Big Bang Theory Season 08 Ep 24

The lights were turned down low and Sheldon and Amy were locked in a passionate kiss sitting on his sofa. She pulled back, "Can you believe it's been five years since our first date?"

He smiled at her, "I know. Do you think I should start watching The Flash TV show?'

She looked at him, "That's what you're thinking about?"

"Well, one of the things."

In an irritated voice she replied, "Are any of them about me."

He nodded, "Yes. I thought, "I can't decide if I should watch "The Flash" TV show. I know, I'll ask Amy" He leaned in for a kiss, "Anyway..."

She pulled back, waving her hands from side to side, "What are you doing?"

"You're right. You did kind of kill the mood." He got up and moved to the kitchen.

"I didn't kill anything. You did, talking about your stupid TV show."

"Excuse me, starting to watch a television show that might run for years isn't a decision to take lightly. I'm wrestling with a big commitment issues here."

Now she was really pissed and stood, and moved over to where he was standing, "Really? That's the commitment issue you're wresting with? Sheldon, do you understand the irony of your fixation on a man with super speed, while after five years all I can get out of you is a distracted make-out session on a couch?"

He looked worried, "Irony's not really my strong suit. But I have been getting better with sarcasm if you want to give that a try."

Sarcastically she replied, "Oh, sure, I'd love to."

They stood there looking at one another and Sheldon suddenly replied, "Whenever you're ready."

While that was happening, at the comic book store Emily and Raj were looking through the comics and Stuart came over to them, "I don't want to rush you, but I'm closing early tonight."

Raj looked up, "Oh, hot date?"

"No, I overheard Bernadette tell Howard she's making him a meatloaf and you don't have to not ask me twice."

While they were talking, Emily found a skull with three swords sticking out of its skull. She picked it up and brought it over to Raj, "If I stick a lightbulb on this wouldn't it make a great lamp for my bedroom?"

He stared at her, "You're kidding, right?"

"Oh, is this freaking you out?"

"Well, I guess I'm just more of a Pottery Barn, Crate & Barrel kind of guy." He saw her nod and continued, "Maybe Pier 1 if I really want to cut loose."

She looked disappointed, "All right, never mind."

She turned to put it back and Raj stopped her, "No, hey, you should totally get it. In fact, I'll buy it for you."

Before she could reply Stuart called out, "Sold!"

She looked to Stuart and then back to Raj, "You don't have to do that."

Stuart yelled out, "Too late, no returns!"

Back at the apartment, Penny and Leonard were just returning from the farmer's market and he was shook up, "That was really intense."

"Yeah, now we know, next time we go to the farmer's market the order is petting zoo first, then buy vegetables."

Leonard opened the door and saw Sheldon before his computer, "Hey."

"Oh, good, you're here. I need your assistance."

Penny came over to him, "So, what do you need help with?"

"Amy's mad at me, and I'm not clear why."

"Okay, were you talking before she got upset?"

Sheldon nodded, "Yes."

"That's probably it. What did you say to her?"

"I just asked her if I should start watching the new "Flash TV" series."

She looked at him skeptical that what was all, "And that made her angry?"

"Baffling, right? We were necking like a couple of hooligans under the school bleachers. I stopped so I could ask the question. Next thing I know, goodbye, kissy face, hello yell-y face."

Penny knew the problem immediately, "Sheldon, when you're kissing a girl, she expects the attention to be on her."

"It was I asked her if I thought I should watch "The Flash."

She stepped away, "Yeah, I'm tapping out, Leonard?""

He looked up after putting a Band-Aid on his goat- bite, "I guess your main concern is the time commitment of watching an entire season of a new show."

Penny stepped back in, "What's wrong with you two? He was talking about television during their date night."

Sheldon broke in, "Oh, not just date night, but our fifth anniversary of our first date."

She threw up her hands, "Okay, that's even dumber than you wondering if being bitten by a goat would give you the powers of a goat."

At the Wolowitz kitchen, Howard and Raj were setting the table as Bernadette finished cooking. Raj turned to them, "Have you guys noticed Emily has a bit of a twisted side?"

Bernie turned away from the stove, "Because she had weird tattoos?"

"No, because she wants to have sex with me in a graveyard."

Howard turned towards him, not sure what he heard, "One more time?"

Raj threw up his arms, "She and I were supposed to watch the new Avengers movie tonight, but it was sold out. I said, "What else do you want to do?" She said: "Let's go to a cemetery and do it on somebody's grave."

Howard chuckled, "Like, a random person or somebody she knew?"

