The skinny rich girl was frustrated. She wanted to get her friend's top off in the worst way, forgetting for a moment that it wasn't supposed to be easy.
"Cameron?! Hold still!"