A fictional story about fictional characters.
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Even after dating for so long and finally becoming engaged to be married, it never ceased to amaze Penny how thoughtful and lovable her boyfriend; no, make that fiancee; could be. While she was showering, he had slipped into her apartment, left her a small box tied with a glittering silver bow on her living room coffee table, and then left without announcing his presence. As she stood, her now short blond hair still damp, and her body concealed by only a wrapped lavender colored towel, she untied the bow and looked inside. It contained a box of gold embossed business cards printed with her name, contact information and the words "Pharmaceutical Representative" in capital letters. She actually felt her eyes tearing at the thoughtful gesture of her sensitive nerd. After years of just barely scraping by as a waitress at the Cheesecake Factory while trying to establish an acting career, she had recently found very lucrative employment at the pharmaceutical company where her friend (and former waitress colleague) Bernadette was employed.
Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz was a petite blond bombshell with incredible breasts who just happened to be a brilliant microbiologist, and she had worked at the Cheesecake Factory to pay her way through grad school while she earned her PhD. Penny had actually introduced Bernadette to her husband, Howard, who was a close friend of her fiancee Leonard's. Penny often marveled at how incongruous her relationship with any of her current circle of friends was. She was the only one without at least a Masters Degree in something (she had barely scraped by in high school). The "Core Four," or the "Four Nerds" as she thought of them, consisted of her Leonard, Howard, Raj Koothrappali, and Sheldon Cooper...all total "brainiacs." The "head nerd" was Sheldon, who often quoted his IQ as being over 180, and was totally oblivious to normal human compassion. Penny had often thought that he might actually be from another planet. His girlfriend, another scientist, was Amy Farrah Fowler; a very plain girl who was actually Sheldon's perfect match.
When Bernadette had received her doctorate and retained a job at a giant pharmaceutical company in its research division, she did not forget how friendly and helpful Penny had been during their waitress days. Penny had recently quit her waitress job to fully devote her time to her career as an actress, and when it looked like she would have to return to the Cheesecake Factory begging for her position back, Bernadette had secured an interview for Penny in the Sales division. Penny had studied all the materials Bernadette brought home for her, and had "aced" the interview (probably assisted by the short, slit skirt she had worn that day). No matter, Penny was proud of her new position, and had attended all the sales seminars and classes she could sign up for. The position paid very well and Penny no longer had to rely on Leonard for financial help, so she was determined to go to any lengths to keep her job. As she continued to study the cards, she read aloud, "Pharmaceutical Representative, I like the sound of that."
Returning to her bedroom, she let the damp towel fall to the floor and inspected her naked form in the full length mirror on the back of her door. "Not bad," she thought as she cupped her perfectly firm 34 C breasts, "Leonard, you are one lucky nerd." She had a huge presentation scheduled for today with a medical group consisting of several doctors, so she wanted to look her best...sexy, but still professional. She smoothed moisturizer into her long shapely legs and decided she did not need panty hose, only a tiny pair of pink lace thong panties. No one else would be aware of how skimpy her panties were, but they would give her the confidence of knowing how sexy and desirable she was. Her plan was to go braless, but she decided that with her prominent nipples, she had better put on the matching pink lace bra. Topping the outfit off with a plain, white business-like sleeveless blouse and a tight gray skirt with a slit up the side. The matching gray jacket could be taken off during the presentation for dramatic effect. She would cap the outfit with a pair of five inch heels which would tighten up her calf muscles and make her perfect legs seem endlessly long.
The product she was featuring today was her company's version of the "little blue pill," a substitute for the "V" drug for male enhancement and stimulation. She had been strictly forbidden by her company from mentioning the "V" drugs name, so as so avoid any possible patent infringement or copyright violation. Bernadette had actually worked on the drug in its early developmental stage, but, of course, had finished her involvement long before the testing stage had begun. What made her company's drug unique was that it was administered in the form of an inhaler, just like an asthma inhaler (it could be inhaled directly into the mouth or its mist just inhaled through the nose); and its effect was immediate...no waiting for a pill to dissolve and be absorbed.
Another unique feature was that it was equally effective on females: it increased the production of hormones and pheromones thus pushing their sex drive almost to the point of nymphomania. In males, of course, it produced an immediate erection which lasted one hour, no matter how many orgasms were achieved. The duration of the drug was exactly one hour in a person of average weight, and the company had named it simply "HARE." The joke around the office was it was so named because the recipient would be able to fuck like a rabbit for an hour. It actually was an acronym for H-human, A-arousal, R-reactive, E-enhancement.
There were several different warnings on the package that only one dose should be used during a four hour period, but it neglected to say what the consequences were. After all the testing and FDA trials and approval, the company had discovered that another unique side effect of HARE was that if a person inhaled more than one dose at a time, it would induce temporary amnesia...the person would completely forget what had transpired in the hour the drug was in effect. Only a handful of executives at the company knew of this side-effect, and they agreed that it would remain their secret. The development of HARE had cost them a small fortune, and they would go to any extremes to keep it on the market. When it came to marketing the sexual-enhancement drug, they had all agreed that with her natural assets, Penny would be their primary salesperson. She had been supplied with an entire trunk of sample size inhalers to distribute on her sales calls.