Raj couldn't believe the question, "What difference does it make?"

"Well, if it's her father's grave and they didn't get along, then you know she holds a grudge."

Bernie stepped in, "The only issue is that everybody had their own thing. As long as it's two consenting adults, I don't see the harm in it."

"What if its one consenting adult and one who pretends to consent because he's afraid of being alone?"

She shrugged, "Well, then I guess bring a blanket. The grass gets damp at night."

Raj moved to the table, "I don't know, guys. Maybe this relationship isn't for me. Maybe I should break up with her."

Howard laughed out loud, "Right, you're gonna break up with a girl who has sex with you. Can you believe this guy?"

Bernadette came over to Howard, "I think if Raj wants to break up with a girl, he can do it."

He stared at her, "How are you saying that with a straight face?"

She cracked up, "I don't know." They both laughed out loud.

Raj was getting pissed, "You guys are being jerks!"

Howard sat down, "Look, buddy, other than Jenny Craig, you've never broken up with a girl in your life."

"You're one to talk. You've been complaining about Stuart living here for the past year. I don't see you showing him the door."

Howard chuckled, "Not the same thing, Emily's a person. Stuart's more like an infestation, something you spray for."

Raj wasn't buying it, "Baloney, okay? You two are as afraid of hurting someone's feelings as I am."

Bernadette came over and crossed her arms under her large breasts, "That's not true. We were just laughing right in your face."

The following evening, Leonard just finished making dinner for the three of them. Sheldon was getting worried, he kept checking his phone.

Penny took a sip of her iced tea, "Still haven't heard from her?"

He looked up, "No, and I'm confused. It's been nearly 24 hours. Amy should have figured out she's wrong by now."

Penny rolled her eyes at him, "I don't think she's wrong about you going too slow in the relationship."

He made a weird face, "Too slow?"

"Yeah you two have been going together for five years, and you haven't even slept together. "

"That's right; it's called foreplay. And I could make the case that you two aren't moving forward in your relationship"

She had a shocked look on her face. She raised her hand with the engagement ring on it and waved it in his face, "Uhhhhhh, hello?"

He was confused and waved back, "Hello."

Penny buried her face in her hands, "No, Sheldon, we're getting married." She pointed to her ring.

"You've been engaged for over a year now. You don't even have a wedding date."

"Well, we will; we're just not in a rush."

Sheldon shrugged, "Okay."

Leonard felt an uneasiness at the table, "We're gonna set a date."

Sheldon nodded, "Okay, if you say so."

Penny added, "Yeah, things are good right now."

Leonard added, "Really good."

Penny began again, sounding really defensive, "I'm focusing on my job."

Leonard did the same, "Been busy with our paper. We'll pick a date when we pick a date."

She nodded, "Yeah!"

Sheldon looked up from his salad, "Okay."

Penny put down here fork and yelled at Sheldon, "You know, I can see why Amy's mad at you."

Leonard yelled at him too, "Yeah, shut up, Sheldon!"

In the Wolowitz's living room, Howard was checking his e-mails when Bernadette came in, "Did you eat my yogurt?"

"You mean the one that makes ladies do the thing ladies pretend they don't, even though they do?"

She gave him an evil stare, "You know... which yogurt... I mean!"

He shrugged, "I didn't touch it. It must've been Stuart."

She let out a grunt and came over and sat beside him, "Maybe Raj was right. Maybe it's time we tell him he needs to move out."

He agreed, "We should've done it months ago."

"I know, but his store was reopening, and then there were the holidays, and then he was sick."

Howard scoffed, "Yeah, right. Sick!" He slammed his laptop shut, "Look, he didn't have jaundice, he just looks like that."

She put her foot down, "You're right, tonight's the night."

"Agreed, when he gets home, I'm dropping the hammer."

She was getting turned-on by her take charge man. She placed her hand on his knee and squeezed, "I like it when you take charge."

He stared at her, "Oh, I'm not taking charge, you're the hammer."

Back at the apartment, Penny and Leonard were cleaning up after dinner. Leonard turned to Penny, "So why haven't we picked a date?"

"You know why?"

"Oh course I know why, but just for fun, why?"

She began rattling off reasons, "Not in a rush, busy with work."

Sheldon was on his computer and cut in, "Things are good right now."

Penny yelled back, "Really good!"

Leonard was getting concerned, "You still want to get married, right?"

Her voice jumped a few octaves, "Oh, my God, Yes! Why would you even ask that?"

