I'm Jason Connors, I use to just be the average writer down at the Daily News, but ever since my very public relationship with Natalie Portman, I had been turned into a full time celebrity interviewer. Well, actually, in truth I was briefly fired but when Natalie offered to give me the names of several hot shot celebrities, I was back in the game, this time I'm a celebrity interviewer.
Well, things have been going well for the past 7 months or so. After a rather odd start to my new career path, things have settled down. Oh, and by odd I mean having sex with the people I'm interviewing, but that was only a 2 time thing. Once with Kate Bosworth and the other time with Michelle Monaghan. It's been 3 or so months since I had an interview with Mariska Hargitay from Law & Order SVU (I didn't screw her by the way, I was very professional), after we had finished; she had offered to get me some interviews with other celebs in TV. So for the weeks after that I started interviewing a lot of her co- workers from Law & Order SVU. Once again I would like to say that Mariska Hargitay and I are strictly friends, we don't even flirt. Anyway, in the end I ended up interviewing so many people I didn't have to do much for about 2 or so months, just crappy filler articles. And not to mention when I told the Daily News editor I was considering giving my business to another paper, they offered to pay me even more. This was the second time I had managed to squeeze more money out of them.
However once I did sell a rather good article to another paper, the Daily News shit their pants and so they were forced to hire me permanently once more. The last time I was employed here, the boss got pissed off that I never handed in my articles in time and when I did they were usually pretty scrappily done. Anyway, SVU didn't have an infinite cast so eventually I had to start interviewing again. Natalie Portman, my usual informant and ex- girlfriend was out of town shooting some new movie so I couldn't get any anything from her. Oh, and FYI, the whole thing with Natalie has also cooled down, now it's just general flirting although we did have sex again 3 times after the Michelle Monaghan interview. This was bad, I'm on the payroll again and I have no pending interviews and Natalie Portman was out of town. I'm actually surprised that Natalie still helped me out finding interviews, I mean sure she felt guilty about me losing my job in the first place but I thought once she got me started then she would back off. Maybe she's continuing to help because there's a slim chance we might get back together or maybe there might be another chance of us having random sex.
Anyway, back to my no interview problem, I didn't want to call Mariska Hargitay as she'd helped me out enough, Kate Bosworth, the first person I had screwed on the job, was filming a movie and Michelle Monaghan I haven't even spoke to since our encounter. I was looking in the TV guide and after a while this article caught my eye. The cast of the new drama movie Rendition was in town to promote the movie. This could work out very well for me I thought. According to the article, 2 main cast members, Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon were in town to do an interview on Letterman. I knew New York like the back of my hand, and if I recall, when Natalie and I were going out, she mentioned that nearly all interstate guests who went on Letterman stayed at the Hilton Hotel downtown. I picked up the phone and dialled the number for the Hilton. Let's see if I can get myself an interview with the cast of Rendition.
After a lot of discussion with the actor's managers, I managed to get an interview with the two cast members. The plan was I would interview Jake Gyllenhaal before the Letterman taping and Reese Witherspoon after. The taping took place in the afternoon so I had to get to the Hilton Hotel in a couple of hours. I was actually kinda surprised that I was allowed to interview them due to such short notice but I think because a press conference was cancelled, they needed to make up the publicity. Talk about luck I thought. Only 20 minutes ago I was completely stuff and all of a sudden I have a 2 part article.
First interview with Jake Gyllenhaal was pretty good considering I only hade 2 hours to write up some questions. The guy was pretty friendly and I got some free beer on his tab so it all worked out well. After the interview I stayed in the hotel bar and started typing the interview out my laptop. I was there for a good 3 hours before the actors returned to the hotel. In that time I had wrote a draft for the first part of the article, prepared the Reese Witherspoon interview, watched some cable TV and drank a lot of alcohol. But strangely I was still sober, or so I thought. Jake came down to say hi before heading up to his room. After about 5 minutes Reese Witherspoon arrived and we sat down in the booth.
'Been here long?' she asked in that sweet southern accent of hers.
'Nah, only just arrived,' I lied. 'So do you wanna do the interview here or you wanna head up to your room?'
'Down here is fine, I need to get some alcohol in me anyway.'
'I know that feeling, how was Letterman?'
'Great, it was good fun.'
'Crap, I should really introduce myself,' I extended a hand and she shook it. 'Jason Connors, writer for the Daily News.'
'I'm guessing you already know my name.'
I was trying to act professional but she wore this really sexy black dress and I couldn't help but stare at her cleavage. Luckily I don't think she noticed. And so the interview began. I asked simple questions about the new movie, fame, Oscars, her future, family, friends and all that crap. I was unaware at how sarcastic I was slowly becoming. It was the alcohol.
'And so how are you coping now with your divorce now?'
'Well I'm fine but I'm just mainly worried about the kids.'
'Ah don't worry, I can't imagine that guy being much of a dad.'
Yeah, believe it, I said that and many other things.
'Getting much more publicity after Walk the Line?'
'Yeah, the offers are just rolling in. And I think that now people are offering me much more mature roles which is just great.'
'Get anything with a decent sex scene in it?'
She was obvious surprised by the question but answered it none the less.
'Not really, I don't usually go for the sex oriented scripts.'
By the time we were finished about 20 minutes later I think we were both just aching to get some rest and she was just aching to get rid of me. As I stood up and stumbled around for a moment and she obviously noticed it. I hadn't realised that in the past few hours I really started to get drunk. But it was supposedly noticeable as I realised I had probably been slurring my words and losing focus these past few minutes. Reese now realised why I was so blunt and so rude. I was drunk.
'You are so drunk.'
'I wish. One more beer should do it.'
'How long were you really waiting here before I arrived?'
'Not long, 15 minutes...ok 30... ok 1 hour.'
She laughed and gave me that big smile of hers. 'And I take it you were drinking most of that time.'
'Yeah well, your friend Mr Gyllenhaal offered to buy me drinks so how could I resist.'
'Wait, you interviewed Jake before we went to Letterman. How long have you been here.'
'3 hours.'
She chuckled again. 'You drive here?'
'Yep.'
'Well you ain't driving back like this. You can stay in my hotel room until you sober up.'
'Sweet, thanks.'
'But no funny business, I'm single but I'm far from a swinger.'
I tried to grab my laptop but in the process almost dropped it so Reese took all my stuff up for me. I don't think I'm technically drunk, just sort of disoriented and clumsy. However I think I did pass out once I got into her room.
When I woke up, it was 1 o'clock at night and I was lying on a very comfortable couch. I stood up and took a drink of water from the fridge before I realised this wasn't my apartment.
'You're up,' said a voice I recognised as Reese Witherspoon's.
She was standing in the doorway of her room, noticeably tired and I could tell I just woke her up.
'Ok, the last few hours is kinda a blur, fill me in.'
'Well you became drunk during the course of our interview so I brought you up here to sober up.'
'I wasn't that drunk was I?'
'At first to be honest I thought you were just an asshole but then I realised you were drinking your brains out. Coffee is a better way of staying awake.'