Celebrity Pickup Game #1: Lucy Liu vs. Shaq
Trying her best to stomach a $5 box of stale, barely buttered popcorn, Lucy Liu watched from her seat in section 104, courtside at Los Angeles's new basketball arena, The Staples Center. One of the perks she had treated herself to following her success on Ally McBeal and the subsequent movie roles, including a starring role in the upcoming remake of Charlie's Angels, was season tickets to all the Laker home games.
She had always been an energetic sports enthusiast and was maniacal about staying in shape, so she had always loved the pace and athleticism that basketball offered. As much as she went to the games to see the game itself however, living in LA offered the bonus opportunity to spend hour after hour of celebrity watching. She looked through the crowd with child like admiration at all the stars surrounding her. Even though she was a star now herself and many fans stared at her, Lucy couldn't help but study people like Nicholson, Whoopi and Speilberg scattered throughout the crowd as they watched the game with her.
Looking up at the scoreboard, seeing that the Lakers were up by 20 over the Nuggets with 6 minutes left, Lucy decided to ease up a couple of rows to try and strike up a conversation with a middle aged blonde that had reserved seats directly in front of her.
One of the idiosyncrasies of Los Angeles crowds was that they arrived late and frequently left early. With this night's game well in hand, Lucy decided to sneak up a few rows, stepping over the seats in her skin tight black slacks and introduce herself to the fortyish beauty she had many times recognized on TV attending Laker games. Her name was Dyan Cannon.
Awkwardly stepping over each of the seats, Lucy finally reached the same aisle that Dyan was sitting.
"Hi," Lucy said, startling the mature, pretty blonde.
"Ohhh... you scared me... hello to you... you're that girl from Ally McBeal... Ling... right?" Dyan replied, slowing regaining her breath.
Dyan quickly extended her hand and the two women shared typical "LA handshake" of mutual stardom.
"Lucy... Lucy Liu, pleased to meet you Ms. Cannon," Lucy smiled back.
"Oh dear God... you knew my name. I'm surprised anybody as young as you remembers me... " Dyan replied gleefully over the light din of the crowd.
"Oh yeah, my brother used to have posters of you all over his room, and of course I have always saw you courtside back when the team plaid at the Forum. I've got season tickets right here behind you," Lucy said pleasantly.
The two women continued to talk for the remaining 5 minutes of the ballgame. As the final buzzer sounded and the remaining fans began filtering up the steps to leave, Dyan told Lucy that she had a dinner date to meet at 10:30.
"I'd love to stay and chat... I love your show Lucy... we have to get together sometime for lunch. I'd really love to get together and hear all the dirt about what goes on behind the scenes at the show," Dyan flattered as she left.
As Lucy prepared to say goodbye when suddenly Dyan yelled towards the court.
"Hey Kobe," Dyan screamed so that all the players turned to look.
Kobe looked up into the crowd and smiled at his blonde admirer. "Hey Dyan... you coming by later?"
"Can't make it tonight sweetie... already have a date... we'll do it again sometime," Dyan said reassuringly.
Kobe waved and smiled as he left the court, victorious with his team.
"You really know him?" Lucy asked, looking a little more than surprised.
"Oh Yeah," Dyan replied." As big as LA is, the social circle here is still pretty small. We are always bumping into each other. Sometimes some of the movers and shakers hang out with a few of the guys in the players' lounge outside the locker room... no big deal. I'd love to stay and chat Lucy... but this guy I'm meeting tonight for dinner is doing a movie and I'm trying to weasel my way in... but we'll get together... OK... "
"I look forward to it," Lucy gleamed, watching her new middle aged friend ascend the stairs and leave.
"Players lounge, huh," Lucy thought to herself. I guess since I'm a star now they might even let me in."
Even though she had to be on the Ally McBeal set at 7am sharp, looking at her watch seeing that it still was only 9:30 in the evening, Lucy figured a few minutes of mingling and carousing wouldn't hurt.
Bouncing down the half dozen or so steps onto the large hardwood court, Lucy strolled past an elderly, smiling security guard posted on the floor. Rather than stopping her and questioning her, he simply tipped his cap and watched as the Asian beauty wearing a pair of skin tight black slacks, heels and a light blue tank top gracefully walked by.
As she made her way by the gauntlet of yellow jacketed security, many of whom had stopped autograph seeking kids and female groupies, Lucy was amazed she was able to quietly walk through without incident as she made her way to the backstage area of the arena.
Reaching the inner sanctum of the coliseum, Lucy tried her best to blend in with the "in" crowd milling about the hallways in the bowels of the Staples Center. Somehow, Lucy felt she had been transported through some kind of dimensional portal. One moment she had been in a cavernous basketball arena and the next she was surrounded by movie stars, entertainers, wanna be hangers' on, a ton of agents on their cell phones, and plenty of free food and wine in a cramped lounge.
Lucy gladly took a glass of pink champagne from one of the male servers and continued to mingle.
About 20 minutes later, several of the players began to emerge from the adjoining locker room and worked their way through the assembled crowd. Lucy recognized many of the players from watching them on TV and even made brief eye contact with coach Phil Jackson as he passed by on the way out of the arena to head for home.
The music in the background picked up as well as the players gradually worked there way around the room. Lucy found herself swaying slightly to the bass rhythms as she laughed and caroused with a few strangers.
As she continued to dance in place, suddenly a hand reached and with a heavy but gentle tug, pulled her around by the shoulder.
The lovely Asian actress turned to see who was trying to get her attention, only to look up and see nothing but the buttons of an expensive shirt right in front of her face.