He shrugged, "I don't know; maybe because we don't have a date?"

"You want a date, pick a date."

He was getting frustrated, "It's not just the date. We haven't talked about anything. Big wedding, small wedding, indoor, outdoor?"

She threw up her arms, 'Okay, indoor it is, big or small?"

He replied, "Is your dad paying for it?"

She chuckled, "I doubt it."

"Okay, two friends each."

"Okay, all right, I want it in a church."

"Fine, I want black tie."

She grinned at him. ,"Fine, I want to release butterflies."

Sheldon cut in, "Seriously? Airborne worms?"

Leonard ignored him, "Okay, well, then it's settled. Small indoor church wedding, black tie, no butterflies."

She smiled, "Sounds perfect."

He replied, "Great!" He turned away and they finished cleaning the kitchen.

Sheldon replied from his desk, "You still didn't pick a date."

They both yelled at him, "Stay out of it! Shut up!"

Raj took Bernadette's advice and brought a blanket to the cemetery. He spread it out as Emily opened up the wine and picnic basket. She looked hot in a clinging red turtleneck top, accenting her ripe breasts. She had on brown boots and a pair of royal blue slacks. She began pouring the wine, "It's a beautiful night. We are going to really get it on out here."

He cleared his throat, "Oh, yeah! We've got the moon and the trees and..." He looked over his shoulder at the nearby tombstone, "Elizabeth McNulty, who apparently died when she was the same age I am."

She flashed him a smile and handed him his wine and leaned in closer, "Makes you feel alive, doesn't it?"

"So does enjoying a meal at a well-lit restaurant, but here we are."

They toasted and took a sip of their wine and she leaned back, "You aren't scared, are you?"

"Oh ghosts, no! Oh you, a little bit."

Back at the apartment Sheldon was trying to ease the tension, "I'm sorry I've upset you. I shouldn't have asked so many questions."

Penny was in the living room reading a magazine, sipping her wine, "No, it's okay."

Leonard took a seat on the sofa, "Yeah, maybe its good you got us talking about this stuff."

Sheldon turned away from his computer, "Well, look at that. Even when I'm causing problems, I make the world a better place. Hey, next why don't we tackle your penchant for whining and Penny's love of the ol' glug-glug?"

Penny took a sip of her wine and rolled her eyes, "Sheldon, I think we're good for now."

He stood up, "Very well, so does this mean you'll finally pick a wedding date?"

She was getting upset again, "Ugh, here we go again! Why is everyone so concerned with us setting a date? We're committed to each other. We're happy, a ceremony isn't gonna change anything."

Sheldon came into the living room, "So you're never getting married? It's his whining, isn't it?"

Leonard was getting upset too, "Look, all she's saying is, we are in love. So it doesn't matter if we get married tomorrow, or a year from now or 50 years from now."

She looked at Leonard, "EW, fifty? We'll be old and gross."

"Yeah, but we'll be old and gross together."

She looked to Leonard and smiled. She got off her chair and came and sat down beside him, she leaned in and whispered to him, "Um, I'm free tonight."

He stared into her eyes and she looked back and they both smiled, "Are you saying you wanna get married?"

She grinned back at him, "Vegas isn't that far away."

He felt a rush of excitement, "I'm in! Let's do it!"

She let out a shriek and slipping closer they hugged and kissed.

Sheldon turned back from his computer, "After all these years. I'm really happy for the two of you."

They both replied, "Thank You!"

Back at the Wolowitz living room Howard was looking out the window, "Bernie, Stuart just pulled up."

She came out of the kitchen. She was dressed in a black dress covered in flowers. Her bodice was elastic and the skirt was full. She had on black thigh-hi tights and figured if she flashed Stuart a bare thigh; it might soften the blow, so to speak. She sat down and Howard leaned over the sofa, "So remember, the key is to be firm, show no weakness."

She nodded, "Right!"

He came in with a large bag of groceries, "Hey guys!"

Howard stopped him, "You got a minute?"

"Sure, just let me put this stuff in the fridge. I felt bad finishing your yogurt. So I bought more. Howard, your favorite fruit is in season, Crunch Berries!"

Howard sat down and Bernie turned to him, "Don't let that sway you."

He grunted, "Its hard not to. They taste so much better than real berries."

He came back into the living room and took a seat across from them, "So what's up?"

She placed her hand on the hem of her skirt and slowly raised it up her covered thigh, "So Stuart we need to talk."

Stuart looked back at her, "Is everything okay?"

"Well, you've been living here a while now."

He nodded, "I know, I may sell comic books at work, but the real superheroes are sitting right in front of me."

Bernadette was stuck and she spoke really slowly, "Yeah, so anyways, what I'm trying to say is--"

Stuart's phone went off and he looked at it.

Howard leaned in, "You need to take that?"

"It's my dad; probably calling to wish me a happy birthday. I'll call him back. You were saying?"

Bernadette put up her hand, hold on for one minute, please. Howard, can I see you in the kitchen?"

They went in there and Bernadette punched him, "We can't throw him out on his birthday?

"I know, but he's expecting us to tell him something?

"Hold on, I have an idea. She opened the cupboard and pulled out a cupcake, opened a drawer and pulled out a candle and lighting it, brought it out to the living room.

Stuart's eyes lit up as Bernie and Howard began singing, "Happy Birthday to you."

He blew out the candle and looked up to Bernie and smiled, "I sure hope my wish comes true."

She patted him on the shoulder, "What was your wish Stuart?"

He cleared his throat and looked to Howard and back to Bernadette, "I was hoping for another go round, you know like last week, in your bedroom, dressed like a gymnast?"

She looked to Howie, "Well, what do you think? We struck out on all the other fronts tonight, how about it Howie; wanna watch me fuck our roomie?"

He shrugged, Might as well, at least some one should end up with a happy endings?"

She grinned down at Stuart, "Looks like your wish will be coming true; strip buster!"

Howard took a seat across from them and slipped out of his pants and undershorts. He sat down and lazily began stroking his cock as he watched his tiny bride and Stuart get naked.

Stuart was naked well before Bernadette and he helped her remove her dress and bra. He could never get enough of her full, firm tits. He toyed with her large aeroules until she slapped his hands away.

"Wait till I get naked, Stuart, we have all night, right Howie." She kicked off her shoes and removed her tights and panties. Now naked, she looked at Stuart, "I'm all your, Happy Birthday. How would you like me?"

He chuckled, "I sorta liked you the way you were up in the bedroom last week."

She giggled and sat down on the sofa. She spun around and planted her legs on the back of the sofa. She planted her shoulders on the edge of the cushion and hung her head downward, "Grab a cushion and kneel on it, I believe your cock should be at the perfect position."

He jumped up and threw a cushion on the floor before her and leaning forward, he watched as her mouth opened and she took the head of his cock into her mouth. He leaned over and buried his face exactly where he had it last week.

Bernie let out a shriek and began sucking on him like crazy. Her long golden locks were sweeping all over his legs and belly as she allowed him to fuck her mouth. She was in heaven and wanted him to teach Howard how to eat pussy and ass as well as he could. She was already close to cumming and when he shoved a finger in her pussy and pulled it out, she knew where it was going. She tried to keep her ass muscles from tightening, but as soon as she felt him sink it into her, she tightened. She released it as fast as she could and felt him sink it in deeper. She let out a gasp and sucked harder on his invading cock.

Howard was amazed on how fast she came and wanted to know how he did that. He stood up and walked around to the back of the sofa and watched as Stuart licked and sucked on her pussy and was amazed how he alternated from finger-fucking her pussy and then her ass. He caught on and made a mental note to try that later.

Stuart felt like he was going to cum, but he wanted her ass again. He mustered up all his willpower and knelt up. He closed his eyes and pulled away from her sucking mouth. He heard a pop as her lips released his cock. He flopped down on the sofa and grabbing her by the waist, he rolled her over and found her atop his. He swept her tousled hair from her face and he kissed her, raining kisses all over her face, neck and down to her heaving tits, "I want your ass again, Bernadette!"

She giggled, "I thought you might, I'm sure you got it nice and ready, do you want me on top? Forward or reverse?"

He chuckled, "How about reverse, then Howard can come and join us. I remember when Raj fucked your hot pussy, I could feel him fucking you as I fucked your ass; it was wild."

She giggled, "Aw Stuart, you're such a softie, come on Howie, want a piece of this?"

Stuart guided her onto his cock and as he slipped into her ass, he pulled her back to him, "Never call a guy a softie when he's about to fuck your ass, Bernie."

She giggled, "Yeah, bad choice of words. NOW FUCK MY ASS STEWIE!"

He began pumping up and down as her feet were planted on his thighs; this was giving his the space to pump in and out of her at a furious pace.

Howard came in and slipped his stiff cock into her juicy cunt. "Oh my God Bernie, you're so fucking wet and tight. I was jacking off so hard, I don't know how long I'm going to last."